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My journey begins.....



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I'm not sure where to post this, but I am hoping I chose the right forum!!

I have been heavy all my life. I remember I was the bigger 'kid' in all of my elementary classes and I just wanted to be 'skinny' like the other girls. At one point in time I remember one summer my mom had me try Slim Fast. Back in the day it was NASTY!!!! That didn't last long with me. But, then again I grew up on a farm where it was meat, potato, veggie, bread and dessert every night. When I graduated high school I believe I was around 230 lbs then. It sucked, I tried everything I could, but I just started to gain weight. So fast forward a few years. I met my ex husband late 2002. I weighed 270 lbs at the time we met and was actually losing weight (I had started taking Metformin for my Insulin Resistance) but, I started to gain a little at a time and couldn't figure it out. On the day I got married (4 yrs after we met) I weight 335 lbs I believe. But, I tried to lose weight, joined WW and well didn't have his support so that was an epic fail. What I didn't realize the entire time I was with him was I was stress eating. I hit my all time high 354 lbs. And, my marriage became abusive. He was not only physically abusive, he was mentally, emotionally, and verbally abusive. I lost all self confidence. To this day if someone calls me beautiful, I just cringe and tell them whatever I don't believe them. I mean, it has gotten a little better, but all the emotional scars will never heal.

Why surgery? Will it fix my outside looks and my screwed up mind? No, but I want a healthier life. And ok, I don't want to lie, it would be nice to accidently run into the ex and say HA HA HA!! But, I try to avoid him (pretty successful in the last 4 yrs!). I want to be able to be around for my future nieces and nephews. I want to be around to help my parents as they get older (I'm the closest one out of the 3 of us) and I want to be able to get the bike out of my shed and go on bike rides in the evenings or run a 5K every now and then. But, I want to get off the medication as well!

I look forward to meeting new friends on here and having the support of each and every one of you!! I know I have my family, but it's comforting to have 'friends' that have been through it!

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God bless you Honey! You have been through so much!! We are here for you through this amazing and wonderful journey to a better and healthier life. You are doing this all for the right reasons. Best of luck and use this forum for good advice and support!

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