Question for all the "Oh my god, what have I done?" people...

[SeriouslyChange 319]

12 weeks out here...and still regretting it. Yes' date=' I had evaluations. It was required by my insurance and dr. I passed everything. From talking to people who have had wls and reading posts on sites such as this, I think most go through the "OMG!" - regret stage. I have found that there are very few of us who do truly regret it & we are in a tiny minority here, but we do exist...I am accepting my decision each day more, but I still regret it every day...eating/drinking has gotten somewhat easier & losing weight is great...but if I could have it to do over, I wouldn't do it. I do not promote wls. I promote WW and exercise because it does work - consistency is the key. WLS - in my opinion - should only be for extreme circumstances. My extreme was mobility, or I wouldn't have considered wls and had wls. I've went into detail on other threads, and I have private messaged with those who want to know more about my regret..but in a nutshell for those curious, my life - unhealthy or not - was my life...and life is more than my clothing size or what Mr. scale says...and I didn't truly get that until I woke up from this surgery, regretting it.

For those who will have something negative to say to me yet again about me speaking my truth about my regret - Yes, I read, researched, and prepared for nearly a year ...my eyes were wide open...and I know exactly what my dr told me about the risks, consequences....and I know what I signed my name to on all my consent forms...and what those forms inform all of us about...[/quote']

No use crying over spilt milk. What's done is done, and you will never be normal again. Putting all of your energy into regret won't grow your stomach back. You should come to terms with the sleeve and move forward as it's never going to change.

[GGJIMENEZ 5]

I think it's interesting how the "regret" posts come in clusters. They are all over this forum right now. It's like they feed on each other. I will get flamed for this but sometimes I wonder. Those posts sure do attract a lot more attention than " I'm feeling great and obeying all the rules" posts do. Maybe it's a weird kind of bonding or popularity? At least the ones that regret without any complications?

Well I regret mine and most definitely don't say so to "be popular or bond". That is rude of you to say. I have a right to say say if I regret my decision or not.

[GGJIMENEZ 5]

Misty' date=' I'm fairly new to the forum but I've noticed what you said is true. What surprises me is the lack of serious research. I went to support groups and looked up the good and the bad. One can't be guaranteed anything in life, but you can be prepared.[/quote']

I researched for years and still regret my decision. And that is my right. I was prepared.

[buplee 556]

I'm sure not everyone is going to be happy with their decision to have surgery. What do each of you respectively regret so much? Especially those who say they researched the procedure for quite awhile and the ability to back out ahead of time.

[town976 15]

I'm sure not everyone is going to be happy with their decision to have surgery. What do each of you respectively regret so much? Especially those who say they researched the procedure for quite awhile and the ability to back out ahead of time.

And specifically.

[GGJIMENEZ 5]

I'm sure not everyone is going to be happy with their decision to have surgery. What do each of you respectively regret so much? Especially those who say they researched the procedure for quite awhile and the ability to back out ahead of time.

I regret mine because I thought I would bs able to at least have a bite of food without vomiting. I didn't expect to not be able to drink Water. I didn't expect to mourn food so badly. I also didn't expect complications such as my hematoma I formed. Before surgery I never over ate much. I have several metabolic conditions that cause me to retain weight and store al as fat. One of which is too much grehlin. Soothe drs thought his surgery would reduce to none, well it didn't and I still am producing too much. I just wish I could go back in time an not have done this. But all I can do now is deal with it for the rest of my life.

[buplee 556]

I regret mine because I thought I would bs able to at least have a bite of food without vomiting. I didn't expect to not be able to drink Water. I didn't expect to mourn food so badly. I also didn't expect complications such as my hematoma I formed. Before surgery I never over ate much. I have several metabolic conditions that cause me to retain weight and store al as fat. One of which is too much grehlin. Soothe drs thought his surgery would reduce to none' date=' well it didn't and I still am producing too much. I just wish I could go back in time an not have done this. But all I can do now is deal with it for the rest of my life.[/quote']

I really hope you medical issues are resolved. I'm sorry you have had so many problems. Thank you for responding. Do you think some therapy might help you come to terms with your food issues.

BTW- this is not a judgement . I have read many posts about people with regrets and I am trying to understand. I am trying to understand the people who can not come to terms with their respective issues. As for me, I no longer want to buy big and tall clothes, worry about fitting into an airplane seats, or have my wife endure comments or stares or try to justify or defends me because of her good looks versus my obesity.

[HatheryOnHerWay 603]

I regret mine because I thought I would bs able to at least have a bite of food without vomiting. I didn't expect to not be able to drink Water. I didn't expect to mourn food so badly. I also didn't expect complications such as my hematoma I formed. Before surgery I never over ate much. I have several metabolic conditions that cause me to retain weight and store al as fat. One of which is too much grehlin. Soothe drs thought his surgery would reduce to none' date=' well it didn't and I still am producing too much. I just wish I could go back in time an not have done this. But all I can do now is deal with it for the rest of my life.[/quote']

Thank you for replying to this thread. You're the sort of sleever was hoping to hear from. Not just people who've been slightly nauseous or uncomfortable for a few days post-surgery!

[GGJIMENEZ 5]

I really hope you medical issues are resolved. I'm sorry you have had so many problems. Thank you for responding. Do you think some therapy might help you come to terms with your food issues.

BTW- this is not a judgement . I have read many posts about people with regrets and I am trying to understand. I am trying to understand the people who can not come to terms with their respective issues. As for me' date=' I no longer want to buy big and tall clothes, worry about fitting into an airplane seats, or have my wife endure comments or stares or try to justify or defends me because of her good looks versus my obesity.[/quote']

Thank you I sure hope my medical issues are resolved too. I actually was already talking to a specialist/therapist before my surgery about my disorder that caused me to gain rapidly and never let it go, and she thought this would be good for me too. I still see her twice a month. She can't believe how little I eat, and is worried. This just wasn't good for me to do, a regret, and I just have to deal with it. Might be great for others but I wish I woulda listened to my husband and kids and intuition and not gotten it. I did it thinking positive and that everything would be ok, but it ain't. And that's just my personal experience. I'm very glad for those like you who have had a better experience with it and hope it continues on that way for ya.

[GGJIMENEZ 5]

Thank you for replying to this thread. You're the sort of sleever was hoping to hear from. Not just people who've been slightly nauseous or uncomfortable for a few days post-surgery!

Your welcome.....oh how I wish nausea and being uncomfortable we're my only issues. :/

[luckysmomma 407]

I don't respond to 'regret' posts for any reason, but to help others who regret it to not feel alone. Trust me, one does not feel popular when you post about regret. I typically get bombarded with negative crap & feel like crap due to it. Now, I don't allow it to bother me anymore. I am on this site to gain knowledge, get support, and come to terms with my new normal...my new life. Nobody is forced to read posts...I read posts of interest to me...certain posters - I don't even read the first word they post - I scroll on past them...people can do the same with my posts, if they choose.

Specifically, why do I regret it? Unhealthy or not, I miss my old life. I miss the life I had when I could drink & eat without discomfort. I was a food addict & diet coke addict before surgery, I freely admit it...but I didn't think about what I was going to eat or drink 24/7...now, it is pretty much a requirement of my new life. I miss cooking - yes, I still can, but why? I can't really eat. I miss going out to dinner - yes, I still go,but why? Again, I can't really eat or drink. Life isn't the same after wls, everybody knows that...people can say what they want to be positive about it...it will never be the same...it is different. To many, that different is great for them, they love it...I just don't happen to be one of those people. I thought I was prepared for the different - I wasn't, I guess, because I miss my old life...I don't feel like me! I also am embarassed & ashamed - which I didn't anticipate feeling - but I do. And yes, I do talk to those in the medical field about my thoughts & feelings about all this...I am more at peace with my decision every day...but it doesn't change the fact...that I regret it.

[buplee 556]

I don't respond to 'regret' posts for any reason' date=' but to help others who regret it to not feel alone. Trust me, one does not feel popular when you post about regret. I typically get bombarded with negative crap & feel like crap due to it. Now, I don't allow it to bother me anymore. I am on this site to gain knowledge, get support, and come to terms with my new normal...my new life. Nobody is forced to read posts...I read posts of interest to me...certain posters - I don't even read the first word they post - I scroll on past them...people can do the same with my posts, if they choose.

Specifically, why do I regret it? Unhealthy or not, I miss my old life. I miss the life I had when I could drink & eat without discomfort. I was a food addict & diet coke addict before surgery, I freely admit it...but I didn't think about what I was going to eat or drink 24/7...now, it is pretty much a requirement of my new life. I miss cooking - yes, I still can, but why? I can't really eat. I miss going out to dinner - yes, I still go,but why? Again, I can't really eat or drink. Life isn't the same after wls, everybody knows that...people can say what they want to be positive about it...it will never be the same...it is different. To many, that different is great for them, they love it...I just don't happen to be one of those people. I thought I was prepared for the different - I wasn't, I guess, because I miss my old life...I don't feel like me! I also am embarassed & ashamed - which I didn't anticipate feeling - but I do. And yes, I do talk to those in the medical field about my thoughts & feelings about all this...I am more at peace with my decision every day...but it doesn't change the fact...that I regret it.[/quote']

I understand and hope someday you were grow more at peace with your decision. Do you avoid social settings because of missing your old eating habits? i have been out with friends and family a few times and just order appetizers? My family is aware of my extensive neurosurgery but not about the sleeve, so they don't me about my weight loss. they usually pull my wife over to the side to ask. She just tells them I had to make a change for the sake of my spinal health and nothing is terminal. Are you experiencing complications how much have you lost so far?

[No game 14,437]

I know ole luckysmomma hates to read anything by me. But I will say it again. I wish they had a sub forum here for people with regrets, so that when people are coming here to research they can have a place to see these regrets..

Like right now there is someone asking us to talk her out of it. BUT...she wants it and all she sees here is everyone in love with their sleeve.

How can I really tell her there are people that are not, if there is nowhere to really find them?

[luckysmomma 407]

Buplee - Thank you. I do avoid social settings to an extent because I can't eat and drink certain things like my family & friends are used to me eating/drinking, but I am going out more as time passes...I just don't feel like myself now in such situations. I just always box up my meal after 2 or 3 bites. I feel like I am being very wasteful with food, which is not a good feeling for me when there's people hungry in this world. I am still going to Weight Watchers and the gym, so everyone thinks I am just losing it again for the gazillionith time doing those things. I have kept my sleeve to myself. No, I have been very lucky - no complications except dehydration. I have lost 69 lbs so far.

[buplee 556]

Maybe we need to send messages to Alex to ask that a sub folder be created. I agree it, it would be good to have a central folder for regrets, so pre-ops can read booths sides and make an educated decision. I had to do this after my neurosurgery when the surgeon told me I repaired your spine the best I could but lose weight or lose your ability to walk. I still may need to have additional surgery but my chances for success have improved greatly.