Hubby Doesnt Like Me Now

[kisheswishes 4]

Hollyr,

Your subject was "Hubby Doesn't Like Me Now". Well the truth is, and please forgive the harshness of what I must say, he didn't like you before either. He couldn't have liked you, or loved you, because he wouldn't do things to hurt you if he did.

This is abuse...verbal and emotional abuse...and he is an abuser. He has abused your heart and your mind. If you had esteem issues he has only added to them. You don't deserve to be mistreated regardless of what you look like or what weight you are.

When God created each one of us he created something beautiful. Find the beautiful within yourself. Learn to see yourself the way God sees you. Learn to love yourself the way God loves you. You have great value and a wonderful testimony. You were spared death because you still have a purpose. Don't allow him or anyone else to keep you from your purpose and from being the best you that you can be. Just say WOW! Meaning, (w)ith (o)r (w)ithout him you can and will achieve your life's purpose.

[mrsplusamericajacksonville 21]

babes...........I am a plus sized beautiful queen and my hubby was Mr. Bahamas. When we first got together there were a lot of questions about how this beautiful man liked or wanted to marry me!! and now i have had my surgery and he is worried shitless.....all his insecurities are showing but all I say is "now you get to see what i went through"....I have always realized my worth and now he appreciates me more

[ontoanewlife 15]

Ok I gotta vent. I apologize ahead of time.

Sunday my husband tells me he doesn't like how fast I lost weight or how I look. (In a nutshell) says he liked me far and not used to me now. Ok hurt my feelings but I can see a small point. I have lost 84lbs six months tomorrow. I had horrible complications after surgery and just now eating small amounts.

Them tonight at the gym he points out to me a chic he thinks is hot and wants to meet. ( we have a unique relationship ). Let me just say I weigh about 40lbs more than her and she truly was not attractive. I told him my thoughts and now he is mad at me. For real mad. Like not talking to me.

I nearly died with this surgery. All I ever wanted was to be thin and attractive. He always looks at hot Chics which I can handle. But to tell me he doesn't like me now. I dunno what to say or do. At one time I would've eaten a bag of chips. Now I am just pissed

Good thing I see the shrink Thursday. He will earn his money.

Thanks for letting me vent. Gonna go cry now.

Sent from my iPhone using VST

Girl...

Get rid of that zero and get you a hero!!

None of it is positive for your self-esteem nor will it enhance your long term goals.

Guys like him do not change without their own long term stint with a shrink.

As someone else said "never settle".

I couldn't agree more!

[bigcountryab 278]

Ok I gotta vent. I apologize ahead of time.

Sunday my husband tells me he doesn't like how fast I lost weight or how I look. (In a nutshell) says he liked me far and not used to me now. Ok hurt my feelings but I can see a small point. I have lost 84lbs six months tomorrow. I had horrible complications after surgery and just now eating small amounts.

Them tonight at the gym he points out to me a chic he thinks is hot and wants to meet. ( we have a unique relationship ). Let me just say I weigh about 40lbs more than her and she truly was not attractive. I told him my thoughts and now he is mad at me. For real mad. Like not talking to me.

I nearly died with this surgery. All I ever wanted was to be thin and attractive. He always looks at hot Chics which I can handle. But to tell me he doesn't like me now. I dunno what to say or do. At one time I would've eaten a bag of chips. Now I am just pissed

Good thing I see the shrink Thursday. He will earn his money.

Thanks for letting me vent. Gonna go cry now.

Sent from my iPhone using VST

You are Hott! If he doesn't like how you look let me! Lol

[mzblaze36 92]

Honey let me just say this I'm doing this for me I'm not married but I am dating .. but if u dont like the new me he can hit that old door... Support is a major thing in a relationship. And I dont care what type of relationship you guys have. TO TELL U HE Don't LIKE U LIKE THAT THEN ATTEMPTS TO INTRODUCE YOU TO SOMEONE HE THINKS LOOK GOOD.. IS DISRESPECTFUL.

[Not Applicable 52]

Maybe you could sit down with him and explain how his comments made you feel. He may not even realize he hurt you. This might be an opportunity for you to start a conversation about what you both need from each other to feel supported and loved in your marriage.

[JerseyCityGal 231]

The way he is behaving is very disrespectful and quite frankly it doesn't matter if she is hot or not OR if you are fat or thin. That was a really nasty and low thing for him to do.

Do you really want a man who has your permission to do whatever he wants with whomever will let him who will then come back to you and treat you like that? I wouldn't. People tend to get what they ask for. Aim higher.

[lilyrose 33]

I'd kick that low life scum bag to the kerb ! You deserve soooooo much better. Xxxxxx

[SqueakyWheel&Ethyl 160]

Last time I checked, this website was a support group for everything that is involved in the lives of fellow Sleevers. If you can't, or flat out just don't WANT to be supportive of a fellow Sleever in pain, then MOVE ON and keep your criticism to yourself. I have NO DESIRE to support a spouse of a Sleever who is suffering. I don't need to hear the other side of the story. I LIVED IT MYSELF. You can't make this crap up! If my Sister-Sleever is asking for comfort, that's what she gets from me.

[#1Nana 5]

That is so hurtful, I was told that some partners will feel very insecure, because they are afraid of you leaving them, and intimidated by your weight loss, maybe him saying these things to you, which is so wrong, helps him to build a wall just in case, but it's no excuse for him to act like an A**hole! He needs some therapy!!!

Good luck and don't let others bring you down, you have come to far!!!

[Globetrotter 1,340]

Well, she has heard our advice, 3 pages of it, but you know how it is - people can advise and advise but until someone hits their personal rock bottom, they won't change the situation. This man has used her and abused her but until she's ready to make the change ... hopefully the therapist can help her see that he is a user and toxic to her recovery.

[MumtazG38 86]

this makes me very sad... It sounds like you settled for less than you wanted out of a relationship because you thought you didn't deserve better because of your looks... If you are with a man who treats you like that, he will treat you like that whether you are fat or skinny.

My husband treats me the same whether I'm skinny or fat, people told me sometimes what a good husband I had because he didn't care about the weight gain and loved me the same? I would think what the hell? so he's a saint for staying with me?

No he is a man who loves his wife and I love him and we made a commitment for life. To be side by side through all of our changes. Me being fat or him losing hair has no bearing on the core relationship.

Please know that you need to stop selling yourself short and you are much more than just your outward appearance.

^ This! My husband and I are the same! Thank goodness I didn't settle! We did break up once for a while (stupid teenager stuff on my part) and years after, I almost did settle for an a*****e!!! I'm so glad I waited, and re-found the perfect man!!! I don't know you enough to say much, but if this relationship doesn't make you think "I'm so happy I found the man of my dreams!!!"....than you're settling. You shouldn't be sad, fat, skinny, tall, short whatever else. I wish you the best hun!

[LI Gemini NY 607]

Well' date=' she has heard our advice, 3 pages of it, but you know how it is - people can advise and advise but until someone hits their personal rock bottom, they won't change the situation. This man has used her and abused her but until she's ready to make the change ... hopefully the therapist can help her see that he is a user and toxic to her recovery.[/quote']

Amen!

[ImLooznit 171]

SO what has been the outcome??? did she really want the advise???????????? Or did she settle for what HE gave HER?????????? I hope she moved on or WORKED OUT HER PROBLEMS!!!!!!!!!! Please let us know.................

[the-Russ 91]

(We have a unique relationship)

Your relationship is NOT unique, 50+% of marriages are setup to fail. How can you be secure if he is looking at other people and lusting. No one, woman or man, wants their spouse to think they are not hot OR kinda hot. You should look at your husband and think he is hot and want no other and your husband should think the same toward you.

Sorry you fell victim to silly crap on TV that even the actors don't adhere to. I hope you can put your life on a path for success.