AussieLady 521 Posted May 5, 2013 I am so over hearing people simplify this major surgery by calling it a tool. My darling Dad, who died 2 weeks ago, had this surgery 30 years ago because he had a huge tumor in his stomach. I guess he was a test case for us fat people. He didn't choose to have 3/4 of his stomach removed like we do. He wasn't desperate to be thin or want to wear a bikini or want to be like his friends or have blood pressure or diabetes problems, he hade a healthy diet and exercise regime, he wasn't lazy or the hundred other reasons we all claim to be the best reasons in the world for us to have this surgery. He had this surgery to save his life, if he didn't he would have died. I had this surgery to save my life and I am so over this disrespectful simplification of this major life saving surgery by calling it a tool. A hammer, drill, screwdriver, saw and jackhammer are tools. This is major surgery! Calling it a tool just makes it seem like Weight-watchers or Jenny Craig for people who have no idea what they are getting themselves into. For example, why don't we talk more about the fact that if you get bowel cancer after you have been sleeved you are doomed to die because we don't have any excess stomach to replace the cancerous part of our bowel. Oh. And should we get stomach cancer then say goodbye because we are all left with the minimum amount of stomach we need to live. I don't want to be over-dramatic, but a TOOL, that's misleading and insulting. 8 sharonintx, Aquevedo92, belladona and 5 others reacted to this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
MichiganChic 3,262 Posted May 5, 2013 Aussie, so sorry to hear about the recent loss of your dad. I agree, this is a big ol' surgery, and more importantly, it's a life changer...it can be good or bad, depending on how you adjust to it and manage it. 1 TES reacted to this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
makemyownluck 785 Posted May 5, 2013 I completely agree that calling this a tool is oversimplifying the surgery. But if you don't call it that, people tend to think this is a miracle surgery that requires no effort on their part. It is a major surgery, one that could kill you. I had my surgery on Thursday and one of the other patients died on the table. My heart rate slowed to 40 with my bp being 80/40. I'm thankful I made it through, but it could have just as easily been that my heart stopped. I didn't consider these possibilities too much when I was pre-op! Now I'm just thankful to be alive and that every day is getting better. But yes, there are many risk factors involved with this, few of which were discussed. Patients want to lose weight, surgeons want to make money, and while they try to minimize complications, the fact is that fat people are very, very risky surgical patients. I'm glad to be one of the lucky ones. 10 soonerorlater, Arts137, ProudGrammy and 7 others reacted to this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
MichiganChic 3,262 Posted May 5, 2013 I had my surgery on Thursday and one of the other patients died on the table. My heart rate slowed to 40 with my bp being 80/40. I'm thankful I made it through, but it could have just as easily been that my heart stopped. I didn't consider these possibilities too much when I was pre-op! Now I'm just thankful to be alive and that every day is getting better. the fact is that fat people are very, very risky surgical patients. I'm glad to be one of the lucky ones. Wow, that's scary! You hit the nail on the head, fat people have higher surgical risk, in general. So sad someone died on the table! When you see it first hand, it really does give a whole new meaning, doesn't it? I just don't think there is any way to communicate to people that while the overall risk is low, when you fall into the 1% category, it's suddenly 100% YOU! I'm an RN, have worked in surgery, and fully understood all of it, yet, when I decided to do this, even I kind of glossed over that fact. I'm also very thankful to be one of the lucky ones. Glad you are OK, too. 3 T'snewstart, MeMeMEEE and makemyownluck reacted to this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
aquitenonnymouse 206 Posted May 5, 2013 I totally agree with Makemyownluck. I call it a tool to try to explain to people that having surgery wasn't a magic fix-all. 8 NewSetOfCurves, kimbernada, lilbearzmom and 5 others reacted to this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
axd0424 33 Posted May 5, 2013 Amen sister. I hate the word tool too. It's not a tool. It's removal of most of your stomach! 1 sharonintx reacted to this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
pottergirl 261 Posted May 5, 2013 Sorry aussie.... recently lost my beloved father to a long illness......so sorry you lost your dad....((hugs)) i guess we call it "a tool" because it's not the end all cure to obesity. i understand your frustration over the phrase...... 1 TES reacted to this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
SerendipityHappens 1,594 Posted May 5, 2013 I 100% agree that it's a major surgery and we should be thinking of ALL the possible risks and complications prior to doing it. So many lives have been changed because of it. Still, I'm going to call it a "tool". Just like obtaining regular exercise is a "tool". Just like obtaining counseling will give you some mental "tools" to employ to help you make better food choices and avoid emotional eating. The point of calling it a tool is to drive home the point that it IS NOT a magic pill... and it WILL NOT lose the weight for you..... It is still only a tool that we can choose to use or not to use.... and getting the sleeve is only ONE part of the equation. Granted, it's a tool that we have risked our lives to obtain.... it's a tool that if used properly can add many years of health to our lives... but it's still a tool... and to me to hear it called that in no way detracts from the gravity of the surgery. It's all about context.. if someone is saying.. "it's just a tool.. no big deal" when they're contemplating surgery.. then yeah.. they definitely are looking at it wrong.. but when you've got people saying "Remember, this surgery won't FIX you.. it's only one tool that will help you on the journey"... that's a completely different context. 29 Ms.AntiBand, Arts137, karenb4729 and 26 others reacted to this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
T'snewstart 251 Posted May 5, 2013 Aussie so sorry for our loss. I can see why hearing that catch phrase would be a source of frustration for you. You have lived this surgery from a completely different prospective than most. I can respect your view and will consider that before ever using that phrase again. Respectfully, Tina 1 pottergirl reacted to this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
AussieLady 521 Posted May 5, 2013 I 100% agree that it's a major surgery and we should be thinking of ALL the possible risks and complications prior to doing it. So many lives have been changed because of it. Still' date=' I'm going to call it a "tool". Just like obtaining regular exercise is a "tool". Just like obtaining counseling will give you some mental "tools" to employ to help you make better food choices and avoid emotional eating. The point of calling it a tool is to drive home the point that it IS NOT a magic pill... and it WILL NOT lose the weight for you..... It is still only a tool that we can choose to use or not to use.... and getting the sleeve is only ONE part of the equation. Granted, it's a tool that we have risked our lives to obtain.... it's a tool that if used properly can add many years of health to our lives... but it's still a tool... and to me to hear it called that in no way detracts from the gravity of the surgery. It's all about context.. if someone is saying.. "it's just a tool.. no big deal" when they're contemplating surgery.. then yeah.. they definitely are looking at it wrong.. but when you've got people saying "Remember, this surgery won't FIX you.. it's only one tool that will help you on the journey"... that's a completely different context.[/quote'] I don't know whether you have been sleeved or not but the facts are that exercising is exercising, counseling is counseling and this surgery is not a tool. When you have it, if done properly, you lose weight. You couldnt possibly not lose weight when you can only eat half a cup of food three times a day. It's not a tool, it's a major surgery. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Ms.AntiBand 2,984 Posted May 5, 2013 Sorry about your dads passing .. It's difficult and my prayers are with you and your family. 2 gibson_girl and pottergirl reacted to this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
makemyownluck 785 Posted May 5, 2013 Wow, that's scary! You hit the nail on the head, fat people have higher surgical risk, in general. So sad someone died on the table! When you see it first hand, it really does give a whole new meaning, doesn't it? I just don't think there is any way to communicate to people that while the overall risk is low, when you fall into the 1% category, it's suddenly 100% YOU! I'm an RN, have worked in surgery, and fully understood all of it, yet, when I decided to do this, even I kind of glossed over that fact. I'm also very thankful to be one of the lucky ones. Glad you are OK, too. It was scary learning that someone died... my parents were in the waiting room and my surgery had already gone over the "one and a half hours" quote my surgeon gave them. I was about 3 hours in surgery (not sure why, surgeon said everything went well), and while my parents were waiting for news, they had to witness this family hearing the worst and dealing with the shock and surprise of it. Very overwhelming. I felt guilty because all I could think was "Thank god it wasn't me" ... I think lots of pre-op'ers focus on the weight loss aspect ONLY, and while that is the desired goal of having this surgery, you simply MUST consider all the alternatives. As someone who had gall bladder surgery at a weight this high with no complications and who has never had heart problems, I did NOT anticipate that I would have bradycardia and hypotension after surgery, even with pre-op clearance, you just can't predict how your body will handle surgery. It's a life changer, and not always for the better! I am fortunate, my bp and heart rate went back to normal 2nd day post op. I'm so grateful for that!! I hope it all stays normal! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
AussieLady 521 Posted May 5, 2013 Sorry about your dads passing .. It's difficult and my prayers are with you and your family. Thank you. He had a good long life, but it is always difficult to lose a family member. 1 Ms.AntiBand reacted to this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
No game 14,437 Posted May 5, 2013 Ok! Ok! Wendy no more tools! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
AussieLady 521 Posted May 5, 2013 It was scary learning that someone died... my parents were in the waiting room and my surgery had already gone over the "one and a half hours" quote my surgeon gave them. I was about 3 hours in surgery (not sure why' date=' surgeon said everything went well), and while my parents were waiting for news, they had to witness this family hearing the worst and dealing with the shock and surprise of it. Very overwhelming. I felt guilty because all I could think was "Thank god it wasn't me" ... I think lots of pre-op'ers focus on the weight loss aspect ONLY, and while that is the desired goal of having this surgery, you simply MUST consider all the alternatives. As someone who had gall bladder surgery at a weight this high with no complications and who has never had heart problems, I did NOT anticipate that I would have bradycardia and hypotension after surgery, even with pre-op clearance, you just can't predict how your body will handle surgery. It's a life changer, and not always for the better! I am fortunate, my bp and heart rate went back to normal 2nd day post op. I'm so grateful for that!! I hope it all stays normal![/quote'] I'm really glad your recovery is going well and am sorry you had such a scary experience. 1 makemyownluck reacted to this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites