Serious question seeks serious answer!

[momfromjersey22 403]

I am very curious as to why BBWs don't like to date larger men? One time in my search for an answer I came across a woman who told me that 2 big people don't seem right. Whatever the hell that means. So now that I am on this site I thought I'd ask. I really am wanting to get a serious answer. This just isn't a couple of women I've met or just something that has happened to me but I've noticed a trend of this everywhere. Hell a lot of dating sites have lots of bbws wanting tall slender men or something of the sort. I've always loved larger women yet I've never dated one. Makes no sense to me. Thanks in advance.

I prefer larger men. I've dated average sized men, muscular men, and larger men, honestly it doesn't matter, I base my opinion on personality.

[Daveo 485]

I actually find myself attracted to larger men. It's harder to meet them than you might think! And guess what? Most of them prefer to date thinner women.

Really what part of Cali! lol

[Daveo 485]

Well you ladies are rare, most don't like big men.

[onesleevedmamma 178]

As a BBW I am attracted to men with a little weight but not large men. For me personally it had to do with my self image (as stated in other responses) but in a different way. I didn't like myself fat and always wanted to be the person I feel like I am in my heart.... active and healthy. Being with a large man probably means that won't happen if he's happy with his weight and doesn't want to change it. I also want to do activities like sightseeing and museums, etc and it's hard with someone who may have trouble doing those things.

Also, while sex isn't everything, my excess weight makes it challenging to fit together as it is with a lesser weight man....my ex husband gained a large stomach and sex was nearly not worth it because of the challenge. (We divorced for other reasons completely)

Btw, we are adults and mature enough to answer this questions with reality

Sex is important for some of us. The almost certainly of not having it is a turn off for me. Why start a relationship when the odds are against important parts of a relationship for me? Is it shallow? Some might think so. But I look at it like I finally know what I want in life and am looking out for my needs for once and that is Ok.

Hope that helps. It is a sad situation that it happens though.

Ps. My ex husband told me to gain weight because I was unattractive when I had lost some during my marriage so it goes both ways

[onesleevedmamma 178]

I also wonder if stereotypes of large people as "lazy or depressed or others" come into play. Even subconsciously. I know that's not correct but humans tend to look for mates who can provide for families. .. men who can protect or women who look like they can bear children.

It's not a theory I'd stake a ton on but research has shown such tendencies

[Chanti_ 27]

Each and every person has his/her own personal choices. I don't have an answer for you and hope you find the answer. BTW, does it really matter now....your on your way to a thinner healthier you. Congrats on your weight loss.......

it kinda does matter to me. my taste happens to be the larger ladies and uh it just sucks that I am kinda shunned away. thank you and yes the weight loss is very awesome and I have thinned quite a bit but my mind is still that bigger guy who has just a little bit of trouble with the ladies. shyness is an understatement lol

As a big woman, I can tell you that you may be shy but often so are we. I never think of myself as attractive to a man. You feel shunned but I know that for me in the past and even now at times when my self esteem is in the crapper, I am never able to take interest from a man as sincere. I think I shut down a lot of potentials because I didn't believe that they could really be interested in me. A lifetime of being the fat girl and my walls are high and thick. So if you are attracted to large women you gotta know that we often come with enough baggage to fill a semi. I think your best bet is to start out trying to be a friend and don't come on too strong too fast. Have patience, if you want a relationship your gonna need it. As to your original post I think physical attraction to a specific body type like BBW or SBM (skinny bald men in my case) is hard wired. You like what you like.

[newmebithebypass 713]

I know I am late to this thread but I'm a bbw and I love big men husky or bigger are the guys I go after I love football and nothing is hotter than having adult time with a defensive lineman. My hubby for example is 5'10 340