So Excited to Be Here! Now read my profound and eloquent story.

[Canary Diamond 186]

Hello, sleevers! I am so happy I found this place and looking forward to sharing our journeys. I've been overweight for 30 years (since age 8), but never considered WLS. I've gone on every diet, tried every weight loss med, been a vegetarian, a raw foodist, and an exercise nut. I never lost more than 15 pounds. I am capable, however, of gaining 30 pounds in a month. I do not have PCOS, thyroid issues, or even insulin resistance - my body just doesn't want to let go of weight.

Most recently, I spent four months in residential treatment for binge eating disorder, where I was treated like an anorexic. They took away all my exercise (had JUST gotten into a regular cardio/resistance routine), told me it was ok to eat Cookies, candy bars, and ice cream every day (so I did - all three - every day), and drilled into me that there was no reason to be afraid of food (I never had been, other than the fear of not having enough). I gained 20 pounds in treatment and was told I hadn't gained at all (we were not allowed to weigh ourselves or know our weekly weights). The experience was great for my head, as I learned many valuable tools for dealing with my emotions, analyzing my thoughts and behaviors, and communicating with others, but bad for my body. I've gained 15 more pounds since leaving treatment in November. I still overeat - I just don't feel guilty about it anymore.

I've never felt like a fat person and I know I'm not meant to be this heavy. Now I'm starting to have knee and back pain on a daily basis and I have bruises all over my body from bumping into things (I'm that unaware of my recently increased size). I resisted the idea of surgery because it was unnatural, like many people who've never struggled with weight, I thought I just wasn't trying hard enough. Then I realized it was no different from having LASIK or dental work; I am grateful for every day I wake up and don't have to put on glasses or deal with contacts to see, and I'm glad I have straight teeth, not the crooked, overcrowded mess that would have resulted if I'd never had those teeth pulled. Now I see WLS for what it is - a viable shot at freedom.

Thanks for reading.