Ugh, ugh, ugh!!

[Alexandra 55]

This week has been a complete derail as far as my taking care of myself goes. To make a long story short, my husband is recovering from surgery for testicular cancer. He'll be fine, we're sure, but starting this past Monday it's been a pretty weird week.

The first two days were pretty much worry, then while waiting around during surgery I hit the tray of gourmet Cookies. That was the beginning of the end. We got the diagnosis on Tuesday evening and while we were relieved, since then I've been experiencing an absolute orgy comfort eating. I spent a lot of money at Trader Joe's on Desserts and Snacks, without even trying to stop myself.

Yesterday, after a normal, nutritious Breakfast and lunch, I had: popcorn, LOTS of dark-chocolate-covered raisins, a caramel-pecan turtle (220 calories RIGHT THERE), three oatmeal-cranberry cookies under two or three scoops of vanilla ice cream, and four or five mandarin oranges. Oh, and for dinner I had two "tacos" which were made of tortillas, ground beef, melted cheese and sour cream.

Now I feel like absolute shit. and even worse because the extra energy that being worried gave me is gone. This was NOT a good thing to happen when I have no fill at all.

Blech, blech, and triple blech. Today is another day, and I really have to get a handle on this. Michael is going to be fine, and he's about 80% recovered from the surgery so I don't even have to pull extra duty anymore to make up for his laying on the couch. I have no excuses, and have to somehow regain control of my hand-to-mouth behavior.

Ugh. Thanks for letting me vent. Fill is scheduled for 12/14 and now I have more work to do. Moving right along...

[lianna 3]

I am glad that your husband is recovering well and that at least that part of the worry is alleviated. Hang in there the best you can until your fill, it is really all you can do right now! Dont beat yourself up over raisins and Cookies, in the grander scheme of things it really isnt that important. Just dust yourself off and try to have a better day!

[threebeauties 0]

You have been dealing with a very stressful situation. Best of luck to your husband!

So what, you fell off the "bandwagon". You obviously own your actions, otherwise you wouldn't have posted. I am very sure you are a different person than before you were banded. I am willing to bet, if you are like me, the old you would have continued the bad behavior for days, weeks or months. You messed up and I know you will get back on track before too much damage is done.

Best of luck to you. I know you will get back on track!!

[juliegeraci 7]

Alexandra, glad your husband is okay. The only thing I can say is get rid of all the junk that is left in your house. Recommit to the band and go get a fill. That is a lot of food to consume. Hopefully in the future with a fill you will be left with just 1 taco and not the rest. Good luck.

[DevilMayKare 1]

the Ultimate Truth....

the reality of 'comfort eating' is ILLUSION..

Yeah, that's getting posted on the fridge!

[Alexandra 55]

Yeah, that's getting posted on the fridge!

Abso-effing-LUTELY!!

Thanks, everyone, for your words. It's SO TRUE what Jack says. Today I'm still overdoing it, a little, but have managed to do so on healthy foods (so far). And I'm busier today, which helps. I also managed to get to the gym and 5-miles-on-the-bike later, I'm feeling almost human!!

[deckedout 0]

Alexandra,

I too have gone through the cancer thing with my hubby. He has been clear now for 7 years, but I remember the stress very clearly. Don't be so hard on yourself! When we face a stressful situtation like this one, it is nice to feel we have control of something, so eating is something we can at least be in control over, even if it is too much eating. If everything went as quickly with your husband's diagnoses as it did with my husband's you probably haven't even had a chance to take a breath.

Now that things are returning to a more even keel, take some time for yourself. The focus has certainly been elsewhere for a while here. I spent a lot of time reading everything I could find about testicular cancer, which helped me understand things better, and time to myself just walking and thinking about things. Of course, I overate, but it was before banding.

It is great that you are getting a fill which will help with some of that. But, don't be so hard on yourself. Sometimes, we just need to eat! Anyway, I'll pray for your hubby and you. And make sure to do something for yourself that you really enjoy, it helps to reduce the stress, which will help with the overeating.

[vinesqueen 2]

((((hugs))))

it's just a minor setback, you at least know that your band will work once you get it filled.

I'm so sorry to hear about your husband. So Very sorry.

[GayleTX 1]

Beauty of the band.....it's there waiting for you when you are ready! You need to get a fill soon as you can and you'll be good to go again!!

[flabuless 18]

As Scarlet (Gone with the wind) puts it so eloquently...Tomorro is another day...

:xena_banana: Becky

[badmadmama 0]

Alexandra, my husband had brain cancer two years ago, so I totally sympathize. And when you are sitting at home taking care of someone, it's so hard NOT to eat.

I had a bad month. My band is very tight, so I'm not eating much at meals. So I gave myself permission to eat Cereal (ended up eating half the box) and crackers (ate WAY too many). So I'm done with that, but there is still Christmas to get through.

If you like tacos, you can make them with fat-free beef (or ground turkey, you can't taste the difference with the spices), fat free cheese and fat free sour cream. We eat them all the time.

Hugs, Eileen

[*susan* 1,709]

Alexandra, I am so sorry to hear about your husband. My cousin went through testicular cancer 8 years ago and hasn't had any problems since. It sounds like your hubby is doing well and my prayers are with him.

As far as the comfort eating, we all have our times. But, as others have mentioned, when you are ready, your band is right there waiting for you. It sounds like you are getting back on track, which is great.

[transformer 1]

Hi there!

Receiving that diagnosis must have been the hardest thing you and your husband have ever had to deal with! I am thrilled that his prognosis is good! You will get back on track, as evidenced by your trip to the gym--good for you!

I, too, get an attack of the Munchies Monster whenever I get stressed. I'm going to have to figure out how to replace food with something else during a stressful time. This is where fixing our brains comes into it. Maybe we could take up a hobby like some type of needlework that would keep our hands full instead of eating food? ? I don't know...this is a tough one! :help:

[Kat817 19]

Alex, my DH also had serious health problems this last several months, so I can relate to the stress eating. The ONLY thing that saved me, was his landed him in the hospital...and they were remodeling, so I had very few options of things to eat. In fact one night my DD and I went all over the hospital, (which is only 5 floors) and could not find one single vending machine with chocolate in it!!!

Then my Dad was trying to be sweet so be brought donuts to the hospital---the one food that I PB on EVERY time!! So...through forces other than my own, I survived the mindless gnawing of food....if it had been there, I guarantee you I would have eaten every bite!

You will relax now that his health seems assured (praises be!!!). and you will get back on line, we are always here ready to apply boot to butt if need be!!!

Good health to you both!

Kat

[Iluvharleys 15]

Sorry to hear about your husband and your bad week. Don't worry, one day won't cause that many problems. It sounds like you are on your way back to normal again! Good luck to both of you!