"you must feel so much better now..."

[LDallas 108]

I think i'm going to SNAP if one more person says this to me!!!!! (regarding my 80 lb wt loss). My response has been,"not really because i didn't feel bad, before". So irritating! People assume if you're overweight you're in terrible health and feel awful all the time. It would be nice if they'd just say you look good, or that's fantastic..or something like that.

Whew! Thank goodness for this RANT section! LOL

[cbd 78]

Yes this must bother you. It's funny cause when people tell me how good I look I usually reply that I feel so much better.

[aliekat55 157]

perhaps they mean 'emotionaly better'. I certainly hope that after huge weightloss like you, that I feel better about life. IMHO

[pottergirl 261]

Oh yeah!!! I had a woman in my store yesterday..and not only did she say " you were REALLY overweight but you must feel soooooo much better now" I think she said you were so look overweight 3 times at least! I am surprised she didn't say you were disgustingly obese !!! I don't mind the people who say you are so pretty or beautiful now.....and then quickly but you were always pretty....Lol, don't mind that at all!

[LDallas 108]

Pottergirl i'm stunned at that lady's commentary!! I can't imagine saying it once, let alone three times! Arrrrrgh!!!!!

Aliekat...i think they mean physically. Either way i think its rude to make assumptions on anyone's physical or emotional state and then to comment. I dont think anyone's trying to be rude. I've noticed the commentors are life long skinnies, and IMO they must have been looking at me before like "tsk tsk poor decrepit fatty...", when in fact i've always looked pretty good, dressed nice, and been active.

[lilbearzmom 584]

People say this to me all the time too. I don't mind because they are right in my case.

[melissa130 135]

Ldallas-- I am thinking you must be pretty young. The truth is 99% of people that lose so much weight do feel better. I sure do. Mentally and physically. However, I agree with you. I find it amazing when so many people out there think they are sending a compliment-- but they couldn't be more insulting. At first I got so snappy. One lady at work said to me--- " Wow- you look great--you so morbidly obese" in front of every body. I hated her!!!! But now I do not let these people get to me. I refuse to let them bring me down.

[LDallas 108]

Melissa...i'm 51.

[Arts137 1,811]

with every lost pound, less pain, less HBP, less chance for DM, less SOB going up stairs. In my case, yep, I feel better...

[NoneYa 380]

I'm still pre-sleeve but when I have lost noticeable weight iI don't want anyone to say anything more than "you look nice". I know a few people that have never said directly to me that i am fat but will definitely say something when i no longer am. I will try to think of a way to cut them off at the pass because i think the dramatic " you were SOOOO large!!!!!!!" That I expect to hear will be as hurtful as it would be now.

[LipstickLady 25,682]

:thud:

That would piss me off, too. I am a very healthy, very active fat person. I had this surgery so I could STAY healthy because I knew my good fortune wouldn't last forever.

Am I feeling better as I lose? Of course? I would also feel better putting my fist through the teeth of someone who said that to me, but I wouldn't say that out loud.

[belladona 153]

yesterday was my first day back to work since the surgery, its been 3 weeks a woman at work said to me omg you look 10 years younger. hmmmm idn im 45 i think my face at least carries itself ok , i was on the fence about that one.

[JamiO 52]

Maybe it's just me, but no matter what I did before surgery, wore my hair differently, bought a new dress, wore make up, etc. my coworkers would say "wow you look like you've lost weight, you're looking good". So I'd just respond by giving them a smile.

After the surgery people have told me crazy stuff, like "before surgery you looked swollen, now you don't" or "you can really just tell in your face".

But to be honest I could care less about what anyone says. I feel like I lived my life long enough basing how I felt on others comments. Now they can all kiss my shrinking butt!! Life is really too short to think too much on what other people say.

[SerendipityHappens 1,594]

I understand the irritation. Yes I DO feel better.. my knees don't hurt anymore.. but I don't feel like that's what most people mean by the comment.. I feel like they are talking more emotional... like before I should have been feeling all sorry for myself and ashamed because of my size... It's almost like they assumed that because I was 360 pounds, I must have loathed myself... uh, I felt about myself pretty much the same as I do now, only now I do it with less knee pain. I've always been active and accepting of my body.. I wasn't always the fattest person in the room and I definitely wasn't the fattest person in Walmart, but I was ALWAYS the fattest person on the hiking trail or at the mountain summit.. Fattest by about 100 pounds. Did I feel bad or ashamed about that? Nope.... and I think a lot of people have a hard time wrapping their minds around that.. They feel like I SHOULD have felt disgusting and full of self loathing.

[Indigo1991 1,612]

My "favourite" thing said to me at the moment is "you must have so much more energy". When pressed, people are really asking can I now do more than I used to be able to as a fatter person, which included running a company, running a home, doing voluntary work, having a social life and dating, a angst other things?

Mmmm, no.... I've only lost weight, I haven't managed to fit more hours in my day :-)