Jump to content
×
Are you looking for the BariatricPal Store? Go now!

My marriage sucks



Recommended Posts

We had a huge fight lastnight' date=' I told him if he leaves his job I will file for divorce. I became a mom at 19 and worked my butt off. I bought my very own house at 25. Almost 6 years in and I'm going to lose it all. We are hs sweethearts and got reunited years later. The guy I remember was hard working, now all he is is a loser. I'm so torn with this. He knows I've pawned my stuff and now says he won't do anything stupid. I don't believe. We have a lot of friends in common and they all say leave. When I am ever going to get this game of life right??[/quote']

It sounds like you've made up you mind, maybe?

No one here can tell you what you should do, but we can support you as you go through what you're going through.

Amanda Rae

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I take issue with that sentiment...just because someone stays in a relationship with you when you were fat (whether he/she loves you or not) does not mean you "owe" them some sort of loyalty...you say that as if being fat is some kind of moral failure or defect...I could somewhat see your point if you had said something like "he stood by your side when you battled cancer..." also in some cases' date=' like when a spouse keeps changing jobs, it is a deliberate choice being made and not something like getting an illness, gaining weight, getting laid off when your employer goes bankrupt[/quote']

I don't even like the "cancer" reference. Why wouldn't your spouse stand beside you through cancer? Maybe he/she stood beside you through "addiction and recovery" as there is a choice about whether or not to use and then subsequently abuse.... But then that could tie back into food addiction... Sigh. How about we just use the marriage vows. "For better, or worse."

Amanda Rae

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I say leave! It's clear that You have tried to make things work! But let's be honest it takes 2! And he seems not to be trying. I'm sorry but it seems like he needs to grow the hell up!! He has a family to care for! Why is he wanting to leave his job?! Does he not know how hard it is to find a good job!?

Me and my husband have issues but He takes care of home! I will give him that. His job closed down 3 years ago but he took another job that same week. It didn't pay like we were used to but it was a start. Now with all his raises we are making almost the same. However he hates this job with a passion! He is steady looking for another one. He has even done job interviews out of state! That's how bad he wants to change but he knows he can't just up and leave his current job and he wouldn't even if he could. I just don't understand men that don't want to take care of home! My brother in law is the same way. He always wants to change jobs and let m sister take care of everything.

Hopefully everything works out but if he leaves his Job without another one lined up he would be on his own!!

What she said, it is a matter of maturity and simply being the head of the house hold. He is the male and thus should act accordingly. If he doesn't want to work then it's time for you to make the hard decision read the quote below. You deserve to be happy and that doesn't mean it will be with him.

If she's amazing, she won't be easy

If she's easy, she won't be amazing

If she's worth it, you won't give up

If you give up, your not worthy

Truth is everybody is going to hurt you; you just got to find the ones worth suffering for.

So ask yourself this question is he worth suffering for?

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

  • Trending Products

  • Trending Topics

  • Recent Status Updates

    • cryoder22

      Day 1 of pre-op liquid diet (3 weeks) and I'm having a hard time already. I feel hungry and just want to eat. I got the protein and supplements recommend by my program and having a hard time getting 1 down. My doctor / nutritionist has me on the following:
      1 protein shake (bariatric advantage chocolate) with 8 oz of fat free milk 1 snack = 1 unjury protein shake (root beer) 1 protein shake (bariatric advantage orange cream) 1 snack = 1 unjury protein bar 1 protein shake (bariatric advantace orange cream or chocolate) 1 snack = 1 unjury protein soup (chicken) 3 servings of sugar free jello and popsicles throughout the day. 64 oz of water (I have flavor packets). Hot tea and coffee with splenda has been approved as well. Does anyone recommend anything for the next 3 weeks?
      · 1 reply
      1. NickelChip

        All I can tell you is that for me, it got easier after the first week. The hunger pains got less intense and I kind of got used to it and gave up torturing myself by thinking about food. But if you can, get anything tempting out of the house and avoid being around people who are eating. I sent my kids to my parents' house for two weeks so I wouldn't have to prepare meals I couldn't eat. After surgery, the hunger was totally gone.

    • buildabetteranna

      I have my final approval from my insurance, only thing holding up things is one last x-ray needed, which I have scheduled for the fourth of next month, which is my birthday.

      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • BetterLeah

      Woohoo! I have 7 more days till surgery, So far I am already down a total of 20lbs since I started this journey. 
      · 1 reply
      1. NeonRaven8919

        Well done! I'm 9 days away from surgery! Keep us updated!

    • Ladiva04

      Hello,
      I had my surgery on the 25th of June of this year. Starting off at 117 kilos.😒
      · 1 reply
      1. NeonRaven8919

        Congrats on the surgery!

    • Sandra Austin Tx

      I’m 6 days post op as of today. I had the gastric bypass 
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
  • Recent Topics

  • Hot Products

  • Sign Up For
    Our Newsletter

    Follow us for the latest news
    and special product offers!
  • Together, we have lost...
      lbs

    PatchAid Vitamin Patches

    ×