buplee 556 Posted April 24, 2013 I may be alone in this but I have been looking at the unhealthy foods people eat while shopping in the mall, or while out socially in a restaurant. I was in the mall and saw an overweight man sitting at a table eating a triple burger, large fries, and what looked like a vat of soda. It really angered me. I thought to myself- how could he do that to himself? Please sound off and let me know if I am being crazy and judgmental or if you have had the same thought. 1 Carol Watts reacted to this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
joatsaint 2,814 Posted April 24, 2013 I have had the same thoughts, but it immediately dawned on me that I WAS that guy just a few months ago. So I try real hard not to judge anyone else since I don't know their situation or motivations. Why hate someone because of their eating habits, when I can focus my criticism on more meaningful things like race or nationality. 4 No game, Kimmy1813, MrsG and 1 other reacted to this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
HoosierGirl 780 Posted April 24, 2013 YES! I thought I was alone in this. But a few months ago the fat person eating the burger and fries -THAT WAS ME! Now when I see huge amounts of food for business lunches or family holidays, I just think 'Why does everyone eat all this junk?' Clearly, I have changed. My attitude towards food has changed too. But I never want to be a person who forgets how hard it was before I had the sleeve. I never want to judge someone who is struggling the same way I used to struggle. 7 LMFAO575, loseitsoon, MrsG and 4 others reacted to this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
vsginnj 415 Posted April 24, 2013 I learned a saying at an A.A. Meeting when someone new Comes in totally ravaged by the effects of their drinking, " but for the grace of God there go I " in my experience works fine here as well. 4 cerenatee, Kimmy1813, No game and 1 other reacted to this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
cerenatee 90 Posted April 24, 2013 I would think you would be more along the lines of "Poor guy. Wish he could have the surgery I had. Wish he had a chance." but everyone is different. Society has programmed us to think that eating better is about will power, even when we KNOW it's not. So now, after your sleeve you're eating right so it's easy to overlook the fact that you needed 80% of your stomach and 65% of your hunger hormone removed to do it. You can also get caught up in the self-righteousness because you are extending some effort to eat right but that effort only comes after having major help. If you remember that it took the skills of surgeons, anesthesiologist, nutritionists, psychiatrists, and risking your life to have the "will power" you do now, you'll look on others with more grace and gratitude than judgment and self-righteousness. 4 need2bthin!, melross1, HoosierGirl and 1 other reacted to this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
No game 14,437 Posted April 24, 2013 When I see people like that for the most part I feel sadness.. most of the time I see the sadness in their eyes and body language.. I was them, they are me.. 5 Kimmy1813, mysleevemylife, LMFAO575 and 2 others reacted to this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
thinathart 197 Posted April 24, 2013 I pay more attention now too...but it's only because less than 6 months ago I was that person. It amazes me how much I was able to consume at one time pre-sleeve. I'm thankful everyday I was given this tool to help keep me in check with a healthier lifestyle. 2 HoosierGirl and Kimmy1813 reacted to this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
buplee 556 Posted April 24, 2013 I also pay more attention to what people eat and remember that was me. I can't believe I used to eat that way. I wanted to make sure I was not being judgmental, I guess I don't understand the rationale to be unhealthy anymore. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
MrsG 329 Posted April 24, 2013 YES! I thought I was alone in this. But a few months ago the fat person eating the burger and fries -THAT WAS ME! Now when I see huge amounts of food for business lunches or family holidays' date=' I just think 'Why does everyone eat all this junk?' Clearly, I have changed. My attitude towards food has changed too. But I never want to be a person who forgets how hard it was before I had the sleeve. I never want to judge someone who is struggling the same way I used to struggle.[/quote'] Very well said! I never want to forget either! My views on food have changed too. It grosses me out to see how much ppl can and do eat in one sitting. And I used to be there! Crazy. 1 HoosierGirl reacted to this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Carol Watts 67 Posted April 24, 2013 I may be alone in this but I have been looking at the unhealthy foods people eat while shopping in the mall, or while out socially in a restaurant. I was in the mall and saw an overweight man sitting at a table eating a triple burger, large fries, and what looked like a vat of soda. It really angered me. I thought to myself- how could he do that to himself? Please sound off and let me know if I am being crazy and judgmental or if you have had the same thought. I have the same thoughts since surgery Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
buplee 556 Posted April 24, 2013 My wife said the best thing for our family was for me to get sleeved. My mother has always been overweight and suffers from high blood pressure, insulin dependent diabetes, and high cholesterol. Since I was sleeved, she has lost 14lbs in the last month. It now bothers me to big people eating huge quantities of food, but to each their own. I am happy it is not me any longer. I won't judge them but it is hard for me to see it none the less. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
mistysj 1,940 Posted April 24, 2013 I think it's like people who join a new religion or stop smoking. It's in the front of their minds so they see it everywhere and can't stop talking about it, trying to convince everyone around them. I think it comes from a good place but it just never works and comes across so judgmental. Put yourself in the overeater's shoes and think how you would react to someone saying those things to you. You might get angry or be depressed for days. It might reinforce to you that you're a loser because you can't stop. It probably won't be a call to positive action, though. 2 adargie and Kimmy1813 reacted to this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
MrsG 329 Posted April 25, 2013 I agree. We've been there and had people gawk at us which is even more important to show compassion. Everyone's story is different. Maybe they've given up or don't care or maybe they don't have insurance or money to be able to have surgery. Overweight people already get the looks and judgement from others who have never battled their weight. The last thing they need is someone who used to be like them looking down on them also. If you see someone eating like that, instead of getting angry stop and thank God you were blessed enough to have lived long enough to have such a wonderful surgery. One that gives us a second chance at life. 2 Kimmy1813 and cerenatee reacted to this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
jenniesue 81 Posted April 25, 2013 I get angry and ashamed... at myself. It's actually eye opening because I realize that is what I looked like not too long ago. So, I get ashamed of my old self. Though, I rarely ate that much in public. I was more of a secret eater. ~Jenn 1 Kimmy1813 reacted to this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Nicolanz 1,484 Posted April 25, 2013 Honestly, I never notice or care how other people eat. 1 cerenatee reacted to this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites