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Jane resonates is an understatement.. I think you know the back and forth I go to in regards to my weight. From the reactions I receive by those around me I can say I'm "just right" so I know a part of it is working on self love and acceptance of my perfectly flawed beautiful body.

Some days I'm there.. But others I compare...

Just a couple of days ago some chick shows up on the veterans forum with the title "just prancing around on my size 2's" ugh! I want to slap her :P

And I question am I being lazy not working harder?? Comparing to each other is the devil I say..

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Yep, CGJ. I have a close friend that has been changing lifestyles and losing weight over the last months (non WLS). She started a year ago Dec. She has lost all but three pounds to her goal of 139. Probably in the 35-40 lb. weight loss range. We are buddy's and keep each other going so ce we are both competitive. And therein lies the problem. I am 5'8". She is barely 5'5". I weigh 144 now and goal is 140 to have a nice bounce. When she said her goal is 139, guess what my new goal wants to be?? Anybody. Anybody???

 

I lost an even 100 after surgery and reached my GOAL 8 months later. Regained almost 30 lbs and took me from June to October to get back there!

 

What I'm saying is we are probably NEVER gonna be really completely content with ourselves. Ever. Am I denying myself anything? Nope. Just ate like a horse ( excuse CGJ :) and walked my tail off to not lose ground. Happily right back to where I was before cruising.

 

I'm almost 60. May look at things a little bit differently because I am married and not dating. I cannot even imagine the terror that would put me in! I'm rooting for All of you!! OD, CGJ, GT. And if I missed one or two. Forgive.

 

Yep, we are all different but all alike too! I love and send encouragement to all of you. I truly feel "knit" to this gang!

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Jane resonates is an understatement.. I think you know the back and forth I go to in regards to my weight. From the reactions I receive by those around me I can say I'm "just right" so I know a part of it is working on self love and acceptance of my perfectly flawed beautiful body.

Some days I'm there.. But others I compare...

Just a couple of days ago some chick shows up on the veterans forum with the title "just prancing around on my size 2's" ugh! I want to slap her :P

And I question am I being lazy not working harder?? Comparing to each other is the devil I say..

There is this little part of me that thinks they are all liars - except Steven, for some reason I believe him...haha. Well, and he never says that I am skinny - what he tells me is that I am voluptous just the way that most men prefer women to look - including him.

Most of my friends told me I was just right when I weighed "190"... then when I was "170"... so why should I believe them now, right? Actually, two of my friends have had a fairly serious talk with me. That I really am just right. My friend who helped me in Mexico hadn't seen me for awhile and was very complimentary to my looks but told me that the bony looking chest and neck was already looking a little "old" so cut it out with the thinking I need to lose more weight. I believed her for some reason. She struck my vanity cord - damn I think I would rather be a little plump then look old.

I too had a negative reaction to the prancing in the size 2 post. However, it hit me, I don't need to be a size 2, I look good how I am. Some people are rightly size 2, meaning it suits their body type; however, some people just look skinny and unhealthy. I hope it is a good size/weight for her, but it is irrelevant to me.

A dear friend of mine is a skinny minny. She is in her late 50s and while she has taken great care of her body and is very well groomed - I think she looks way older then her age because she has like zero body fat - that is not sexy or even healthy looking in my eyes. She looks like a broomstick to be honest. She is about 5'1" or so and weighs around 95-100#. She told me once that she knows how people get aneroxia because she knows she is skinny but still looks in the mirror and thinks there is fat. I look at her and think she looks fragile, she is developing a bit of a humpback and she lacks physical strength (I know this because we are horse people and she can barely lift a saddle) - she reminds me of a very well groomed, expensively dressed granny which I guess is just what she is!

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Ugh!!!!!! So gamergirl is behind the scenes PMing me and Asking about my goal weight she compares herself to me even though she jus discovered I'm only 5'4... She's 5'6 Her new thing? My frame size... Ugh!!! UGH!!!! According to this I'm a small frame???? But **** I have very long fingers does that not negate this "scientific" test??? It says because my fingers totally over lap I'm a small frame therefore should top out at 127??? UGH!

 

 

 

http://quizstop.com/askcalc1.htm

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Ugh!!!!!! So gamergirl is behind the scenes PMing me and Asking about my goal weight she compares herself to me even though she jus discovered I'm only 5'4... She's 5'6 Her new thing? My frame size... Ugh!!! UGH!!!! According to this I'm a small frame???? But **** I have very long fingers does that not negate this "scientific" test??? It says because my fingers totally over lap I'm a small frame therefore should top out at 127??? UGH!

http://quizstop.com/askcalc1.htm

And in the end, does it matter? it is just another guess... another table... another rough guideline but in the end it is your own body and situation that should help define a goal weight.

Mine touch if i cut off my circulation, if I do it comfortably, they don't quite touch. Makes sense to me - I think I do have a larger body frame but it doesn't change my opinion about the weight I look and feel good at.

GG is East Indian I believe. I have several friends from India and their body types are so different then mine, I have no idea how or why they should be comparable regardless of the wrist test. The Indian women I know have tiny bone structures/narrow shoulders, do not develop much muscling even when they work out and are prone to losing their waists with age - even more so then caucasion women. In theory, it seems like they should weigh less then me due to those factors, but i don't really know. I think that she is at that phase of uncertainty.... been there, spent a long time there so I get it, but it is the mistake to set our own goals based on others. besides, you don't need that responsibility!!!!

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Yeah, I think I'm going to stop answering her PMs.. :P

MY fingers lap over I'm 5'8". No way I am a small frame!!!

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Good! I'm calling bullshit on that stupid method!

I'm not small frame either, I'm a stout German\ Portuguese woman!! :D

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Good! I'm calling bullshit on that stupid method! I'm not small frame either, I'm a stout German\ Portuguese woman!! :D

I'm a tall at least medium frame Indian/German. Ha !!!

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I am still looking for help with my profile. I wish I could think of some funny line to add in there., What I may have to do is go through other women's profiles with a note pad.

 

I sort of fasted yesterday because I was so bad on Saturday. It made fasting today rather easy.

 

I can defintely see a difference in my moods and my weight when I go in and do at least a little bit of cardio. I haven't cried one time today. This is a first. Also, it's been a month since I've talked to him, and I am getting more used to being home without him. The hard part is I've  never lived in this  house without him. he was my bf when I found this house.

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CG Jane, a metric ton of yes, that post resonated like the bells of Notre Dame, it is everything I was trying to say in my post that started this.

I was eventually able to eat yesterday and got about 670 cals. I'm on my cycle right now and HAD TO HAVE salty food so my Protein was pastrami and turkey Jerky, so I was perfectly calm when I weighed myself this morning and was "up" a pound, I know it's not real, I know it is retention from the salt.

Today it is Protein Shakes, salad if I can get greens, kelp Snacks for my salt desires, and probably some green drink. I don't want to have a Quest bar but may have to for the Fiber, they are the only way I can approach my fiber goals.

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I tell you ladies, we could write a book! Reading your stories was like looking into a secret world. Of course, its not secret to me, I have had much of the same experience, but its not the story that gets told in public that often.

I started dieting at age 10, my family doc put me on Dexedrine, can you believe it!? Mom figured it out, and took me off right away, but that was the era for ya... Honestly, I look at photos of myself from then, and I was not even fat. I sure did think there was something wrong with myself that I needed to "fix" though. Like you Jane, In highschool I was bigger than most of my friends, but probably weighed 150 pounds. I wore a size 10 shoe, and was 5' 7", not even fully grown. Twiggy was the ideal when I was post puberty. I could never look like her, but always wished I could. I was always a cloths horse, loved to dress up, and got lots of attention for it. I wore a 13 until around age 30 something... then the weight started creeping up. Of course I was on a diet the whole time. Thank goodness I never got into any long cycles of binging or barfing... I did get so depressed I couldn't eat in my 30s, lost 35 pounds pushing away green salads and dancing at the clubs every week. I had a split mind on how I looked, I could dress up, and felt ok about the results. and at the same time, was never quite happy with it, I thought I was a little too fat, too big. (I was 5'10" for heavens sakes, with big bones) Diets I went on did not really get me to goal, but how could they! My goal was to feel a certain way, which was not totally weight related. In 89 I went to India for 6 months, had a great time, lost 35 pounds without going on a diet, but when I came back things changed. I gained over 50 pounds in a couple of months... eating what I wanted, (which I was doing when I lost the 35 in India) That got me to the 250s. I Really felt fat then. I never got out of the 200s after that. Only when I started getting co-morbids did I really think about WLS, and for a change, it was not motivated by how I looked (read that "how I look=my worth as a human being, how I am seen/valued by others, my desireability....) After many attempts at losing through the years, without success, I did work on feeling good about myself whatever weight, knew fat acceptance people, had friends of all sizes I loved and didn't judge for their weight, did affirmations, and generally tried to accept myself how I was.... I bought clothing all the time, because, they never quite made me feel the way I wanted to...(slim!) I have always worn black, but that was the only color in the closet. I stopped going out as much. It started effecting my creativity. In the arts, it doesn't hurt to be the "whole package". Most of the ladies artists look great/sexy in photos, as well as can make art.... Anyway. I was still looking in all the wrong places for my happiness. Now I don't even want to be the same size I was when I thought I was still to fat... 150. That is an accomplishment anyway. We are sold this bill of goods by example, advertising, sample sizing, how character actors traits are sometimes size dependent (the fat and jolly, the fat and boyfriendless, the fat and ridiculed, the fat sidekick... the fat and sexless, the fat and lazy...) I was afraid I would be seen as all these things, obscuring all the hard work I have done on my other skills. Now that Im not fat, I have transferred all that to my age! Ha! I AM wiser now than I was then though, and want to be an old lady roll model for younger ladies. So I really try and wear my wrinkles with pride. As part of a larger culture, we are seen through a filter, but not by everyone, and hopefully not by ourselves. It may be frustrating, but its not true unless its true. (sometimes I am lazy :P )

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I am really bummed that I gained .6 of a lb after a day of fasting. I didn't cheat yesterday. I usually lose if I fast and exercise. Now today, I don't know what to eat.

 

I was writing to some guy in Portlan where my son lives. Last night I talked to him on the phone. We are going to get together when I go to Portland. Now I have something to look forward to.

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I think you all know I haven't lost any weight via 5:2. That hasn't changed...

Did I post about us being burgled while we were away? We got robbed of a bunch of jewelry (my wedding band) and cash and they slightly trashed our place. We JUST wrapped up that insurance claim, mostly, as of last week.

So here's a new tale involving a flood -- which (spoiler alert!) results in us having to quickly move out to...somewhere...at some point very soon...while they completely renovate our apartment -- floors, walls, etc.
Luckily, we had a pregnant friend staying with us -- thus she had to get up and use the loo in the wee hours, whereupon she stepped out of the guestroom and into a couple of cm of cold Water all over the floor. She awoke me and I tried to wake up and make sense of all the cold water, and the rushing water noise coming from the kitchen, Naturally, I woke the mister up immediately and he came out and quickly found the source and tried to Do Something.

BUT...an old pipe had burst -- corroded and worn beyond its ability to cope (can I relate?), it had simply chosen the wee hours of Sunday morning to go un-gently into that good night. It gushed water at pressure into the apartment for a couple of hours at least, while we foolishly slumbered peacefully.
The Super was called, and he turned off the water. The fire brigade was called, and they brought a crew and big water-sucking machinery to get the water out. The massive wool carpet completely immersed in water was dragged to the terrace to hopefully dry out and survive...
We hoped for the best...but the damage had been done. The inspector today said that we must move out asap so that they can replace walls, floors, etc. For at least two months. With little notice. We're a bit stressed, but are trying to sort it all out via the (at least) two different insurers involved so far...
So things are still up in the air. So CROSS ALL YOUR FINGERS!! Especially that we have continuous internet access!!?
We're only slightly mental at the moment, but I'm sure we'll have our moments. While you're at it, send good vibes our baby/dog's way, cos he is also not doing ideally well right now either, but we don't know what's wrong with him.
Dee xo

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Hi Ladies...I have been reading but haven't been posting. I had a rough week. The whole PMS thing really messes with me. I woke up feeling a lot better today so I think I'm back on track. Fasting today and it's going just fine. I am so glad I feel better. I feel so bad for my family having to put up with my terrible mood swings during my PMS week. :(

CJ, I know what you are talking about with looking old. I feel like I look older now. People tell me I don't but I can't stand the lines in my face now from the weight loss. I also am small up on top...my chest and collar bone. Btw, I don't think you look old, I think you look great!

Since doing 5:2, the 10 pounds I lost went away in my face, more in my chest, my feet and my waist. I didn't want to lose it in any of those places. I want to lose it in my butt, hips and thighs! When I was measured a couple weeks ago with my trainer my waist was a 26...I think I look off balance now because my waist is little and then out pop my hips and butt. It's hard to find pants and skirts that fit because they are always too big around the waist but fit ok everywhere else.

Seems like must of us are struggling to be happy with who we are and where we are at. I'm hoping to get this figured out one day. Some days I feel like I do and I am happy when I look at myself. Other days, not so much I pick apart every little thing wrong with myself. I find that when I'm stressed out that I immediately start the negative talk in my head. I don't know why I do this.

FYE, thanks for you words of wisdom. I always love reading what you write! What kind of work do you do in the arts? I would love to see some of your work! You should post some pics.

Georgia, I didn't know you were going on a Disney cruise! I LOVE WDW. Love it! I want to go on a Disney cruise sometime! I am so glad you had a great time and enjoyed yourself. And look, you came home just where you were when you left. That is success!

I know I didn't address all of you but I am thinking of you all and the struggles and successes that you are having. I love our group! I know I say that a lot but I really do! This has turned into so much more than a 5:2 group for me.

Thanks to all of you who commented on my pictures. I appreciate your kind words. Still, to this day, I love to see before and afters from others' and I'm always amazed when I look at them.

Ladies, one more thing...I know this is long. I'm a bit nervous about the next month or so with the holidays coming up. I don't know why I feel nervous, maybe because I can eat more than I used to? Next week is Thanksgiving, the following week I have a work trip to Arizona with my hubs for 4 days. They feed us really well at those things. Thankfully I don't drink so I don't have any added calories there. And then Christmas with all of the parties and such. I just wanted to put it out there that I'm nervous and anxious about this. Anyone else feeling this way?

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