How did you handle life after your body Changed?

[KimmieMarie 17]

I am almost 4 weeks post op and am very determined to walk the straight and narrow path towards my goal weight. I know many people who litterally LOST THEIR MINDS when they started getting attention from men. Parties, drinking, and men men men. I also have a loving boyfriend who I do NOT want to stray from because I become so full of myself.

My goal is to use my newfound health to open up and grow as a woman. I am 28 and want to do things that I wasn't able to do before. I want to go backpacking again, white Water rafting, learn new skills, travel....so many things that just seem so much more appealing than drinking, partying, messing around.

I would like some input from those long-term sleevers. Please tell me how you handled all of it...what you did to prevent yourself from going down the wrong path?

Thanks:)

[pinkpeonies 42]

IME, the key is to make lifestyle changes together. As one unit, you'll be growing together and supporting each other.

DH and I were both banded six months apart, and this worked for us. Now that I have my new little tummy, he's really stepped it up. He's watching what he eats more, working out, being very supportive. If he wasn't, I'm not sure how things would be between us.

[gmanbat 5,889]

It is a fact that you can trade one addiction for another. Some of us have personalities that are prone to addictions. My history testifies that I am one of those people.

Drugs, immorality, drinking, smoking, all have been my captors at times. food addiction was the latest of my jailers.

I determined that losing fat and food addiction was a part of the me renaissance. I went to the one who promised freedom, the Son. He has strengthened me and led me to a freedom that I have never had before.

I have found that freedom brings intimacy, with God and those around me. I am no longer hidden behind destructive compulsions and being at peace with and liking myself frees me to give love. I deem myself worthy and know that the love that I have to give is valuable.

I have a new body but have no desire to betray my wife. My life is about much more than my body, it's just that my body does not stop me from life any more. Everything has taken on a new richness. I have power to go downhill but don't want to, the air is cleaner the higher you go.

If I have an addiction now it would be exercise. I love it! I have a lot more energy and it feels so good to use it. It is much easier to tell if something is alive if it is moving.

Exercise addiction can be a problem like any good thing taken to extremes. Having experience with all my other addictions I can tell when it is interfering with more important things or it becomes too exhausting or injurious. It is much easier to control than food cravings.

[CowgirlJane 14,259]

I think the fact that you are facing it up front goes a long ways. Self awareness is I think a big part of the battle.

So, i have had few moments of feeling crazy. Maybe not in the way you are thinking exactly but you don't go from being 300+ somewhat blobby in appearance to a fairly attractive woman in a years time without a few ups and downs emotionally.

Girlfriends help alot. Sounding boards and if they are good friends will give you that reality slap if you need it.

First, I really didn't believed I looked good. I noticed people (men people) looking at me and just assumed it was because I looked weird/fat/dressed oddly. Sure, my family and friends complimented me - but they love me so they must be lying, right? I think it was the day that my horse vet (very conservative guy i have known for years) saw me at a social event and said "you look HOT!" that i realized... hmmm... maybe I do look more attractive.

Second, you have to decide what to do with this new body of yours. It belongs to YOU, not anybody else. i am totally digging that i can ride horses like a fiend, hike, bike, play, workout and just enjoy it! I can dress up and look nice or I can just go casual... and just look freaking normal! If I do happen to get an appreciative look or proposition, I chalk it up to "atta girl" it isn't really something I need to respond to or act on. Normal women have been dealing with that most of their lives, and it is cool - nothing to go over a cliff about.

Third, I guess you have to decide what you WANT from your relationships. I have shared before some challenges with my partner, but honestly they have been there for years. They aren't new and they aren't caused by me acting any differently. In fact, I have asked him, my sons and friends if I act any different and they all just say that I am happier and more active. and nicer and friendlier... glad nobody said I had gone skanky or anything...lol Good.

Anyway, I find that physical outlets for my BOUNDLESS energy is key.

I excercise regularly, and intensely.

I do my horse stuff... idle hands are the devils playground or something like that.

I have noticed lately that i just feel more regular all the time. I am no longer the obese woman pretending to be normal. I am feeling more normal.

My next big challenge is plastics and I expect a revival of some of the crazy feelings here and there.

Strap that head on tight and go!

[melissa130 135]

It is a fact that you can trade one addiction for another. Some of us have personalities that are prone to addictions. My history testifies that I am one of those people.

Drugs, immorality, drinking, smoking, all have been my captors at times. food addiction was the latest of my jailers.

I determined that losing fat and food addiction was a part of the me renaissance. I went to the one who promised freedom, the Son. He has strengthened me and led me to a freedom that I have never had before.

I have found that freedom brings intimacy, with God and those around me. I am no longer hidden behind destructive compulsions and being at peace with and liking myself frees me to give love. I deem myself worthy and know that the love that I have to give is valuable.

I have a new body but have no desire to betray my wife. My life is about much more than my body, it's just that my body does not stop me from life any more. Everything has taken on a new richness. I have power to go downhill but don't want to, the air is cleaner the higher you go.

What a beautiful post. i can feel your light!!!

[KimmieMarie 17]

Thank you for the wonderful responses!!!