Lying about Weight Loss Surgery !

[Ms.AntiBand 2,984]

Oops.. I mean *scrape

[Sadtosaygoodbye 256]

People who pose these types of questions or statements, only want to hear "their" views echoed. So if you are not part of the echo chamber, you are just as flawed as their so called "Friends".

[No game 14,437]

Or they like to see the fight! I saw this one for what it was a mile away!

[newat52 1,613]

People who pose these types of questions or statements, only want to hear "their" views echoed. So if you are not part of the echo chamber, you are just as flawed as their so called "Friends".

I agree. I went back and re read most of the OP's posts and they are all the same. Clearly she really didn't want to hear any other opinions other than her own and just wanted to say the same thing over and over with a nice little dig at the end of most of them for most anyone who had a differing view.

After re reading the posts, I really just feel sad for her. There has to be a lot of insecurity there. Hope the best for her.

[Sadtosaygoodbye 256]

newat52 My mother used to tell me when I was younger, "Don't go to class with all the answers, when you don't know the course materials". So when you approach a situation and you have the answers already, you can never truly "Learn" from that situation. I think we have a case of that here.

[newat52 1,613]

newat52 My mother used to tell me when I was younger, "Don't go to class with all the answers, when you don't know the course materials". So when you approach a situation and you have the answers already, you can never truly "Learn" from that situation. I think we have a case of that here.

Indeed. Your mother is a wise woman.

[sarahzamudio1091 185]

Oh' date=' come on ... we're just getting to the good part of kissing and making up ...

And sadly ... this very topic will be hashed out again in one form or another in a new thread in just a couple weeks.[/quote']

Yeah I was in rants and raves threads and didnt see that this exact same thread was started a couple weeks ago . Oops but people actually ran her off the whole forum I think lol. Well im still here ha !!

[sarahzamudio1091 185]

I agree. I went back and re read most of the OP's posts and they are all the same. Clearly she really didn't want to hear any other opinions other than her own and just wanted to say the same thing over and over with a nice little dig at the end of most of them for most anyone who had a differing view.

After re reading the posts' date=' I really just feel sad for her. There has to be a lot of insecurity there. Hope the best for her.[/quote']

No need to feel sad . I'm as happy as can be

[Misty_eyes 79]

Wow ... this topic ... again ...

Outside of the 3rd week stall thread' date=' this has to be one of the most oft discussed thing here. HERE is the last one if anyone cares to read some history.

I don't understand why people, both sleeved and those not sleeved, can't understand why this is a personal decision and if I choose to keep it personal, that is my choice.

Please respect that.

I don't directly lie to people about it, telling people I do Water aerobics or something, but for the most part, I tell them I have decreased my portion sizes and exercise more. All of which is true. I started out having a similar attitude as the OP, but after being knocked down a couple times, I was like, "What business is it of theirs anyway?"

If I noticed a woman's bust line being different, would I ask them if they had a reduction or enhancement?

Why am I obligated to divulge my life?

As I have posted on this topic numerous times, I will copy and paste my theory on this:

It's like we are supposed to have some obligation to society about our lives. As I explained in another thread along this very topic, I:

[*]

Didn't tell anyone I was having a vasectomy to help me control my family size

[*]

Didn't tell anyone I had lasik surgery to help me control my eyesight

[*]

Didn't tell anyone I had hemorrhoidectomy to help my ... well, ya know ...

Why do I have to tell them my life story? This is my life, gosh darn it!

Very well said!!!!!!!

[Misty_eyes 79]

And people.. Please stop insinuating that we are embarrassed' date=' selfish, ashamed or worse.. We don't have close friends!?! Seriously? ... Really?!?

My WLS does not dominate my daily life. I am (we) are not LYING about anything and not telling others is not selfish, fact, (sorry if i step on toes or egos) I think it's more self centered to think everyone wants to know all about you and your WLS.

I agree, PdxMan.. the topic is well covered. [/quote']

Super like and I agree! It's my life ... And it's my business. It is MY choice whatever I want to say, or what I don't want to say!

[Susysleever 265]

I'm pre-op. All I'm going to say is "I went to Mexico". Period.

[SeriJ 16]

Before surgery I didn't want to tell ANYONE other than my parents and my roommate. Now a week out, I'm much more comfortable with telling people. I didn't want to tell anyone before because face it. people make the stupidest remarks unintentionally at times, and I didn't want their questions and comments to fuel my own fears and insecurities about the decision. Most people that are not close to me I've simply told I'm having surgery and if they are rude enough to ask "what kind", I say a surgery that will help me get some health issues under control and straighten out my hormones. Then I change the subject. Sorry, but it really is none of their business, and I personally am appalled every time I tell someone I'm having surgery and they ask "what for". This is seriously rude to me, but I understand that not everyone has the same view of "rude" as I do, so I just brush it off.

I've since told most of my family and a few more close friends, but general people in my life don't need to know. I don't need to know about their surgeries or health issues.

I agree that lying about having cancer or something of that level is wrong, because it creates emotions and reactions that are difficult for OTHER people. Purposely giving someone else a reason to worry about you is...wow, yeah, very wrong. Fudging the personal details of the surgery to avoid opinions, comments and judgements I have no issues with.

If anyone has a tantrum over me having "lied" to them by not giving exact details, that's ok. The reason they were lied to in the first place was because of their nosiness, rudeness and lack of respect.

[Butterflyhigh 504]

I dislike when people think they know what is best for everyone else. I really dislike when they apply their personal life situations and choices to other people's life situations and choices.

Why all the judgment? Can't you just be comfortable with your own decisions without judging someone else for theirs?

Small minds can't see beyond their own.

[BellaHugz 331]

Everyone has their own feeling and strong opinions about who needs to know what about themselves. I didn't tell and don't plan on disclosing my personal issues with others. Just like I didn't tell others (even though very proud of him), I don't go around telling others about my husband vasectomy. Nor do I tell others about my surgery for a prolasped uterus due to (proudly), having 3 ten pound babies. I also didn't tell others about a wart I had removed from my butt when I was in jr high.. Oh and I don't tell people my front tooth is fake, due to a friend pushing my face into a Water fountain when I was in fourth grade. I'm not ashamed of anything I do or have. I just think its no ones business or for the fact... others probably don't give a $ H I T anyway!

This made me laugh so hard i had to hold my side!!

I agree everyone has their own personal reason for telling the truth or not telling. If you have experience any kind of judgement before about weight you have learned it is better to keep your mouth shut because thouse that learn the personal surgery you have often want to chime in at every moment they can on what you eat and how you look. I rather have the people i love know and the people I dont love dont need to know..

[3bandds 4]

I am generally perplexed by the "I tell everyone my business and think others should too" mentality. Everyone is different & unique, everyone has their own reasons, feelings, likes and dislikes re: disclosure. I am just pro autonomy. We're not clones.