Struggling

[rmubvashrink 57]

I can't figure out why I'm so stressed out. I'm about 3weeks and 5 days out. I'm down 26 pounds and I'm going nuts I work at Starbucks surrounded by freakin pastries I have a husband and kids to cook for. Today I had to hold a damn pizza .......... So I ate a pepperoni and cheese topping..... Then I knew it was wrong so I spit it out. I love my job but it's slow torture.... I'm going to go nuts..... My two yer old is the sweetest boy in the world but he is making me want cry he cries all day almost just whining omg I just wanna leave! God help me

[Chelenka 827]

I can understand that working at Starbucks would be torture! Love Starbucks! But you've lost 26 lbs already! That's fantastic and you've worked hard for it. I think you should talk with your husband about stepping up to the plate (pardon the pun) and doing some of the meal preparation. Ask him to keep pizza and other trigger foods out of the house for the time being. My husband actually brought pizza slices into my hospital room the day after my surgery! He was clueless! I had to set him strait and asked him not to bring pizza anywhere near me. If he wants it he has to go out for it and stay out! Ha! As for your little boy, he may be just in the terrible twos but also is probably sensing your stress and anxiety. What you are embarking on takes great determination and courage and you are not able to use your coping mechanism, food. I was a basket case the first week of my pre-op diet as I detoxed from all the sugar I had been eating and the first week post-op on Clear Liquids was also very hard for me. Once I got thru that things have been easier. I wish you all the best for your journey. Hang in there and try to get some quiet time for self-reflection and meditation or prayer.

[sharonintx 1,275]

Ah yes - the two year old whine machine. I remember it well. What Chelenka said is true. Your child can sense that something is up with you and is unable to express it any other way. That's one of the worst parenting issues I've ever faced. To have to be "mommy" and put your own issues aside for the sake of the child really does suck most of the time. But it's what we do and it's what makes us extraordinary human beings. You will make it through this just fine. Just be mommy and worry about your own issues later:)

I can't imagine having to be around the pastries all day. You are a better woman than I to even show up at work. You are doing a great job - keep it up! Oh, and I am about 5 days behind you after the surgery. I actually tried to eat some pizza. It was good but after the hassle of chewing it to death and the fact that I was able to eat about 3 bites before I gave the rest to the dog made it seem not worth the hassle of eating it. Back to the soft scrambled eggs

[deedeemuffin 346]

First of all, congratulations on your great start losing weight. This surgery was a lot harder than I had anticipated. Just because we have tiny tummies now doesn't mean that we are immune from wanting food. even at almost 4 months out I still feel somewhat overwhelmed. When I see TV commercials for food I get upset. When I am at the grocery store & there are so many things that I know can't go in my cart, I feel stressed. At holidays & parties I literally sometimes feel sad because I can't have what I want. I should say that I can't have the quantity that I want. I'm sure that you get the picture.

This change does not happen overnight & there will be weeks when the scale won't move. Just try to keep in mind your goals. How do you want to feel or look like? Is there something that you want to do that you can't do now because of your weight? Concentrating on those things really helps. Write them down & put them on the fridge or someplace that you see every day.

This does get easier as time goes by. Also Celebrate every victory...a loss on the scale, going down a clothing size, being able to walk more without getting so tired. Whatever is a victory for you write it down. Then you can look at it when you need a little boost. You can do this. This is a great community to get support. So, utilize it.

Wishing you all the best!

[Lissa 2,631]

Add in that your hormones are going insane right now, simply because of the weight loss, and you're having a rough time. (((Hugs))) It will get better. I can't imagine having to work at Starbucks, but maybe imagining all of that food as weight/fat would help you avoid it. Starbucks' treats don't tempt me at all because most of them are bread-based and I simply can't eat bread these days. I love their coffee, though, and have to be very careful not to get in trouble when I order a drink in there. I'm sure the employees think I'm a total rube because I still order "Large Decaf, two splenda, two creamers", but that's what I can drink. I can never remember their fancy word for Large, sorry. As for hubby bringing home pizza, IMO, that's grounds for beating him! LOL I've found that I still love a piece or two of the pepperoni topping with hot cheese, but there's no way I can eat a whole slice most days. You'll find a way to accommodate your tastes while still adhering to your food plan as you get further out from surgery. It just takes time. You're doing great on your weight loss, though!! 26 pounds is NOTHING to sneeze at!!!

[rmubvashrink 57]

Wow you guys are amazing I'm laughing and feeling better thank you all so much for the support!

Rebecca