Any caregivers out there?

Carlene · December 22, 2006

Your MIL plays golf at 87? She's going to live forever.

LOL....no, my husband plays golf 4 or 5 days a week. His mother walks two miles every day, though. And unfortunately, DH isn't much help when it comes to his mom. I do all the cooking, the laundry, etc. I get to take her to the doctor, the dentist, the grocery store, the pharmacy, etc. I get to mend all the clothes that she won't throw out when they become threadbare, in spite of the fact that she has a closet bursting with clothes she's never worn. And because she is hearing impaired but won't wear her hearing aids, she can't carry on a conversation with the doctor, so I get to stay in the exam room thru her pelvic, her anal check, and her breast exam. I know my MIL much better than most people know theirs....LOL

kwhenrykerr · December 22, 2006

10 years after death ended my caregiver duites and I still feel that it was "The Best of Times and The Worst of Times". I treasure some of the worst moments. Let me share one with you.

I was tired, exhuasted both mind and body. I have cared fo my dad for years, the last 3 years have seen his abilty to care for himself fade. I was now to the point that the care was 24/7. I was determinded to grant his wish not to be "put away". It was late one night and I checked on him. He had soiled himself again. I was temped to let him sleep, but it was a mess. I knew that he did not have any control over this. He was completely bed ridden, on a feeding tube and not very alive.

I started to clean him up and change the bedding and he became alert. He was unable to talk so I was talking to him, not to myself only as he was able to respond a little. I am sure that he could tell how tired I was. I recall telling him what a mess he was. I ask him did he understand? I got a little nod of the head. This made me feel ashamed that I had ask the question. He was complely unable to control this.

I contuniued to do my job in silence for a few minutes then I had to ask him. "did you ever do this for me or was it always mom?"

I was ready to quit, all my remaining energy was gone. His answer was a grin and nod of the head to say yes. It was like a light came on. I had renewed energy, I cared for him to the end.

It has always been one of the best moments we had togather. Just a grin and little nod...

Carlene · December 22, 2006

10 years after death ended my caregiver duites and I still feel that it was "The Best of Times and The Worst of Times". I treasure some of the worst moments. ...

What a touching story! I feel the same way. I miss my mom, but she just wasn't much fun to be around those last few years.