Ever been called fat by a kid?

[SerendipityHappens 1,594]

I was once called fat by a four year old and I wasn't offended at all... He was sitting on my lap.. and he looked at me and said "wow! Your stomach is really fat... and it feeeeeeeelllllssss just like JELLY!, Then he hugged me and sighed and said in the sweetest voice ever "yeah, JUST LIKE JELLY!" He didn't think fat was bad, he was simply amazed at how nice and squishy it felt.

A few weeks ago I was called a "fat, white, b!tch" by a 16 year old child who when I refused to sell him cigarettes on his mother's food stamp card.

As for kids who are health conscious. I have a five year old nephew who is that way to the extreme. He won't touch a meal unless there are vegetables on the plate and he'll always ask "which thing on here is the healthiest?" and then he eats that thing first. He won't drink soda, and tries to use his influence to deter others from drinking it either.... And don't even get me started on his oral hygiene routine.which is about 10 minutes of brushing, flossing, tongue scraping and rinsing.... and If he falls asleep without brushing his teeth, he'll get up in the middle of the night to do it.... and my sister is NOT a health nut.. it was just casual mentions of "don't eat to much of that it's not good for you" or "eat your vegetables, they'll make you strong and smart" stuff you tell all kids... But he takes it to the extreme. Poor kid is being treated for anxiety at just 5 years old which I'm sure is in some way related to his being overly concerned with his health.

[NoneYa 380]

I think the public schools should teach the word fat to not be negative...obviously if you are unhealthy being fat is negative but so is being skinny and I always hear people on here say they wanna be skinny. ..I want to be thinner but not skinny because skinny is unhealthy too. But when it comes to other people and describing their appearance if we teach children that the word fat is just a word to describe someone and not an insult then what is the big deal. I'm fat and most of the people (pre op and only recently post op) on here are fat too. If you were thin or average you wouldn't be getting this surgery. I say I'm fat and people say "no your not" and I say yes I am. I am fat, a brunette, brown eyes, wears glasses, etc. Its just a way to describe me...nothing negative about it . Not an insult so why should it hurt

I don't agree with this at all. You are teaching children that its ok and not hurtful because you're ok with it. You only need to read the other responses in this thread to see that many others do not feel the same way. Teach children the definition of words and give them the proper way to use them. At the same time you need to teach children that words can be powerful and if used in a certain way can be hurtful. My children have never been permitted to make personal remarks about each other or about anyone else unless they are complimentary ( you look very nice today). Personal attacks are not funny on any level. Fat or thin, short or tall we're all human and words can be life altering. The best way I have found to teach that is when they have done it is to ask them to write a paragraph telling me how hearing that might make them feel. It makes them think and gets the point across. After all, you can't hurt my feelings by calling me short but I know a few people that could and have been very hurt by height remarks.

[rsmont77 101]

I always taught my children that the word "fat" was the "F" word and if they said it they would get in trouble. One day my 5 year old daughter said the cashier was a "tall" man...., he was short and overweight :-/

[******** 397]

I don't agree with this at all. You are teaching children that its ok and not hurtful because you're ok with it. You only need to read the other responses in this thread to see that many others do not feel the same way. Teach children the definition of words and give them the proper way to use them. At the same time you need to teach children that words can be powerful and if used in a certain way can be hurtful. My children have never been permitted to make personal remarks about each other or about anyone else unless they are complimentary ( you look very nice today). Personal attacks are not funny on any level. Fat or thin' date=' short or tall we're all human and words can be life altering. The best way I have found to teach that is when they have done it is to ask them to write a paragraph telling me how hearing that might make them feel. It makes them think and gets the point across. After all, you can't hurt my feelings by calling me short but I know a few people that could and have been very hurt by height remarks.[/quote']

But overtime If we teach children that it shouldnt be something harmful then the next generation will be okay with it...all I'm saying is this offense to this word you all have is socially constructed because in many other countries it is a compliment to call someone fat and an insult for someone to be called skinny...so if we can socially construct it to not mean something offensive then this wouldn't be an issue at all. I just dont get it...if someone called you brown eyes...and you have brown eyes would you be offended? If someone called me a fat b***h...id be offended by the b***h part and the fat part I would just think they arent very creative.

Edit: I agree though about the part not to make comments about peoples' apperances but these are little kids we are talking about right? Sometimes they dont always have the best judgement

[Kalimomof3 613]

But what if they are just describing the person...is it wrong to call someone skinny?....in a lot of countries that would be the insult

I can understand it as a description from a young child but not one over the age of say 8. I have 3 kids 4,6,and 8 and I do think it is bad manners for them to call someone fat or refer to anyone by the way their body looks in any way unless they are describing them and at 6 & 8 both of my daughter's know the difference between name calling and description.Too many parents don't teach their children to be respectful of others and I confirm it every time someone compliments my kids for what I consider normal behavior .

I have been called fat by young brutally honest kids (hurtful but not as much knowing their intent) and also by poorly raised teenagers (that pissed me off ) My mom is thin and she never wanted to be called skinny so I think that can be equally offensive. Name calling is poor form period.

[NoneYa 380]

But overtime If we teach children that it shouldnt be something harmful then the next generation will be okay with it...all I'm saying is this offense to this word you all have is socially constructed because in many other countries it is a compliment to call someone fat and an insult for someone to be called skinny...so if we can socially construct it to not mean something offensive then this wouldn't be an issue at all. I just dont get it...if someone called you brown eyes...and you have brown eyes would you be offended? If someone called me a fat b***h...id be offended by the b***h part and the fat part I would just think they arent very creative.

Edit: I agree though about the part not to make comments about peoples' apperances but these are little kids we are talking about right? Sometimes they dont always have the best judgement

I see what you're saying but we are living here and now and in the US ( at least I'm in the US, not sure about anyone else). I don't know about future generations but I have 7 kids living in his one. As long as I'm in control they will need to think before they speak and consider he feelings of others. It's quite easy really. Just don't discuss others personal characteristics or behaviors. That goes for weight, height, intelligence, glasses, sexual orientation........ Anything. Words can be a weapon and one that causes pain forever. Kids aren't born knowing and have to be taught. We see what happens when they aren't. There is a new story in the media very week about the tragic results of hurtful words.

[ChristineR 128]

But overtime If we teach children that it shouldnt be something harmful then the next generation will be okay with it...all I'm saying is this offense to this word you all have is socially constructed because in many other countries it is a compliment to call someone fat and an insult for someone to be called skinny...so if we can socially construct it to not mean something offensive then this wouldn't be an issue at all. I just dont get it...if someone called you brown eyes...and you have brown eyes would you be offended? If someone called me a fat b***h...id be offended by the b***h part and the fat part I would just think they arent very creative.

Edit: I agree though about the part not to make comments about peoples' apperances but these are little kids we are talking about right? Sometimes they dont always have the best judgement

I think you are referring to small children whereas a good portion of these stories are to older children. I understand what you are saying, though, I just don't see it possible because, aside from a few countries, it's not viewed as a good thing. Found this article and thought it was really interesting: http://www.toptenz.net/top-10-countries-celebrating-female-obesity.php

(Offtopic) Although this topic is about kids offending adults it does go beyond that. If you have older (not these little ones with no filter yet) children having no issues being bullies to adults then imagine how they are with their peers. I have to say, nothing prepares you for the punch in the stomach when your kid comes home crying because they have been called fat or ugly or any slew of things. It doesn't matter what age it was done it makes you angry and sad as a parent. I want to keep my kids locked away in a huge love bubble but I can't. They have to experience the ugliness (and happiness) of the world and all I can do is try to guide them through their experiences and hope they come out unscathed on the other end.

[******** 397]

I think you are referring to small children whereas a good portion of these stories are to older children. I understand what you are saying' date=' though, I just don't see it possible because, aside from a few countries, it's not viewed as a good thing. Found this article and thought it was really interesting: http://www.toptenz.net/top-10-countries-celebrating-female-obesity.php

(Offtopic) Although this topic is about kids offending adults it does go beyond that. If you have older (not these little ones with no filter yet) children having no issues being bullies to adults then imagine how they are with their peers. I have to say, nothing prepares you for the punch in the stomach when your kid comes home crying because they have been called fat or ugly or any slew of things. It doesn't matter what age it was done it makes you angry and sad as a parent. I want to keep my kids locked away in a huge love bubble but I can't. They have to experience the ugliness (and happiness) of the world and all I can do is try to guide them through their experiences and hope they come out unscathed on the other end.

I thought the OP was speaking about small children. Yes being fat is unhealthy but looks wise there is nothing wrong with being fat. If I could live healthy to 100 being a big FAT beautiful woman I would. I wish people would tell their fat children (if they had them) that they are beautiful so there self esteem wouldn't be shattered if called fat as an adult by a 3 year old. I'm not invalidated anyone else's feelings ..I just think people need a thicker skin. The op was speaking about 5 year olds

[abranewme 98]

YES specifically a "chubby lumpkin" by a high schooler who looked like a roach in a mall behind my back. I ignored it but it hurt my heart.

[LouiseC 1,031]

Janice, your comments are off topic and perhaps should be taken and used to start your own thread on the societal views of fat?

[******** 397]

Janice' date=' your comments are off topic and perhaps should be taken and used to start your own thread on the societal views of fat?[/quote']

My comments started off on topic when I said if someone called me fat I wouldnt care because I am...then someone wrote that others may feel a different way so I was just trying to give advice on to how to not let it bother you. I didn't really understand how someone could take offense to what a 5 year old says. I'm not gonna waste my time with a topic on societal views of fat because ive noticed most people have already been brainwashed

[LouiseC 1,031]

My comments started off on topic when I said if someone called me fat I wouldnt care because I am...then someone wrote that others may feel a different way so I was just trying to give advice on to how to not let it bother you. I didn't really understand how someone could take offense to what a 5 year old says. I'm not gonna waste my time with a topic on societal views of fat because ive noticed most people have already been brainwashed

It was just a suggestion as you seemed keen to have that conversation.

Taking offence and feeling hurt are two different responses. I can feel hurt by what someone says without being offended. This perhaps comes with emotional maturity, with understanding that someone's intent was different to the consequence.

For example, I was hurt because it sucks to be obese, and I was on some level in denial about that, and having an innocent child point it out brings me out of my own denial and forced me to face an ugly truth about myself. And it was an ugly truth.

Fat is only attractive in societies and cultures where food is scarce. Fat in these historical cultural contexts has represented wealth and has therefore been seen positively. For a man in these cultures to have a fat wife it indicated that he was a good provider, therefore an attractive mate. What you see as people being brainwashed in societal views is in fact merely a representation of the biological imperative and in western culture, fat represents poor health and poor health is undesirable in a mate.