How do I tell my children?

[Goddardgo 90]

I am very serious about getting this procedure. I have talked to my husband and just inofrmed my mom of my decision yesterday, but I'm not sure how much information is too much information for my kids. They are all old enough to realize that I am unhealthy, and I've contributed to them being unhealthy for years.. They are 10,12,16 and 17.

If anybody has advise on how much information I should share with them it would be so appreciated!!

[MaddieJ 82]

I told my children that I am having trouble with my stomach and they are going to have to do surgery so I asked the doctor to go ahead and do the weight loss surgery too.... they understood and are excited for me.

[Vixynne 695]

I have two children, aged 12 and 16, and it took me a little while to figure out what to say and how much to tell them. You know your kids best, but generally speaking, most teens can grasp the idea of surgery a little more concretely than, say, a preschooler can. If they already know you're battling health issues, that might be the way to approach it. Talk to them about your concerns; that you want to be around for a nice long while so that you can continue loving them for many, many years.

If they're techno-savvy, you might want to show them an image or two from Google Images that shows exactly what the surgery entails. Something clear and clinical rather than down-and-dirty like a YouTube video of a live surgery. This image, for example.

Then let them steer the conversation a little. Let them tell you their thoughts and worries, and try to answer each one, even if it seems like a silly question. Brushing them off will only make their imaginations run wild. Their responses will let you know what they want to know--that way you don't have to worry that you're telling them too much or overwhelming them.

Give them reassurance. They're going to be nervous about the surgery, most likely, just like you were (and maybe still are sometimes). Ask them for support, to help you make good food choices while preparing for surgery; to help you go for wallks or get more exercise before and after you're sleeved. They might even want to join in!

Good luck to you--I'm sure it will go well!

[memk 42]

I just basically told my 13 and 14 year olds that, I was doing this so I can be healthy and because I want to see them grow up and see any grand babies they give me.. Also my oldest is over weight and I told him I don't want him to go down this road.. So he is now motivated to go to the gym with me he has like 50 pounds to loose.. So it will be good... My youngest is my sweetheart and they opened a new Indoor Sky diving place here, and he has been waiting for them to finish it.. Well he know wants to wait so I can go and do it with him!!!

[JProx 161]

I told my 9 year old that I was having surgery and it was going to help daddy eat healthier.

[swimmom 124]

I was pretty open and honest with my 9 and 11 year old girls. They know I have struggled with my weight - and we don't talk about it as a vanity issue, but as a health issue. They know my Dad and my Brother and my Husband all struggle with their weight as well, and that it causes health issues. They have some with me to Weight Watchers for years, and they totally get the struggle with the scale, with losing and gaining. So I was honest about the surgery. The surgeon had given me handouts that had illustrations of the procedure. I showed the girls and explained what would happen, and how it would help me lose the weight and keep it off - and help me get healthier. I also explained how my eating habits would change, etc. I tried to involve them in the process as much as possible so they would not be afraid of it, and also so that they could understand it better. They have responded really well!!! They make fun of how little I eat now, but it's all in good fun (they are both on a competitive swim team and eat TONS and stay thin). Besides being a mom, I am also a teacher. Knowledge is power. I believe in being as honest as possible with the kids - it is a great teachable moment!

[Goddardgo 90]

Thank you so much for your responses!! I will be honest, and I do believe that all of the kids will be happy with my decision. I just have to get them over the fear of the actual procedure.. like I have to do myself

[ladybug71 19]

I told my 6 year old son and he frowned and said just one night? Then he said ok and when i am.skinny he wants.me to get blonde hair because i am.pretty! He is so sweet. My 12yr old.son doesn't care

[DaFierce1 71]

I WAS JUST OPEN AND HONEST, IF SHE HAS ANY QUESTIONS I ANSWER TRUTHFULLY... MY DAUGHTER IS 12

[hopingtolose2013 81]

My daughter is 8 and it's way too concerned about how skinny she is and she doesn't eat. Its been a struggle since she was two. I am terrified she will be anorexic. So We don't discuss weight loss around her. It is hard when everyone comments on how skinny she is. We don't need to add to her thoughts. So i will tell her its tummy surgery to fix a pain. I won't say anything at all about weight loss. When i start losing i will just say its healthy eating. I hate it has to be that way.

[funnygurl 8]

I am very serious about getting this procedure. I have talked to my husband and just inofrmed my mom of my decision yesterday' date=' but I'm not sure how much information is too much information for my kids. They are all old enough to realize that I am unhealthy, and I've contributed to them being unhealthy for years.. They are 10,12,16 and 17.

If anybody has advise on how much information I should share with them it would be so appreciated!! [/quote']

I have 11 & 9 year old girls. They are very mature girls and I sat with them along with my close family to explain my decision for wls. My situation is a little different in that I have to loose weight in order to quality for an organ transplant. So when I explained this to them they has many questions and I answered them as truthfully as possible. I have included them in all my food research, preps and even have had them learning to cook healthier. I'm very lucky to have such a supportive family.

[KitKat40 100]

I told my son that they was gonna fix my belly pain LOL ... & his concern is how long am I going to be @ the hospital & who's he staying with & I better not take to long because he will miss me

[Vixynne 695]

My daughter is 8 and it's way too concerned about how skinny she is and she doesn't eat. Its been a struggle since she was two. I am terrified she will be anorexic. So We don't discuss weight loss around her. It is hard when everyone comments on how skinny she is. We don't need to add to her thoughts. So i will tell her its tummy surgery to fix a pain. I won't say anything at all about weight loss. When i start losing i will just say its healthy eating. I hate it has to be that way.

The rule for me as a mom is to give my kids information that they can handle in terms they can handle. Sounds to me like you're doing that too--I totally support your choice!

[MystiGal 143]

I told my 9 year old daughter exactly what they were going to do to me and that I was doing it to be healthy for her. She was really excited, even went to the hospital with me. She asked if she could come in the OR and watch! lol She has been a great help and loves to help measure out my Protein Shakes and soup! You know your kids best, tell them as little or as much as you know they can handle.

[Cmt7831 186]

Hey there , I have a 9 yr old and 4 yr old. I told my kids that I am having surgery to help my body lose all this extra weight so I can be healthy and help them be healthy too and be more active and not in pain anymore. My 9 yr old gets it but my 4 yr old wont until I'm gone for 2 days.