Newbie-Need advise to calm Mom

[blownaway36 0]

Hi All, 'm a newbie here, live in Scarb, work in Markham, have a surgery date of Jan 17. I'm 41, and my mom think I'm out of my mind.

I be at the TLBC. I've made an exta consutaltion appointment to include dear 'ol mom, as she seems to have more questions than I.

I realize that she is concerned purely out of love, so I'm hoping that she will feel as I do after 'our' consultation, put her mind at ease.

I've found this website to be extemely informative.

Can anyone tell me if stitched need to be removed after surgery, or are they dissolvable, that's one question I forgot to ask.

If there is any other advise that anyone can offer that would put moms mind at ease, I would surely welcome your commments.

~DB

[Gaffer 1]

Perhaps tell her that there is a greater chance of you dieing from things like heart disease, stroke, cancer or complications with diabetes if you dont have the surgery. Heart disease & stroke are proven to kill millions every year.

Gaffer

[neenagh 0]

Hi Blownaway, Welcome!!!

Your mom will probably feel better once she asks her questions at the consult. Give her any literature you may have, and you may want to print up anything on the net you find explaining just how safe, easy and reversible the surgery is. Make sure that she knows that your not getting your innards rearranged (i.e. bypass or stapling). Tell her that this surgery is the gold standard in europe. Tell her about all the happy, happy people who post here!!!

I had internal stitches that dissovled (i think), and just steri strips over the actual incisions.

Let us know how things go, ok?

[r2ht4u 0]

I didnt have any stitches just those steri-strips. Shoot I went in and he started my surgery at 8am and I was home at 230 that afternoon anddddddd walked around the block as soon as I got home!

[CLOE 0]

Hi Blownaway and Welcome!!'

I am also 41. My mother has been supportive of me, but only after she asked a thousand questions. I think it's a great idea to have her talk to the doc. TLBC is an amazing place to have your surgery. I didnt go there, but there are many, many of us on here that have. Your in great hands. As for your mother, give her some time. Everytime I see my mom, I give her an update on how many pounds I've lost so far, and she gets so excited for me. Today I was able to tell her that so far I have lost 82 lbs!!!! She was thrilled!!!

Best of Luck!!

[Yoda 0]

Howdy Blownaway...and yes...welcome to our Canuck Corner.

I was done at TLBC...no stitches to remove....they'll go away on their own.

Your mom should have a lot of her concerns alleviated after the consult....she probably just doesn't understand the procedure nor how common it is in other countries (civilized countries!).

My mom lives on the West Coast (I'm just north of TO) so it made it easier in a way that she is so far away. I didn't tell her beforehand...but only because she was going to be in Europe for a month (my surgery was while she was gone); so I didn't want to tell her before she left so that she wouldn't be fretting about me (I knew she would have). But once she got back, that was the first thing I told her....but before I could give her a chance to say anything or comment I told her all about the procedure and what it was about so that she wouldn't get it mixed up with RNY or anything like that. She was VERY VERY supportive and happy for me. Like Cloe, I keep her posted on my weight loss and she is thrilled for me.

Good luck!!

[flabuless 18]

Hi Blownaway...Welcome

I think you are doing the right thing by including your mom in on a consult with the doc...she might have a lot more peace once her questions get answered...but regardless I suggest you listen to her concerns...weigh them and then decide what is best for YOU and your health..

:xena_banana: becky

[green 6]

Hi Blownaway, I am another one who was done by the TLBC gang, the folks who will soon be working on you. Have no fear. This is a very kind and competent group who will be involved with your care.

The stitches do dissolve by themselves. I believe that they use surgical glue. Over the incisions they place steri-strips and these will fall off in due course over the next month to six weeks if I remember correctly. I found that the pain from the surgery was easily controlled by the pain medication which they prescribe and I ended up only using half of my prescription. The worst pain came from gas!

I spent the three days following the surgery relaxing in bed, reading and napping with the cat. This was a very, very pleasant time for me. I loved having a good reason to lie in bed, I love reading, and the demerol made everything just that much more luxurious. On the fourth day I got up, had a bath, put on day-wear, and was a more or less fully functioning old bat!

As for the post-op diet, I found it surprisingly easy to stick with this even though I did go on a pre-op farewell dining tour! I think that one of the things that made it easier was that the regimen called for so many little Snacks. It seemed as though I was always hoovering down a little Soup or broth or whatever because it was either mealtime or snacktime.

Certainly the weight began to come off during those post-op weeks. It was my husband who first noticed and said something to me.

I do think that it is a good idea for you to take your mother down to TLBC for an info session and hopefully this will ease her mind about the procedure. Should your mother remain opposed to the surgery you may find yourself between a rock and a hard place. Good luck, girl.

[blownaway36 0]

Thanks so much for all the replies, advise and support.

I really appreciate it.

My 2nd consult with my mom is this coming Tuesday, I'm hoping to firm up in my mind that all will go well once she's more involved and has a better understanding.

Once again thanks.

[Wheezy 0]

I didn't tell my mom, it was a personal choice. I didn't want her to worry, I just told her I was going on a diet. My weight loss has been very slow so that made things easy as far as explaining things

[blownaway36 0]

Once again thank for all of your replies. I went to the meeting with Nisrine, my Mom and stayed for the pre op seminar.

It was quite interesting. I recored the entire evening, I have re listened to it a few times, (it was eaiser than writing things down and/or trying to remember stuff)

I was impressed my almost everything, except for the nutrionist, I found that she was quite preachy, and spoke down to us, really as though we were children, when it came to the actual diets that we will be following "a low fat low carb dairy based diet" didn't really tell me too much.

(I created a new post for help on this subject.)

My Mom still has some pretty good concerns, but...she's decided that there will be no christmas presents for me since she's going to finance it interest free...(lucky me my mom can't stand the thought of paying interest!!!) I live with my sis and I WILL NOT be telling her.

I won't get into that aspect of my life, but I figure I will tell her I'm on a nother crazy diet and let her go off on me about how I always go over board, and all I have to do is stop being exsessive. I hope I can get through those few weeks with out any issues from her.

So at this point, I suppose this time next month will be my turn...Yikes very nervous.

How long did it take you all to get the req's for the pre op medical test, I don't have those yet, and would like to get those overwith as well.

Thanks for letting me vent.

Donna Bee