How do you ease your spouse's worries?

[kaboom 13 0]

My husband is so worried about this surgery. When I first told him about my decision he sort of gave me a guilt trip. He said I should try exercising and dieting and all this stuff. Since I am a self pay he mentioned other options of course. I told him that my mind was made up and that I need support because I was scared enough.

Now that the time is getting closer he sees that the surgery is next week, he is so frightened. He stayed up last night starring at me because he said he was scared of what could happen or the complications maybe. Now I find myself trying to comfort him. My anxiety level has sky rocketed big time and now I have to worry about comforting my husband.

Anyone had this problem?

[kwhenrykerr 0]

I worried about my girl's WLS and she worried about mine. We are both much better off now and much happier. I still worry about her bypass and nutrition. I chose the band as being safer in the long run.

[beachgirl 2]

Just tell him the complication rate is like 1 percent and my surgeon has done over 7000 and never lost anyone. It's a very simple 45 min. surgery and I was in recovery 1 hour and then up and walking and flying home 24 hours later on a long flight. You'll be fine. Just draw close to each other and have faith. We will all keep you in our thoughts and prayers and you'll do just fine.

[kwhenrykerr 0]

Worry worry, what a waste of effort, but we all do it...

[HealthQuest 1]

Hey Kaboom, have hubby read some of these threads and maybe he will feel better. Just like you need support to have the surgery, he needs support because he is scared of losing you. I don't know what I can say differently to hubby to make both of you feel better, but if you would like I've had the surgery 2 weeks and would be glad to put any fears he may have to rest. Just send me a private message and I will give you a phone number to contact me.

P.S. ignore the weight shown. I've lost more I just don't know how much yet.

[kaboom 13 0]

Thank you I will keep that in mind! I can't wait already!:clap2:

[flabuless 18]

Kaboom...I was really worried at my partners reaction...he did the same thing as your hubby and couldn't understand why I didn't just do Jenny Craig or something...It was quite humiliating made me feel like I was lazy and trying to take the 'easy way out'. I tried to explain the complications of my condition (hypothyroidism) and explained why it was incredibly difficult to loose weigh on my own...despite my many attempts...Lapband is an everyday occurence for these surgeons in whose capable hands we put our lives...the complications are are very, very, very rare occurence.

Best wishes for your surgery

Becky

[juliegeraci 7]

If he is that nervous I would call my surgeons office and make an appointment for him to discuss the procedure with him. My doctor was happy to meet with both of us to discuss the surgery. It really helped displace any fears or regrets. Very well worth it. Good luck.

[kaboom 13 0]

Thanks! I am actually going to spend some time with the counselor at the doctor's office and I think I'm going to ask him to sit in and listen to the whole thing. We'll see what happens!