My insensitive coworker

[SeriouslyChange 319]

I just started this job about a month ago. All 3 of us girls were talking about weight. So I tell them: I'm 230. One asks: how much were you at your highest? I reply 330. And she says: "what? We're you constant eating? Holy f**k! You ate us both HAHAHA" referring to her and my other coworker.

I'm really upset by her comments. But my company is family owned and I know that I gain nothing by complaining. What should I do? I don't want to lose my job but I am still upset...

[TES 858]

I'm very sorry that this happened to you. Her comments were very insensitive. I'm also very sorry that you lived through a sexual assault.

Congratulations on your amazing weight loss.

[rebecca_dsu 241]

I don't know how you feel about confrontation, or how much you see these gals, but if it were me, I'd speak my feelings at some point (better than eating them).

A conversation when the time is right along the lines of "Hey, remember the other day when we were talking about weight an you made the comment about how I must of had been eating constantly to get up to 330 lbs, etc... well I need to say that that really hurt my feelings. I was dealing with a lot of stuff in my life, and food became my way to cope, just as some use alcohol and drugs. It was a ruff patch in my life. But your words really hurt me."

Now she might respond rudely, or maybe, just maybe she'll apologize. Either way, you will have spoken your feelings, and that does lead to healing and keeps us from bottling that stuff up, and eating our emotions.

Just be "REAL". I think this world would be a much better place if we all were. Sorry you had your feelings hurt.

[gmanbat 5,889]

There was a pig farm next to where I used to live. I had to drive by it. There was nothing I could do about the smell. But I knew it was a pig farm and pig crap stinks.

But that never stopped me from eating pork chops.

Some people are pig crap. They are used to their own smell and see nothing wrong with their behavior. You are not responsible for their actions. You don't have to retaliate. You don't have to reform them. You have to live your life as happy as you can. Don't let their crap get to you. Who cares what they think?

Good work on the weight loss!

[bethxxx 304]

I think you just need to remember that insensitive people like that often say things offhandedly that other people would take offense too. But that person doesn't realise that they are being offensive. I think if you were going to say something you should have done it there and then but now that the moments passed you shouldn't bring it up again. I only say that because I've worked for small family businesses before and they will talk about you

[Not Applicable 52]

There was a pig farm next to where I used to live. I had to drive by it. There was nothing I could do about the smell. But I knew it was a pig farm and pig crap stinks.

But that never stopped me from eating pork chops.

Some people are pig crap. They are used to their own smell and see nothing wrong with their behavior. You are not responsible for their actions. You don't have to retaliate. You don't have to reform them. You have to live your life as happy as you can. Don't let their crap get to you. Who cares what they think?

Good work on the weight loss!

This was hilarious!!! When people have said ridiculously insensitive things to me in the past I have silently reminded myself, "Water off a duck's back" now I'll just think they're "pig crap". Thank you!!

[Pixie Dust 526]

There was a pig farm next to where I used to live. I had to drive by it. There was nothing I could do about the smell. But I knew it was a pig farm and pig crap stinks.

But that never stopped me from eating pork chops.

Some people are pig crap. They are used to their own smell and see nothing wrong with their behavior. You are not responsible for their actions. You don't have to retaliate. You don't have to reform them. You have to live your life as happy as you can. Don't let their crap get to you. Who cares what they think?

Good work on the weight loss!

You are my idol! **bows down in reverence** Hail to gmanbat!

Agreed on everything! Just let it roll, seriouslychange. Stupid, ignorant people like that don't have a clue! Not a clue! In fact, I would feel sorry for her because you can fix your weight but there is no fixing STUPID! No program or surgery in the world can fix her!

Stand tall & proud, you've done so great!

[Not Applicable 52]

Maybe you could let it go for today, but if it happens again (& it probably will since they seem hopelessly clueless), you could prepare yourself to tactfully address the issue with them.

[Nicolanz 1,484]

That lady is a beeeeotch! I've seen 330 in the scale before too. I was so depressed and unhappy. What a rude and immature thing to say! Never confide in her again! I would just keep it a "hi and bye" relationship from now on.

[soocalchic 1,087]

I just started this job about a month ago. All 3 of us girls were talking about weight. So I tell them: I'm 230. One asks: how much were you at your highest? I reply 330. And she says: "what? We're you constant eating? Holy f**k! You ate us both HAHAHA" referring to her and my other coworker.

I was sexually assaulted and that triggered my weight gain.

I'm really upset by her comments. But my company is family owned and I know that I gain nothing by complaining. What should I do? I don't want to lose my job but I am still upset...

Try not to talk about you weight if your going to get all upset about it.. Be proud of you accomplishment thus far..

[sharonintx 1,275]

I know what you mean about working in a family run company. I worked for one of those for over 8 years. There are certainly advantages but plenty of drawbacks too. The family got very comfortable with me and vice versa. The problem was that they got so used to me that they would speak to me just as if I were family, which is great unless it's a situation like you describe. People can be such idiots. I'm sorry you are having to deal with this and I hope you can resolve it one way or another. The reasons your weight went up are very personal and painful for you and I'm so sorry you are in this position.

[SeriouslyChange 319]

I think I'm just not going to talk about it. The only reason the topic came up is because all the women are on diets and I was pretty open about being Sleeved from day 1. I got the whole "it's the easy, quick way out"

I just haven't run into someone like this in so long. Usually when I say I dropped 100 pounds, people are like "oh" or "congrats!" But not "that's a whole person! 2 kids! Like 10 infants!!!"

I'll just let it go. For now.

[PurplePrincess 6]

I'm sorry the world is full of asshats. And sorry they hurt you. Being a closet smart ass, I probably would have popped off with " hahaha yeah...lucky for you, you were so nasty I had to throw you back up. Smile and walk away smiling.

[soocalchic 1,087]

I'm sorry the world is full of asshats. And sorry they hurt you. Being a closet smart ass' date=' I probably would have popped off with " hahaha yeah...lucky for you, you were so nasty I had to throw you back up. Smile and walk away smiling.[/quote']

Lol Asshats hilarious

[BKLYNgal87 503]

She also probably thought it was okay to say it because you are no longer that weight. Which is stupid regardless. Were you somehow not a human being with feelings at 330 lbs? Sigh. Agree 100% with the pig farm analogy. Also, a cross section of internet commentary shows you how rude and mean people can be when they feel a sense of anonymity. Some folks are rude and insensitive enough that they don't care if they are insulting someone they are staring in the face. Since you have concerns about job security, swallow the hurt feelings for now.

I guess I am lucky. Of the co-workers, not many - it's no one's business but my boss really, I told the only negative reactions I got weren't "oh you're taking the easy way out" it was more like "are you sure you want to have a risky surgery?", which is a valid question.