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Wife not thrilled.



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Hey All. Well, my wife is not at all thrilled with the idea of me having this procedure. You know, the normal concerns, complications, time off work, etc. I want her to check out this forum and read some pros & cons. She also wants to be present when I have my first consultation. I have no problem with that. She's a worrier anyway. This may be the hardest hill to climb!

Later, Joe

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Hi Joe, I had the same problem. At first my wife thought this was going to be an open surgery involving a long incision, etc. Once she learned it was laparoscopic she started to calm down a bit. But still worries about risks and complications, etc. She then started to ask why I could not just use diet and exercise. It's hard to explain why this is not a realistic option. Sometimes I still feel like a failure because those methods don't work for me. My wife does not have any issues with weight or food. It's just hard for her to understand why I would want/need surgery and a band on my stomach instead of just eating a little less. In some ways it's a good question. But I know diets are not going to work for me.

Anyway, I think now she is convinced that the risks associated with being 125 lb overweight are significantly greater than the risk of surgery, especially since I'm not so young anymoer (53), so she is reluctantly on board. I feel confident that eventually she will agree that this was the right thing to do, and be glad I did it. I do expect to lose substantial weight over the next year, and I think she will not mind that at all.

Good luck to you on this issue (and all the others).

Mark

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Joe, just try and share as much as you can with your wife during the presurgery phase. Once she understands more about the lapband the better off she will be to support you. Having a supportive spouse is really important. Good luck to you.

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Hi joe...you have been given some great advise above so there is not much more that I can add other than to say...letting her go to your initial consult is probably a great thing and introducing her to lapbandtalk so you are on the right track there. I hope that all goes well for you!

Best Wishes

:) becky

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I had similar situation. She did not give me much problems with the band, because she knew if she agreed with the band, I wouldn't pursue RNY (which I was leaning towards at the time). She told me in no uncertain terms that I couldn't have RNY. So that band was a good comprimise. So glad I chose the band too. Couldn't have asked for a better outcome or weight loss.

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Congrats ousooner on your awesome results. Your web site is great. I'll show my wife and I think that will help her become a full member of the "band."

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Joe, the more she knows, the less she will worry. Take her to every consult and for sure send her here.

Hugs and good luck!

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Also, having someone to play "devils advocate" isn't such a bad idea either! My DH did not think it was a good idea either but I soon found out his major concern was that I would think of it as a quick fix and not change my bad eating habits.

I am showing him that this is helping me change my wicked ways. I am certainly adopting a healthier lifestyle and he is very proud of me.

Good luck, you're lucky to have someone who cares so much about you.

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