Any Regrets

[debi717 0]

Geezer, I joined this forum about 6 months ago and it didn't take me long to recognize that you have an axe to grind. Your posts are always negative and it seems to me that your intent is to discourage anyone who comes to this board looking for info about the band. You think you are being helpful by always painting the worst possible picture. Okay, so the lapband didn't work out for you and you decided to get the DS. Apparently, it was a good choice for you. Great. So, why don't you move on now? Isn't there a DS forum you can join? Go vent about your bad experience with the lap band on the Regrets forum, or a DS forum. I don't think your doom and gloom posts are helpful to anyone here. There's nothing wrong with having a positive attitude. The people who subscribe to this forum are not stupid, or should I say "simple", as you so nicely stated. Enough said.

Cindy, your posts were great and very helpful. Thanks for joining the thread and responding to Geezer with common sense anwers. They are much appreciated.

Debi

[beversman 0]

Geezer, I joined this forum about 6 months ago and it didn't take me long to recognize that you have an axe to grind. Your posts are always negative and it seems to me that your intent is to discourage anyone who comes to this board looking for info about the band. You think you are being helpful by always painting the worst possible picture. Okay, so the lapband didn't work out for you and you decided to get the DS. Apparently, it was a good choice for you. Great. So, why don't you move on now? Isn't there a DS forum you can join? Go vent about your bad experience with the lap band on the Regrets forum, or a DS forum. I don't think your doom and gloom posts are helpful to anyone here. There's nothing wrong with having a positive attitude. The people who subscribe to this forum are not stupid, or should I say "simple", as you so nicely stated. Enough said.

Cindy, your posts were great and very helpful. Thanks for joining the thread and responding to Geezer with common sense anwers. They are much appreciated.

Debi

I know what you mean. She is relentless. Apparently, she is used to having the last word and doesn't know when enough is enough. Now, she is just trying to insult people.

It is sad that she had such a bad experience that she can't move on with her life.

It's funny to see how someone can be so disrepectful and yet, still thinks he/she is making a point.

At first, I felt bad for her. Then, when others started trying to reason with her, she just kept lashing out at them... even when they complimented her on her success. So, I quickly gave up and have been laughing at her responses for the past two days. She just keeps on digging a hole.

What else can you do with someone so negative and rude? You just let them work it out... kind of like a child throwing a tantrum.

I just feel bad for new people that run into her and don't realize that her's is a "special" case. They could really get the wrong impression of the band.

[TamifromAL 1]

Yay Cindy. So right.

I think there's a slight risk that a lapband can turn you into a bitter and twisted old sourpuss, but statistically that's very rare, less than one patient per lap band forum.

For most people, they just lose weight.

:funnypost: :laugh

To answer the original question, no regrets here. Just as you are doing, I researched my options to become aware of the risks, and felt confident that I selected the best surgery for me. I'm thrilled with my results so far (-53 lbs. in 3 months).

Tami

[Telly 4]

So uh...how bout those NY Giants?

[debi717 0]

Hi, Bev. I'm not usually confrontational, but Geezer's negative posts nearly had me walk away from my pursuit of the lapband a couple of months ago. I sought out information on a couple of other websites to expose myself to a larger cross-section of people's personal experiences with the band. Overall, the majority of people are happy they got a lap band, even though they are aware that they may face some complications down the road. My impression is that in the majority of cases the complications are fixable, not life-threatening, and going forward life can be lived with or without the band. As with any surgery, there is a small percentage of people who could encounter more serious problems. That holds true for any surgery. I had someone on this forum who took me under her wing and helped me so much with sorting through the pros and cons. I'm very thankful for the time she spent responding to my endless questions.

Going forward, I'll do my best to ignore Geezer's rantings, but it was on my mind to say something for awhile. This thread gave me the opportunity. I feel a little bad for her too, but damn, enough is enough already. She scares people, and that isn't fair to people who are trying to make an already tough decision.

Debi

[debi717 0]

Telly, our NY Giants are in a bit of a slump. Not playing too well.

[cinward2001 0]

FONT="Comic Sans MS"]

Then, maybe you haven't read enough "newbie" posts (here and other places). Post-ops who really believe that they could eat just like before only a little less...who didn't know about drinking with meals...who didn't know about taking food slowly after adjustments...about why they aren't losing weight immediately post-op...about why the left shoulder hurts...about why they lost 20 pounds the first week and then nothing for three weeks..about NSAID's post-op...and on and on.

When there were thirty banding doctors, the patients were FAR better informed. We KNEW what to expect and there were no surprises. Now, there are more INexperienced surgeons banding UNeducated patients. It's a dangerous combination. [/font]

Geezer, on this topic (of uneducated bandsters), I'll agree with you wholeheartedly. I HAVE been a part of this board for quite a while (just usually not much of a poster) and there are several other bandsters boards that I read every day. I think it's awful when someone is banded without enough education going into the procedure. To me, that's more the fault of the surgical practice than the individual because you often don't know you don't know something. Hope that made sense. LOL But then, there is some degree of responsibility on the part of the patient to ask questions, do research, and be well-informed *prior to* banding.

I think that, in general, there are 2 groups of people who are unsuccessful with their band. The first group is rather rare...those people who have "medical" issues with their band. As in, repeated slips, erosions, esophageal complications, etc. This group has to have the band removed. In some cases, some of those problems CAN be attributed to what the bandster did and did not do...and in some cases, it just happens.

But then there's the 2nd group. That's the group who can't seem to make the behavioral changes to make the band work. Bandsters who PB too often but instead of getting the band loosened, or learn to eat very slowly and with small bites, or continue to eat the wrong foods (Pasta, breads) blame the band instead. PBing doesn't necessarily mean you're too tight...it means that you need to change your eating habits. Or bandsters who resort to "soft food syndrome" and then blame the band for not working. Bandsters who eat too close to bedtime and then blame the band for reflux problems. Bandsters who say that they're hungry all the time but haven't learned to differentiate between head hunger and true hunger...and then blame the band. Bandsters who don't get fills and unfills as needed. Bandsters who won't exercise. Bandsters who can't accept the fact that, yes, you really DO need to eat less than a 1000 cals/day to lose the weight.

Being banded means dealing with all of these "issues." I think that's why many people choose RNY. RNY does the weight loss FOR YOU. With maladsorption, you can continue to eat a lot of crap and still lose weight because your body isn't absorbing it. With banding, if you eat it, you WILL process and absorb it (unless you PB). But the sad thing is that the human body usually ADAPTS. So the RNY patient begins to regain weight because in many instances, he or she did NOT learn to deal with the head hunger or learn to eat more healthily.

Most of the time, when you read a post from someone who is unhappy with the band (we have a few on the board now), you can usually figure out WHY the band isn't working for them...and unfortunately, *most* of the time, it's because the bandster isn't doing what's needed. But let's face it...most of us really DO want an easy way out of obesity and we sure don't want to admit that it's our fault. I'd much rather be able to say that my obesity was due to thyroid problems, or PCOS, or Cushing's disease, or diabetes...instead of accepting the fact that I simply put too much food in my mouth. But even WITH any of those medical issues, if you reduce your calories enough, you WILL lose weight...but it ain't easy.

For those wanting additional support groups, try obesityhelp.com. Obesityhelp.com has forums for RNY, DS, lapband, plastic surgery, etc. Also forums for complications, patients who regret having the various types of WLS, and even a memorial page (and yes, there are stories there of deaths due to RNY).

There are also many, many Yahoo groups devoted to banding. Simply do a search on lapbanding and you'll find many.

[Iulizbug 0]

Absolutely NO regrets. The band has changed my life in so many ways and if it were to erode or slip tomorrow it all still would be worth it. I can eat like a normal person now, around 1500-1700 cal a day and nobody even knows I have a band. I now love to exercise and am full of energy:) Plus my body fat has gone from 44% to 19% and I am 6 lbs under my goal weight. Best thing I have ever done for myself!! :biggrin1: :biggrin1:

~Liz~

03/10/06

241/154/160

5'7 1/2 "

[DevilMayKare 1]

Bandsters who say that they're hungry all the time but haven't learned to differentiate between head hunger and true hunger...and then blame the band.

I think the question was if any of us have regrets.

Did the poster only want "No regrets" answers? I think you can see from this thread why many who have regrets don't post them. It's really a shame how this has turned into personal attacks.

I really don't want to go into pages of why this is something I wish I'd never done, but the statement above is worth noting. If I had had any idea that I would still feel so hungry after the band (even while still feeling that wonderful esophgeal choke) I would never have done it. If I still feel this head hunger how is this different from Weight Watchers or any other diet???

As with many diets I did really well at first. I went from 220 to 160 from 6/05 to 11/05. And now I'm back up to 220. I am perfectly willing to admit that I am a BIG, FAT FAILURE. I don't blame the band. Please believe I am heaped with more self-blame (& hatred) than anyone throwing stones can imagine.

I have failed. It is MY fault--again, again, again, as it ALWAYS has been. THe band has simply reinforced what I already knew. I just really did not need to pay $8,000 to know it yet again.

I'm sorry if my negativity upsets you. It upsets me too. Instead of getting on a train to TJ I feel like standing in front of one right now.

[beversman 0]

Absolutely NO regrets. The band has changed my life in so many ways and if it were to erode or slip tomorrow it all still would be worth it. I can eat like a normal person now, around 1500-1700 cal a day and nobody even knows I have a band. I now love to exercise and am full of energy:) Plus my body fat has gone from 44% to 19% and I am 6 lbs under my goal weight. Best thing I have ever done for myself!! :biggrin1: :biggrin1:

~Liz~

03/10/06

241/154/160

5'7 1/2 "

You've had awesome results. congrats! I hope to someday be in your shoes. Below goal... now that is something to think about.

I have always been good at losing the weight, but like many its the "keeping it off" that is the problem.

Hopefully... I will someday have a story like yours. It is something positive to keep me focused.

[tonya66 13]

As with many diets I did really well at first. I went from 220 to 160 from 6/05 to 11/05. And now I'm back up to 220. I am perfectly willing to admit that I am a BIG, FAT FAILURE. I don't blame the band. Please believe I am heaped with more self-blame (& hatred) than anyone throwing stones can imagine.

I have failed. It is MY fault--again, again, again, as it ALWAYS has been. THe band has simply reinforced what I already knew. I just really did not need to pay $8,000 to know it yet again.

I'm sorry if my negativity upsets you. It upsets me too. Instead of getting on a train to TJ I feel like standing in front of one right now.

I have a few questions for you:

When you say it is your fault, what do you mean, did you not eat right? I'm just curious so don't take my post wrong.

I'm not banded yet, and I take everyones experience to heart and try to learn from their experience. So you are a perfect example of someone that it worked for a short time and then wieght crept back on. Can you tell me why you think it came back? And if it is back, can you lose it again? Perhaps getting another fill?

One of the things I'm trying to do is NOT look at the band as a DIET, but as a tool to help me. I now it will not take away the head hunger, cravings, thats something we have to work on. However, it should take away the real hunger, right?

Just curious on what your feeling are on why you gained weight back?

[~Jules~ 0]

Personally, I don't think the band can take away head hunger. If I could get a band on my head, I probably would. Head hunger is one of my biggest issues. The band will help me with real hunger, but I am going to have to work on the head hunger myself.

Plus, the band is a tool. It isn't going to work for you if you make poor food choices. It will help with the volume of some poor choices, but won't help a bit with ice cream and other similar foods.

When researching for information about the band or any other WLS option, one certainly needs to read ALL the posts possible. There are possible problems, but in comparison to the other choices, the band is the best decision, hands down.

But we have to remember, it won't do it without our help. I know some of the other surgeries will do it without our help, but are much more dangerous.

[cinward2001 0]

I think the question was if any of us have regrets.

Did the poster only want "No regrets" answers? I think you can see from this thread why many who have regrets don't post them. It's really a shame how this has turned into personal attacks.

I really don't want to go into pages of why this is something I wish I'd never done, but the statement above is worth noting. If I had had any idea that I would still feel so hungry after the band (even while still feeling that wonderful esophgeal choke) I would never have done it. If I still feel this head hunger how is this different from Weight Watchers or any other diet???

As with many diets I did really well at first. I went from 220 to 160 from 6/05 to 11/05. And now I'm back up to 220. I am perfectly willing to admit that I am a BIG, FAT FAILURE. I don't blame the band. Please believe I am heaped with more self-blame (& hatred) than anyone throwing stones can imagine.

I have failed. It is MY fault--again, again, again, as it ALWAYS has been. THe band has simply reinforced what I already knew. I just really did not need to pay $8,000 to know it yet again.

I'm sorry if my negativity upsets you. It upsets me too. Instead of getting on a train to TJ I feel like standing in front of one right now.

Kare, none of my posts have been directed at any one person (except for my responses to Sue). I'm sorry if you feel that I've attacked anyone. That's not my intent.

But your post is a good example (I think) of what some people really need to know about the band. Banding doesn't help with head hunger and any emotional issues related to eating. None of the other WLSs do either, but, RNY and DS allow you to eat anyway and NOT deal with those issues. In the long run, though, that's really NOT a good thing.

The band is different from WW or other diets because it really DOES suppress physical hunger. It also limits the quantity that you can eat, and even what you can eat in many (but not all) things. WW doesn't do that. WW gives you dietary guidelines, but then, you get to fight physical AND head hunger while still able to eat pastas, bread, huge portions, etc...so with WW, it's ALL up to you. With the band, it does do some things for you.

I've experienced the "esophageal choke" that you mention. After my 3rd fill, I was pretty tight. I had thought, up until that fill, that I knew what restriction and being banded was like. I *thought* that I was eating carefully, slowly, and with small bites. What I found out was that I wasn't eating carefully enough, or with small enough bites. I had a pretty good learning curve there for a while. I'd take a very, very small bite of food (about the size of my pinky fingernail), chew it well, swallow, and then WAIT. Then I'd take another bite, and another...if I managed to take small enough bites when I first started eating, I could avoid that initial discomfort and tightness. For the rest of the meal, I didn't have to be quite so cautious. But there were plenty of times that I'd start a meal and then BAM! Pbing, pain, etc., and I'd have to walk away from the table hungry. But those instances really were MY fault. Once I learned how to manage the band, everything was fine again.

I hear your frustration and pain, Kare. I understand, too. I've been "stuck" at this weight for over 6 weeks now. Part of me hates that. Part of me really wants to get to goal (I'm less than 30 lbs away). Part of me doesn't care because I feel GOOD right now. Part of me is scared. If I can sabotage myself at this point with the band, what's to prevent me from sabotaging myself right back up to 260lbs?! So some days, I get out of bed thinking "Ok, no more junk! Time to get the rest of the weight off!" and that will last until early evening and then I go to bed thinking "Oh, crap, I really shouldn't have eaten that piece of pizza, or that chocolate...I'll do better tomorrow."

And those are the EXACT same thoughts I had at 260 lbs. Feeling like a failure because I messed up THIS day, too.

But hurting ourselves is PART of obesity. Every time we eat something that we shouldn't, we're trading a few minutes of instant gratification knowing that we'll hate ourselves a little for it later. We hurt ourselves both emotionally AND physically. We also feel hopeless. We think "Hell, this ain't working anyway, so I might as well eat that and enjoy it." We put ourselves in a nasty cycle...eat to feel better, then feel worse about it, so eat to feel better...

So how do we get ourselves OUT of this? For some, just getting the band is enough. The commitment that this is permanent and not a diet that can be dropped is enough to get them to goal. For others, it takes a LOT more. Some people need counselling. Some need anti-depressants AND counseling. And for some, they're just not ready to do what it takes to be successful with the band or otherwise.

For me, getting the band offered HOPE. I believed (and still do) that the band is a very effective tool for losing weight. It's helped me get to the point where I'm in "average" clothing, I'm no longer MO, I'm physically active, my cholesterol is normal, etc. But I also admit to myself that maybe I don't want those last 30 lbs quite enough...and that's not the band's failure. In fact, I don't even think of it as failure for me. I'm taking a break. The band is still helping. I might eat one piece of pizza, but not 3 or 4. I'm maintaining my weight whereas ANY other time I stalled with a diet, I immediately starting gaining again. The band is a constant reminder that I did this for a REASON. I really do NOT want to be obese and no chocolate in the world is worth how badly I felt 75 lbs ago. And I also know that being negative about this stall is NOT the way to get out of it. That's the old "diet trap". So I also look at this time to really think about why I'm doing what I'm doing, to think about my goals, and to focus on the GOOD things that I'm doing.

All this leads to another reason WHY I think banding is the best WLS to have. Most people didn't get fat and THEN start having self-esteem issues, or depression, or anger issues, anxieties, etc. In MOST cases, we had some kind of issues FIRST...and the obesity followed. So fixing the obesity through RNY or DS, while great because it takes care of so many physical problems (as long as it doesn't create any), doesn't make you fix the problems that got you to obesity in the first place. But then, trying to fix the issues while you are MO is really, really difficult...so the band helps with the weight loss, but it's up to us to work on the head/emotional issues right along with it.

[Jachut 487]

For me, getting the band offered HOPE. I believed (and still do) that the band is a very effective tool for losing weight. It's helped me get to the point where I'm in "average" clothing, I'm no longer MO, I'm physically active, my cholesterol is normal, etc. But I also admit to myself that maybe I don't want those last 30 lbs quite enough...and that's not the band's failure. In fact, I don't even think of it as failure for me. I'm taking a break. The band is still helping. I might eat one piece of pizza, but not 3 or 4. I'm maintaining my weight whereas ANY other time I stalled with a diet, I immediately starting gaining again. The band is a constant reminder that I did this for a REASON. I really do NOT want to be obese and no chocolate in the world is worth how badly I felt 75 lbs ago. And I also know that being negative about this stall is NOT the way to get out of it. That's the old "diet trap". So I also look at this time to really think about why I'm doing what I'm doing, to think about my goals, and to focus on the GOOD things that I'm doing.

Good Lord, have you been reading my mind? That is EXACTLY my feelings on the band and exactly where I'm at at the moment too.

I never went into this expecting it to be a miracle. I knew there were risks and problems and that I would have to work with it for it to be successful. I knew there was a high chance I'd not get right down to my goal weight. I've done the work, I can now run 10kms at a time, I'm extremely fit, but there's more I can do - I can now tackle the issue of decreasing body fat and increasing lean muscle rather than just lose weight. I can stop eating just "less" overall and start to really analyse my diet and eat in a very disciplined manner, but I have to decide whether I want to and whether its worth it when I can already shop in normal stores, I look completely normal, my BMI is 26 and I feel utterly fantastic about myself.

That to me is a successful outcome and I dont care what anybody says to the contrary, if I think I'm successful then I am. Maybe I can achieve more, maybe I wont, but I have no weight related health issues at all, I can run rings around most 25 year olds and nobody can change that fact with their sulky and nasty outlook on other people's happiness.

I have no problem with people talking about their regrets and problems they've experienced. But coming here as somebody said "with an axe to grind" insisting that the band is just problem fraught and unsuccessful on the whole, well that's just totally stupid and such people should just go and whinge elsewhere if you ask me. We're here to tackle real problems and to try to offer support to those who are experiencing them, and its valuable for doing headwork on ourselves to discuss these issues. But people with with NOTHING positive to say help nobody at all. Its not healthy to only focus on worst case scenarios, its not realistic, its just not how normal people think. And when it comes down to tin tacks, this is a lap band forum and if anybody feels so badly about the lapband and has put it behind her it beats me why on earth they'd hang around. Just to take out their disillusionment and bad take on life in general on everybody else is my guess.

[CLAUDIAGDLMEX 0]

hi I just have a question . what type of band did you get . I know there are 3 diffent ones . Pls advise . My surgery is 12-06-06 and any information from anyone is help full .