IF YOU HAVE NOTHING NICE TO SAY...THEN DON'T SAY IT.

[dat_sweetmami 81]

PEOPLE.....Please learn how to speak to 1 another and if you're not going to say something nice then don't write on the the forum. This is not a place to humiliate or degrade anyone. This is a place where we can come to each other ask each other for advice and to lean back on 1 another. Obviously because we might feel comfortable with the people on here and speaking to some of you who have gone through what were going through might be helpful. STOP THE NEGATIVITY...

AIN'T NOBODY GOT TIME FOR THAT!!!

GOD IS LOVE<3<3<3<3 PEACE

[PdxMan 4,292]

Sometimes posts can be interpreted as being negative, but really are meant to be supportive. Soooo many people come on here looking to validate behaviors they know they shouldn't be doing. Then, when they don't get the answer they want, they get upset.

There is an old saying, "People ask advice when they know the answer, but don't like it."

... and another, "Advice after mischief is like medicine after death."

I recall a torrential thread about 15 months ago from someone who was a week post op and was asking what they could order at Dairy Queen.

The thread blew up.

Really? If someone posts something like this, it is just hard to sit back and watch them. I still get sad when I drive past car accidents.

[PdxMan 4,292]

Oh, before this thread blows up, let's remind ourselves about THIS.

[fyre_storm 1,412]

Figuring out the tone some one meant is difficult over the Internet. Ppl will always find something to complain about. It's human nature and the invisibility of the Internet makes it even easier for them to be more abrupt. Just take everything with a grain of salt

[dat_sweetmami 81]

I don't knowwww...pdx you seem to be all up on my forums. You must be quite bored ...hmmmmm

[PdxMan 4,292]

Uh ... I don't know about being all up in your threads (I assume that is what you're talking about). I look at the recent threads on the right side of the webpage.

I have many small intervals in my work day, so I come on here and see if I am able to share my experience, strength and hope. There are many folks on here who truly struggle with this journey who are not looking to validate poor behaviors, but rather looking to make a change in their lives.

That was my case when I was new. I wasn't looking for the loopholes, but to make a change. The folks here helped me tremendously. Sometimes it was through tough-love, which is what I needed.

I hope you find what you are needing here. Just know, it may not be necessarily what you want.

There is a difference.

[dat_sweetmami 81]

Uh ... I don't know about being all up in your threads (I assume that is what you're talking about). I have many small intervals in my work day' date=' so I come on here and see if I am able to share my experience, strength and hope. There are many folks on here who truly struggle with this journey who are not looking to validate poor behaviors, but rather looking to make a change in their lives.

That was my case when I was new. I wasn't looking for the loopholes, but to make a change. The folks here helped me tremendously. Sometimes it was through tough-love, which is what I needed.

I hope you find what you are needing here. Just know, it may not be necessarily what you want.

There is a difference.[/quote']

Good for you. Have a nice day!

[Cyant 29]

I don't knowwww...pdx you seem to be all up on my forums. You must be quite bored ...hmmmmm

Maybe Pdx isn't bored just helpful wanting to give back. I have always appreciated PDX comments. I agree its hard and sad to watch a train wreck

[washffpm 56]

I have been on this forum for almost a year now and when PDX posts he is usually trying to help other people on here cope with there issues. He is a positive influence on many people trying to find there way with this new lifestyle that we are all trying to find our way with.

Sent from my iPhone using VST

[PdxMan 4,292]

Good for you. Have a nice day!

Thanks! You too.

I hope you find the serenity you, and each of us, deserve.

[dat_sweetmami 81]

Thanks! You too.

I hope you find the serenity you' date=' and each of us, deserve.[/quote']

Amen :-) same to you !

[anniemay 150]

I have not been on this forum for long and have found some really great support and ideas here. I understand about the "train wreck" and have seen some threads like this.....I would have to say my biggest frustration with the forum is that many threads get bogged down with people bantering back and forth and you have sort through all the bs to find solid answers - many times it really looks like these users should be utilitizing the chat function rather than the threads.....I am not criticizing - just observing - and I will continue to sort through threads and unsubscribe when my email gets blown up with silliness.

[deltadawn817 106]

To the original OP when I first found this sit I thought it was GREAT, WONDERFUL I was ecstatic I found a place to go to HELP me.

I am now a year out and I rarely visit due to peoples posts being mean, hurtful, accusatory..etc I could go on.

I decided that to make my VGS trip successful I had to stay away from here because even typed words hurt and bring in doubt.

I feel some people forgot that we are/were all overweight for a reason. Weather it be food addiction emotional eaters or some other suppressing issues. There for a lot of the responses were not helping me. I now when reading a post don't read responses I just post to the OP.

I have stopped asking any questions and just hope to help others how I want to be helped.

[SleeveNZ 219]

I don't knowwww...pdx you seem to be all up on my forums. You must be quite bored ...hmmmmm

Sounds like negativity to me ... maybe take some of your own advice???

[Sadtosaygoodbye 256]

PdxMan I must say I have read soooooo many of your posts, and I appreciate the advice you give. You have never appeared in my opinion to be judgmental, just forthright. Just incase you wont hear it again today, gee whiz I think you're great!! Don't quit doing what you do.