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Starting to wonder...



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...if this is the right thing to do. I know it is, but it is just starting to seem real to me, since my surgeon is ready to send everything to insurance. Before, it was basically just an idea, something that would be great if it happened but just didn't seem real. Now it's real, alright. I am starting to think, "Holy cow, what am I getting myself into?" I know this is the right thing for me, but convincing everyone else is starting to take its toll.

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You've already done the hardest part - realizing you needed this and now going through with it. Don't try so hard to convince others. Most of them (especially ones that never had weight problems) will never understand. Keep doing what you're doing, don't talk about it much and be proud of yourself. You're doing this for you - not anyone else.

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Everyone else does not have to live your life! Listen to the voice inside you...good or bad it is never wrong! that is our higher power coming thru to help us!

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If you know it's right, then it is. You don't have to convince anyone else, much as it would be nice to have their support. Could you just start smiling, and say something like "Thanks for your concern, I've made my decision"?

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Hey Laurend,

I had an "oh shit"right after my consultation. Until then it was just kind of this surreal idea - more something to just really think about & consider than to take action on. Walking out of the surgeon's office, after my consultation & setting a surgery date, I had a weird sort of reality-shock panic hit me hard. That was over a month before my surgery, and I was worried I would feel that way the entire time, but I didn't. It came in and rolled right back out, just like a wave.

Mys urgery was on a Wed, and the Saturday before I had a little anxiety. Off and on. The next day I was fine. The night before surgery I went to bed early, slept soundly the entire night, woke up just like it was any other day. No nervousness, anything. This is the exact opposite of what I expected, considering that for all intents & purposes this was my first surgery, I was terrified by the thought of an IV, etc.

I had one more moment of panic, it was after I'd been brought back to the prep area. They closed the curtains so I could change into my gown... I changed, and then *swoop* in it came and it brought me to tears. And I'm not a very emotional person, so that's saying a whole lot. I was standing there in this gown, willing myself to climb into the bed, and just couldn't do it. I had to ask my husband to tell me I was doing the right thing. I had to use an awful lot of brain power calming myself down. Just like having the date, there was something so FINAL about actually crawling into that bed. All in all the little attack only lasted maybe 10 seconds, and looking back I can think "how silly"... at the time I never really tried to leave or walk out, but there was something so incredibly frightening about actually getting in that bed.

Well I made it, and when they came over to get my vitals my pulse was something like 140. It only went up because like *that* I had 3 people on me, all doing something different (starting the IV, giving me a heparin shot, putting a hat on my head, etc.).

By this point the meds they give you are doing their job, and you're aware and mentally sharp, but very go with the flow. :)

If you think it would help you, the first day I could (I think later on the day after surgery) I journaled everything I could remember about the entire process in painstaking detail. Everything about pre-op, what I remember of the operating room, the first things I remember in recovery, etc. I'd be happy to share it with you. Since surgery was the great unknown, I know it would have helped me to be able to read a detailed account of what happens.

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Like Wheetsin, I too had a "moment". For the most part I made the decision quickly and never looked back....however, I had a "moment" a few days before surgery when I wondered if I would be able to adapt to the significant lifestyle change...and it wasn't so much would I be able to, but would I want to. That didn't last long at all.

My husband told me that when I woke up the day of surgery I had a smile on my face that went from ear to ear and it hasn't left my face since. He said that I was so happy on my way to the clinic that he though I was going to spit....LOL.

Laurend....Its your decision...you are the one who will reap the benefits from the surgery or suffer the consequences if you don't. Its up to you, don't bother trying to convince them..that can be stressful and exhausting...the simple fact is, you are doing it no matter what so they can get use to it.

Carol

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Lauren, you will do great. Don't let your family get you down. Surround yourself with lapbanders. Does your doctor have a support group? Good luck to you. Can't wait to hear about your progress. Its been a long road for you. Congrats.

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...if this is the right thing to do. I know it is, but it is just starting to seem real to me, since my surgeon is ready to send everything to insurance. Before, it was basically just an idea, something that would be great if it happened but just didn't seem real. Now it's real, alright. I am starting to think, "Holy cow, what am I getting myself into?" I know this is the right thing for me, but convincing everyone else is starting to take its toll.

The day I got approved, I was so excited, then I totally FREAKED OUT. I thought OMG, what am I doing? I know it is the right decision, but its scary too. Your whole way of eating is about the change, so its a big decision. I think what you are feeling is perfectly normal. If you know its for you, forget about everyone else (I have), and make YOUR choice. Only YOU can decide. Its YOUR body, YOUR decision.

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hi how are you my name is cathy. i had the same thing but i had my appointment then 4 days later i had my opperation so i didnt really have time to think bout it much the doctor was so nice he made me feel at ease. i was a bit worried on the sunday before but got over that. i have had it done for a few days now and feel ok. good enough to sit infront of the computer,

all i focased on was the end result a couple of months down the track and that got me through. the start of my new life was going to be exciting and im going to do things i held of on before.:)

as for telling people i told a fair few but you really find out who your friends are, the supportive ones and they are the ones that are goingto back you and who cares bout the other ones they arnt you real friends.

anyway good luck

luv cathy

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I cried all the way onto the operating table! As soon as I woke up I was like, okay, it's done and I'm glad I did it! It's been better then I ever dreamed! I was scared of the life change, scared of the money (had to pay for it out of pocket), scared of the surgery, scared of the recovery. Need I go on? I think it is normal. It is a life change and a surgery to boot. You would be worried even if you were getting your tonsils out! In any case. I think it is perfectly normal and I think once you come out on the other side you will be glad you did it! Good luck!

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Hahaha, the first thing I can remember doing in the recovery room was reaching up to feel if the breathing tube was still in place. My admitting nurse told me that very frequently, they'll wait for the patient to remove the breathing tube, as a sign that they're coming around. That freaked me out like you wouldn't believe. So at first, before I could open my eyes, I was just trying to sense whether or not it was there. Couldn't feel it, but reasoned that my senses could be subdued by the anesthesia, so (since I felt stupid about it) I tried to sheepishly pull the covers up over my mouth so no one would see me reaching up to feel if there was a tube sticking out or not.

Ok now you've got me going.

Being of lesser religious virtues, I never equated my surgery date of March 1 with ash Wednesday. Never in a million years. So as I was waking up, half in and half out, I saw two nurses with "smudges" on their foreheads and was nearly irate. I don't remember the exact dialogue, but to one it was something about how her tattoo made her look like Charles Manson, and to the other it was something about how dare she work in a surgical recovery area and be so filthy, shame on her, she needed to go bathe so I didn't get an infection.

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Oh Laurend

I think we ALL had that "OMG" moment - but it passes.

I was happy and ready to go right up until they brought my DH into the prep room before they put me under - then I started bawling like a little baby. Mercifully, I was asleep very shortly thereafter.

I love my band and wouldn't trade it for all the diet and exercise plans in the world.....

Hugs!

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