Oakleygirl 53 Posted February 14, 2013 Now that I have made the decision to be sleeved and I have approval from the dr. (Mexico/self pay), I just feel like I can't wait another day! The somewhat acceptable image I had of myself prior to deciding to do VSG has turned into a real self-loathing... I don't know how I will stand myself until July?! In some ways, feeling this way has helped to reassure me that this is the right thing to do and perhaps it is the first time in a LONG time that I have actually really "looked" at myself - I hardly recognize the very big and square middle-aged woman I have become... I had always felt younger than my age, but this weight is turning me into someone I don't even know and I don't like her! I work in a very "visible" profession and have to dress up each day, but I only have 3 outfits that fit me now... now that I am not ignoring my size, I can see how my size affects my confidence and my desire to wear anything other than black. I hate all my clothes feeling tight and just not being able to move the way I want to. I am just DONE with being obese... and I can't wait! Sadly, my job has rigid vacation time frames so I have to go in July or else I would be on a plane tomorrow... Anyway, sorry for the natterings of an impatient "pre-op" sleever... did anyone else feel this way? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Ms.AntiBand 2,984 Posted February 14, 2013 I understand how you feel. Once I made my decision I couldn't leave fast enough. I was so depressed and self loathing. I hated myself for not having any clothes left to wear. I was borrowing clothes because I refused to go buy anything bigger than I had available. I still hide in clothes that are too big for me, but I feel so amazing because I am eating so healthy now and know I'm well on my way to a better me Good luck and keep your chin up. It's going to get a lot better from here on out Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
doreyrae 20 Posted February 14, 2013 I can totally relate. I am scheduled March 30 and the anticipation is driving me insane. I went through all my clothes and have piles of them. If I am not wearing them in the next month, then I don't need them. So I am left with hardly nothing considering all that I pulled out were either to big or to small. Good luck on your journey. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
xsammy 27 Posted February 15, 2013 Oakleygirl, you and I are sooo much alike, I was reading your thread and nodding along. I'm not able to have surgery until July either (darn 6 month diet) and feel like I'm bursting out of my limited wardrobe that still fits. I've decided the only way I won't go crazy obsessing about the wait is if I spend the time doing everything I can to prepare--that means doing the best I can on the preop diet, starting to exercise, reading on this site, etc. We will get there! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
amytug 996 Posted February 15, 2013 I was all set and ready to go to mx last may. I could see the light at the end of the tunnel and I was on cloud 9. I was applying for my passport when my dh told me he was afraid he'd lose his job, and didnt think it was a good time to get sirgery. I was crushed. I actually posted about my heartbreak here on the boards. I sank into a deep depression and left the boards. Ff to October, I came back and started the process, knowing that I couldn't go until the tax return was in. I didnt think I'd be able to wait FOUR months more. I kept telling myself that the next four months would fly. And it really REALLY did. I'm now 2 weeks away from the day I leave and I just can't hardly believe it!! The time will fly by. (Hug) Share this post Link to post Share on other sites