Jump to content
×
Are you looking for the BariatricPal Store? Go now!

Something horrible happened last night...



Recommended Posts

Since Novemeber, I have been planning this surgery. I only told my husband and my friend who is picking me up from the airport. I intentionally left my parents out of the information loop because they are older and I was worried how they would receive the news. Well, last night they showed up on my front doorstep at 9pm. My husband, who unbeknownst to me was desperate to keep me from going (he couldn't tell me this?!), had called them and told them I was going to Mexico to have an organ removed. They were crying and begging me to reconsider. They said they would help me find an alternative and they would pay for health services my insurance wouldn't cover. For two hours I cried and tried to explain to them what I was doing and where I was going and how safe it actually was compared to other kinds of surgery...but to no avail. They even suggested that the people who had recommended my doctor to me were fake profiles of people creating fake blogs to trick me into a scam.

My plane ticket is booked. My arrangements are made. Everything is ready to go.

I'm lost. I have no idea what to do. My husband and parents are the most important people in my life. I told them the only promise I could make is to call my doctor and see if he would allow me to reschedule. If he consents, I have to find a way to exchange my plane ticket.

I cried so much last night that my eyes are almost swollen shut this morning.

Please advise.

Bee

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Show them success stories and explain that you want to be one of them too! Good luck and I am sorry that this happened! Do what feels right for you! Have no regrets! I did not go to Mexico, and I am definitely not a fake person.....I am real and have lost almost 50 pounds since January 8! Good luck and I say continue on your path!

Sent from my iPhone using VST

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

So sorry for your dilemma. I also am a real person....not a madeup story. I had my surgery done in Peoria, IL and my insurance covered it but as we all know not everyone qualifies for insurance coverage and those people usually go to Mexico. Good luck to you....I am sure this is difficult for you after all the research, planning and anticipation that goes into this decision.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I think I'd go anyway. They mean well but they cannot make choices for you. You made your choice. Stick with it. They'll get over it by the time you get home. Go girl!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Bee I went to Mexico. Very safe I had no complications, no nausea, no gas, no real pain. I was there in September 2012 and have now reached my goal weight and am so very happy that I did this for myself.

Don't let them talk you out of it; you will regret it.

If you/they want to talk to me please PM me.

All the best

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Their reaction is clearly the reason why you didn't tell them! Don't let anyone stand in your way, I'd be saying I'm an adult I've done my research and I've made my decision . I'd like your support , however if u don't like my des ion then respectfully I'd ask u to keep your opinions to yourself.

And seriously how's ur husbands form .... Ringing your parents behind your back.... Sounds like a bit of sabotage to me. Im not trying to be nasty n I'm sure your husband loves you, but if my husband did that to me, I would go off my head!

I didn't have surgery in Mexico but many others on this site have and have survived.

Good luck with your dilemma , follow your heart, do what u want to do, not what others want you too, it's your body n your life after all :)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

You know your parents love you but they are blocked because of fear. it is something that was sprung on them and they had no time to adjust to the idea. I would confess your love for them but tell them you are following through with what you have started. Carry on with your plans.. as you come back safe and sound and begin to loose you weight they will realize that they worried for nothing. I know it will be a harder road now, but you already made the hard decision to do this now just stick with it! As for your husband, now that is a different story!! :(

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Ask your mom/dad to accompany you to mexico for your surgery if they are so scared. Promise them if you or they see something out of the ordinary or unsafe conditions that you will back out of it. Have the Dr send you his credentials. And most importantly try to reason with them. If my insurance didn't cover my surgery i probably would of gone to Mexico as well. Luckily my Insurance covered my surgery and i am now 11 weeks post op and loving it. They mean well. Now your husband i would send to the Dog house! Good luck

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

have you considered taking a family member with you? perhaps having someone go will validate to the others that it is a safe place and you will be well taken care of. Best wishes on your journey. Just remember, they are family and they love you.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I went to Mexico too. I was perfectly safe, the Dr was excellent, the hospital staff was very good to me, and I don't regret my decision. I've lost 21.5 lbs in 2 and a half weeks.

It's hard to stand up to your parents. I know this very well. You are a grown woman and can make your decision.

Not sure what's up with your husband but if mine pulled a stunt like that he would very soon find himself an "Ex-Husband".

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Bee - my folks FREAKED OUT too. It was awful as I am very close to them. The bottom line was this....they had not done the research I had done. They had no time time do anything other than freak out. Initially when I started looking at surgery in Mexcio, I too was uneducated and fearful. They found one person who worked with someone who had the VSG who WAS NOT FOLLOWING THE DIET and held up that person as the example of what everyone does after this surgery.

The bottom line is this....are you comfortable with your decision about your body? Can you get your husband and your family to respectfully disagree with your choice while still loving YOU?

In the end, my parents are proud of my weightloss and my taking charge of my health. Push back on them. Ask them to find the examples of REAL PEOPLE who had bad experiences with healthcare in Mexico.

I am a real person who used Dr. Ortiz and I would be glad to share my phone number with you and talk with all of them. I've lost 32 lbs and am off all my blood pressure medication. Could have never done this on my own or paid for this in the States. I'm hoping if they can't be supportive they can at least avoid being negative.

Hugs...Shelley

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

What do you want to do? What do you want the rest of your life to be like?

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Sorry to hear this, they love you very much but the most important person to you, should be yourself! Good luck

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I don't have any answers for you. I just want to say that my heart goes out to you--what a heart-breaking thing to have happen. You know that both your husband and parents are coming from a place of caring, yet it is based on misinformation or lack of information, and that's a tough spot to be in.

I am sending you positive thoughts and energy and I hope that this all blows over and is just a blip on your amazing journey ahead.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

TO HAVE AN ORGAN REMOVED? Talk about drama .. Good Lord!

I'm so sorry you're going through this. I am a real Seattle person who has gone to MX many times for surgery and will go back. One of my daughters has insurance coverage and will be going to MX because she trusts my docs extensive experience over docs here in the states. My other daughter is going in the fall.

I'm on my way to work, but PM me if you need to talk and I'll make my phone # available to you

Prayers for you.. And to your family

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

  • Trending Products

  • Trending Topics

  • Recent Status Updates

    • rinabobina

      I would like to know what questions you wish you had asked prior to your duodenal switch surgery?
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • cryoder22

      Day 1 of pre-op liquid diet (3 weeks) and I'm having a hard time already. I feel hungry and just want to eat. I got the protein and supplements recommend by my program and having a hard time getting 1 down. My doctor / nutritionist has me on the following:
      1 protein shake (bariatric advantage chocolate) with 8 oz of fat free milk 1 snack = 1 unjury protein shake (root beer) 1 protein shake (bariatric advantage orange cream) 1 snack = 1 unjury protein bar 1 protein shake (bariatric advantace orange cream or chocolate) 1 snack = 1 unjury protein soup (chicken) 3 servings of sugar free jello and popsicles throughout the day. 64 oz of water (I have flavor packets). Hot tea and coffee with splenda has been approved as well. Does anyone recommend anything for the next 3 weeks?
      · 1 reply
      1. NickelChip

        All I can tell you is that for me, it got easier after the first week. The hunger pains got less intense and I kind of got used to it and gave up torturing myself by thinking about food. But if you can, get anything tempting out of the house and avoid being around people who are eating. I sent my kids to my parents' house for two weeks so I wouldn't have to prepare meals I couldn't eat. After surgery, the hunger was totally gone.

    • buildabetteranna

      I have my final approval from my insurance, only thing holding up things is one last x-ray needed, which I have scheduled for the fourth of next month, which is my birthday.

      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • BetterLeah

      Woohoo! I have 7 more days till surgery, So far I am already down a total of 20lbs since I started this journey. 
      · 1 reply
      1. NeonRaven8919

        Well done! I'm 9 days away from surgery! Keep us updated!

    • Ladiva04

      Hello,
      I had my surgery on the 25th of June of this year. Starting off at 117 kilos.😒
      · 1 reply
      1. NeonRaven8919

        Congrats on the surgery!

  • Recent Topics

  • Hot Products

  • Sign Up For
    Our Newsletter

    Follow us for the latest news
    and special product offers!
  • Together, we have lost...
      lbs

    PatchAid Vitamin Patches

    ×