Dr. Gerald Kirshenbaum - Considering Dr. Kirshenbaum

[want2bmeagain 0]

Karen and Gurlygirl~

I have given the psychological effects of the lapband inordinate hours of thought and have come up with a theory, so to speak. If we were on a knee replacement, or hysterectomy, or gallbladder message board I don't think we would be reading so many posts about totally freaking out before surgery~nor would we be freaking out if we were heading to a "non-elective" surgery.

We have chosen this surgery, it is not necessary (in the surgery realm...for us fat people, it IS necessary..just wanted to clarify that)~ We have made a choice to max our credit card, get a second on our house, take out a loan, add payments to our already stretched paychecks, PLUS we have CHOSEN to put our lives at risk (the "I could die from anasthesia or infection" part)~ I believe because we have chosen something that we don't really have to do, we are stockpiling onto our already guilt ridden selves. Gosh, if I had controlled myself years ago I wouldn't have to do this, if I had discipline I wouldn't have to have this surgery, if I really cared about myself I wouldn't be in this boat...So we mentally feel like sh*t because of the self esteem joys that come with obesity~now we are piling on the guilt that, by choice, we could die~ or fail ~ because we have so far been failures on this road.

Bottom line, this is elective and we are choosing something that might have complications...man, talk about panic. If we had doubled over uterine fibroids, we couldn't wait for surgery! But, we can wait, we don't have to do this, is it really necessary to go through with this? There are a million reasons to doubt, lapband isn't our only option, right?

That is my summation of our reasons for such deep fear and panic. Reality is, we are very brave souls to have this procedure, we are taking control, not giving it away. We are willing to take the risks because we truly do love ourselves and our families and friends. We are having an "elective" surgery done, not for vanity, but for life. If we can truly grasp that our life, and quality of life, truly depends on this surgery, as would surgery for a physical hole in our heart~ we can only then stomp out the doubt and guilt. In a psychological sense, we are having the hole in our heart repaired, and it IS a necessary choice to make.

Luckily, we are choosing a TOOL that makes it very difficult to fail. We are so used to failure in this realm, that it really is hard to imagine that we aren't just going to fail again~but, we aren't. Our soul, spirit, heart, and finances are invested. We love ourselves enough to have our surgery and we will continue to love ourselves enough to be a success!

I was INSANELY panicked until I realized all of this. I had to surrender myself to the commitment I had made, buckle up, and flow with the ride. I also had to let myself trust the words of others who have gone this journey before me. Once I was able to commit to my commitment and let the rest unfold, I did much better~ Dr. K is amazing. One of the pre op nurses said that I could not be in better hands, anywhere. I had to believe and surrender to that!

I am now 4 days post op...still more sore than I expected, but still going by trust and surrender, and making the choices I need to be successful. It ain't easy, but it's a hell of a lot easier than any other road I have taken to get rid of the fat and get healthier...I am looking forward to waking up energized and totally pain free!

When you wake up from anasthesia (which you will!), the excitement and motivation will set in...I promise!!! I am very proud of myself for committing and doing!!

[mare5569 0]

Hey, this is Marilyn, Ive not been on the talk group for a couple of days and so much happens.

First- I want to say how wonderful it was to meet everyone at Red Robin. What an incredible, supportive, beautiful group.

Second - Travel expenses for medical treatment are deductible.

Third- Yes, there are plenty of times (I'm a month out) that I wish I could have done this without the surgery. But---I couldn't. I am below 200 lbs for the first time in years!!!!! yes it still takes work, not a majic bullet--don't we all wish is was, but it is the first time in I can't remember when that doing something about what I eat is actually making a difference. For me to be full on half a burrito, to feel satisfied and not wanting to lick the plate is such a wonderful thing. There are still days when I have an extra Protein Bar etc and mess up. But, I don't eat 3-4 Protein Bars one right after another. Chewing and small bites is still taking practice and thinking at each meal. I had trouble with scrambled eggs last night because I was eating on automatic, instead of thinking. It was a painful reminder. We can do this together!!

Fourth- If you go back and read some of my post from earlier, you'll find I asked Dr. K when going into surgery if it was too late to go home.

You all rock!!

Marilyn

[DynamoMini 1]

want2bemeagain - you know you are really you again, right now. You are closer to who you really are than you have been for years. When I read your analysis of why we doubt, questioning our decision, it was clear to me. You are there. Thank you.

Mare - congrats on your weight loss.

Releasing the weight is only part of the journey. Realizing that I have a RIGHT to a healthy life and DESERVE a healthy life have been harder lessons for me. Losing weight is hard work, even with a band, the head work is a significant stretch for me - just knowing I can have a healthy body that lives at a healthy weight is a revelation.

Hugs to all you and happy weekend,

Michelle

[want2bmeagain 0]

Yep to that thought, Michelle! The bridge from undeserving to deserving, and from not having the right to being allowed! Another hurdle, another place to surrender and accept! Great insight!

Kelly

[LSzeliga 0]

Well my Band date with Dr K is Oct 11th @ 3:00 pm... I have started a diet and in three weeks have lost 23 lbs and working with a trainer 3X week and riding bike the other days 6 miles. I cant wait<<<<<<<<<

[ShelbiCallie 0]

"If we can truly grasp that our life, and quality of life, truly depends on this surgery, as would surgery for a physical hole in our heart~ we can only then stomp out the doubt and guilt. In a psychological sense, we are having the hole in our heart repaired, and it IS a necessary choice to make." That is such a powerful passage right there! I've been carrying my pounds of doubt and the guilt until I am smothering underneath it all. You're so on point with this. This is life saving for me, for all of us, and life is only going to get better and better. Thank you, thank you for your insights, Kelly.

Mare! I remember now about your asking to leave during pre-op. I am so proud that you are now south of 200! You are doing it; I can't wait to be there!

Have a wonderful rest of the weekend friends! This time next week I'll be back here writing to you with my new band aboard and working on my health. I am so fortunate to have found this board of wonderful, supportive people!

[marcyinak 0]

Well, it's about 50 degrees here in Nome, weather has been CRAPPY this whole week, but the waves pushed a lot of sea glass (pieces of glass rubbed soft by the water/sand) onto the shore so I've been out the past couple of days collecting it. I found some of the coveted blue glass today and that was exciting. My little girl started finding some too.

I don't know what's wrong with me. I resolved the other night to just have Protein Shakes for a few days for Breakfast and lunch - which is usually not a problem. So I do that, but then 4pm comes around and I'm grazing (not good choices either) and have a large supper. I tried chicken again and it didn't go down all that well. But last night I was able to eat THREE pieces of pizza! What the heck?!?! I feel like a pig!

Excersize has been better for me this week though. We, the family, have been to the pool twice this week and then there's the beach combing (lots up up down, up down) and I went for a killer 50 min. walk yesterday with a friend. I'm hoping to keep it up...we'll see though.

Now if I could just keep the crap out of my house I wouldn't eat it! What was I thinking buying Red Fish (Sweedish Fish to some of you)...you just can't stop at one! AAAAHHHHHH!!!!!

[NM Sunshine 1]

:whoo:Surgery went great, except for the pain in my lungs. It felt like I had chicken Flu or something waking up from anestesia. I have asthma and that is why. One of the main reasons I had to have mine done in a hospital rather than a surgery clinic.

Not much of the other pains.

My rock hard belly looks like I'm about to download twins! I have to go to a court hearing this Tuesday and none of my court type clothes fit cause of belly.

I couldn't produce any gas until yesterday then it was the wet toots. So I spent day on the pot. Today lots of the normal old gas. Relieves the gas pains a lot.

Not had any real hunger pains but that never kept me from eating..LOL..still on liquid diet.< /p>

WANTTOBEME

Also I got some news for you about your sugar taste. Read an article about super tasters and if you are one you will strongly tell the difference between sugar and fake. You're a super taster.

I had a hystorectomy too and the pain with it was horrid. This is MUCH MUCH less.

How R U doing?

[want2bmeagain 0]

Hi Sunshine!

welcome back! Super Tasters, huh? where was the article? I sure would love to read that! If there is such a thing, cracks me up! I have never been able to adequately explain to my family why I like to eat soooo much, other than to say "gawd, it tastes sooo good I can't stop!" And I have felt like a freak with this sugar/artificial sweetner thing, but my taste buds freak out when I taste something with the fake stuff. Even having the nurse test me was quite funny!

Gawd, at least you are tooting! I have had little visits from the fart fairy here and there, but would love to be like an old lady in a store who has a 5 second fart and pretends not to notice!:whoo:

The wierd thing about my prego belly is that I find myself rubbing it just like when I was pregnant, 16 and 20 yrs ago! I have to watch myself that I don't unknowingly do that in a store!

Man, I hope you find something you can wear to court. Is it for work? If you have a skirt, maybe you could keep it kind of unzipped, pin it, and hide it with a jacket or something?

The pain is doing better, but today I feel like all I want to do is sleep.

Hey~ bandster veterans...when does this duraskin, or whatever it's called, fall off? Or am I supposed to take it off after a week? I will get a hold of the office Monday and ask, but I'm being impatient! It must be good stuff. This is gross, but, under it, I still have bright red liquid blood on a few of my incisions...

CONGRATULATIONS LSzeliga!!!

Yep, Shelbi...the guilt we carry ~ it's time for it to go bye bye and for that to be ok with us!

Marcy...sea glass!!! oooohhhh, I love that stuff! You lucky ducky!!!

Well, buddies, I am going to try and get my daily shower and pretend I feel totally normal!

[want2bmeagain 0]

Forgot something hysterical...when I was at my daughter's I had a little toot, and my daughter said "Mom, did you just shart?" I said, "what??", she said "you know, sh*t and fart at the same time"

OMG, I laughed!

[littleroo1 0]

I took off the clear bandages after a week. You want all the liquid to be dried up or reabsorbed, and especially the port one will take the full 7 days to dry up. I've still been putting neosporin on them twice a day since then but mine are all doing well. The port one is definitely closed, was much better after the bandage was off and it could really dry up.

I know the liquidy stuff is gross.... BUT at least you can see that you aren't getting any infections!

Marcy... I'm so jealous... sea glass!!!!! They are sea jewels!

[stephaniez 0]

Dear Karen, My husband and I are both bandsters, my surgery was in Nov 06 in Louisville, Ky almost $19,000. His surgery was last week by Dr K we had lots of questions. Was he real was this legitimate were we wasting a lot of time and money? Was this the best choice? I have to say I was very impressed. I don't think my husband received any less care than I did. He did have less pre-op testing( testing before surgery) but was the EKG, LABS,UGI all necessary or just another way for the hospital to make more money? Dr K uses an Outpatient Surgical Center attached to a hospital. You will find out after talking to him why he is doing this.He wanted to give pts an alternative to Mexico at close to the same price. He uses the new Allergan AP lapband,better than the one I have. I have lost 100 lbs, about 20 was prior to banding. We will return to CO for his fills you can travel a lot for $9,000. So if you have any doubts this is normal, Dr K is real and a very nice man. He has a true compassion for changing peoples lives.

[ShelbiCallie 0]

Stephanie, congratulations on your weight loss!!:whoo: I'm glad to hear that your husband had such great care from Dr. K. Thanks for your reassuring words. I chose Dr. K after researching surgeons (for months) in NC, GA, FL and abroad and having an in-person consultation with one and a phone consultation with another -- I'm very confident in Dr. K's surgical skills and everything I read here just reinforces that belief! I've had some lapses, over the last few days, about my decision to invest $$ in myself when I have children to consider first, but then, with the help of the wonderful support here, I am getting over my fear, guilt, etc and realizing that this is a positive choice no matter how I look at it! Life can only get better and I can't wait to get my band placed now!(installed?, put in?, applied? -- what the heck is the right word here?):confused:

[Woofay 0]

Wow! This thread is usually really slow on weekends! What a day yesterday.

LSzeliga~ You are really doing well. Wait until you get some band help. You will be the perfect example of the band at its maximum. Congrats on getting your date and weight loss!

Want2bmeagain~ You go girl! Great mind set!

Mare~ it was so great to meet you the other night. Can't wait until next month.

Dynamo~ We still need to come up with the October date for our dinner...suggestions on when the most will be here? Oct 10 and 11th Lap Dancer will be here too.......maybe one of those days? (Plus, I'm always up for more than one night!:confused: ha!) It's just soo neat to put people to these posts!

[Woofay 0]

Gurlygirl~ are you ready for your appointment tomorrow? I can't wait to meet you! My appointment is at 2:15, but I usually get there rather early to try and beat the lovely lovely Denver traffic and get back to The Springs. (it reminds me all too well why I got out of Phoenix!) Did I understand your posts earlier that you are coming from Canada, or did you recently move from there? You'll recognize me as I got this terrible wild hair yesterday and bleached my hair blond...and it was a rotten job. Hahaha! I've dyed it twice since then, but it still looks, well, rather icky! Ha! I do something like this every 10 years or so...reminds me why I pay 100 bucks to get it done right the first time! Oh well! It will grow out! Its just hair! Have a great day!:confused: