A thread for Single Bandsters

[gyfts 0]

Hi everyone! Im new to LBT, and just found this thread. What a great thread!! Im 46, by just a few days, and single. I was in a long term relationship until 18 months ago, it had lasted about 4 yrs, then my ex decided one day that he wasnt going to call anymore, wasnt going to return my phone calls, wasnt going to see me anymore, with no explanations I might add. Needless to say I was devastated. Now, Im just starting to try the dating game again, but geeessshh its difficult. I know that I have to love myself, before I can love anyone else, or expect them to love me. So thats why Im concentrating on me right now. Dating is fun, but nerve wracking at times too. Ive just decided to do the lap band, concentrate on getting me healthy physically, and i think in turn that will help with the emotional part as well. One step at a time. Congratulations to all of you and your new journeys to your weight loss and dating lives!! :clap2: :clap2:

[KristiB 1]

gyfts welcome to singles, and hopefully welcome to bandland, it takes some getting used to, but by and far, (its only been 3 months for me, tho) it has been worth it.

Woots(Joan) sorry to hear bout all your problems, I know that had to hurt, such a sensitive area. It really is good you got all of that taken care of though, now only a year, you can save up money and vacation time to prepare for it, buy that new treadmill and get it ready for post banding, cause believe me you will need it to help work out the gas pains in your shoulders.

Thank you everybody for your encouragement and support- I only have 18 or 19 stitches. 4 or 5 deep stitches in the fatLOL and 13 on the skin. They are far apart though, so if they had put them closer like I thought they were, there probably would have been 40 or so. I was going to go to work today, but last night at wal fart getting the gauze and stuff, both of my legs swelled very large and tight like watermelons. And they were berry berry itchy!!! So's I stayed home. Boring....

Watched Smallville season 5 episodes all day(got it for Christmas)...

I am going to try to put pics with my profile, so if you want to see the gruesome stitches, feel free.

oh yeah, since I have been home and bored, and not working out, I don't think I will be making my mini goal tomorrow.

Happy VD!

Kristi

[NewBeginnings2018 81]

Happy Valentine's Day (or Black Wednesday if you prefer) everyone!! Welcome to the thread gyfts, and I'm glad to hear you're feeling better KrisiB!

So I had another date last night, and it was another good one. He brought me a beautiful bouquet of flowers, and he was a very nice, sweet guy. We will definitely be going out again.

I may not be having Jodie-type fun yet, but I am having fun! lol

[ser123 0]

Happy Valentine's Day everyone!

I got a rose from my boss (we all did), am getting flowers from a friend and a secret admirer text message. Woohoo!

[j_war06 0]

Im hoping for a "great" V-Day night, make a couple of phone calls....most likely the stripper would be hotter on VDay right? LOL! Im so bad! I did a special thing for my friend for Valentine's day, I went and bought a bunch of stuff and put it in a baggy for him. he and his ex-bf are still broken up, and he just cant get over it.......so I bought a lot of cool stuff plus roses to give to him. I like to do that sort of thing for others...

As for me, I bought myself some flowers and am taking myself out for dinner (maybe) and probably do homework until one of my boys comes over.....You know, it doesnt even bother me that much that Im my own Valentine......just sickening to see all the other mushy crap!

[ser123 0]

Jodie you are wearing that hat in your avatar because you have so many studs to break, LOL! Have fun with your booty calls!

[TexasRose 0]

Happy Valentine's Day!

Okay Kids....how do you handle dating multiple people at once?

I have always been the one guy at a time, conclude dating relationship, then on to the next. Perhaps it is a guilt complex that I feel like I am cheating if I am going out with more than one at a time.

You would think that being 35 and dating since 14 that I would have a better handle on it - but this just seems to be difficult for me to not become attached quickly.

Thoughts?

Tiffany

[j_war06 0]

I dont get attached because well actually i dont know a friend of mine and I were talking about this earlier.....but I guess that I kno Im not actually official with any of them, that I dont feel bad ??? Maybe its because I know none of them are THE ONE, so I dont care ??? Maybe I was so hurt by my last relationship that Im afraid to have feelings for someone else, so it doesnt matter.....

But I know that Im not actually pinned to one guy, so I dont really care....I really lack on the feelings side tho....I suppose Im still waiting around until my ex and I decide to settle down again? And Im just occupying my time....many things to consider

Frankly, it doesnt even really bother me to see them flirt with other chicks....but thats because I know that at the end of the night, if I work it, they will come home with me

I would actually consider dating the stripper (if we were talking about just meeting and no fooling around at first ya know?) He really is caring and a good guy, believe it or not, its the truth....he calls or texts me every day just to say hi...not to come over.....so that says a lot really

[NewBeginnings2018 81]

Tiffany at this point I'm just casually dating - nothing serious - nor has any relationship turned physical yet, other than a make out session here or there. lol. I've dated like this before and usually one relationship will make it further than the rest and I'll cut the other ones off. It's a lot of work though, I'll say that. You get good at juggling. lol

Jodie - I think him texting and calling you every day does say a lot. You never know. In a year we'll be seeing pics of the Jodie-Stripper wedding. lol

[ser123 0]

I think a stripper might be fun for a while but my thought would be, I am not taking this guy home to meet my dad/colleagues/family. I can't help but think with both men and women, why would you do that job? He may get a lot of props for being sexy but there is so much more to life than just being sexy. And he may be a lot more than sexy but I think most people would allow the job he does overshadow anything else about him. I don't think he is doing any service to himself by being a stripper.

So I guess my thing would be, yes he may want me and be texting me and even be a nice guy, but do I really want him as a boyfriend. I would probably have to say no.

But then again, I may end up as a Scary Old Dog Lady....

[ser123 0]

As far as dating multiple people, I am kind of like Chrispy. One of the dates generally becomes the guy I am interested in.

I kind of use the rule of 3s when I am dating.

The first 3 dates are free... meaning if they don't call or I don't call after the first 3 dates, then no harm and no foul. I don't think an explanation is necessary. After 3 dates, if I am not interested, I feel obligated to inform them of that. A corollary to that is that I don't do anything on the first 3 dates where I feel like I would be mad if they didn't call me again. Like sleeping with someone.

After 3 weeks of dating I think there is usually enough information for me to tell whether I want to be mutually exclusive with someone. If they don't want to be mutually exclusive after 3 weeks, then that is fine but I move on. This is not negotiable to me.

After 3 months I can usually tell if I want to be in a more serious relationship with someone. If I don't, then I cut my losses. I don't hang in and hang in a relationship that I don't think is going anywhere.

So that is the Susan's Rule of 3s dating strategy.

[MissyC 0]

Glad Valentines day is over. (to borrow a christmas phrase)...BAH HUMBUG.

Kim, nice to meet you. Keep us posted on your band journey.

Kristi, I live in Shady Shores tx, north of Denton. But have close friends in Durant and Kingston that I visit fairly regularly.

Ps...glad your leg is doing better.

me<<< >>>>>getting a kick out of other ppls dating stories.:roll:

[j_war06 0]

oh no! Im not interested in actually dating the stripper....however he does have another job and he goes to college...its not like that is his only source of income. He is actually a respectable guy, and I would even let my parents meet him...

As for Bartender, I spent the night there last night and all day today...I know he is a man whore, or I pretty much suspect it of him lol! BUT he is offering me a lot....however Im not going to take it as more than a compliment, I will not actually do it because Im not comfortable enough with my body..........let me get to the point....he wants me to be a dancer, and by dancer I mean a pretty word for stripper! ITS SO FLATTERING! He was telling me how much money I could make! He wants to be my agent of sorts (thats how stripping works)......I think its sooooo weird because thats definately one thing Ive never heard before in my life! Dont you guys think that is strange? He says that if i stick with him, then he will pay for anything I want....he wants to pay for my breast implants (which I mentioned, not him) and anything else I want...he wanted to take me shopping today! Just because! But I didnt have time because of work! Im so still in shock! He wants to take care of me, and he wants me to quit my job I have now...which i cant because I just started and I like it enough not to quit, however I cant help but let that linger in the back of my mind.........someone actually thinks I could be a stripper!

[gyfts 0]

Im with chrissy ...BAH HUMBUG on valentines. Im just wondering how do all you ladies meet so many guys? Im 46, and dont have a clue how to meet men anymore. Ive lived a sheltered life for too long!!:help: However, it is fun to read about everyone's dating lives. Im living my life through all of you, and giving myself something to dream about . :bandit

[NewBeginnings2018 81]

Jodie there is no doubting that someone thinking you can be a stripper is a HUGE compliment in its own way, although I'm not sure how I'd take it if I knew they were serious about it and wanted to be my pimp. lol

Kim - I've met my guys doing online dating. It's not an easy system to navigate. You have to beware of the guys who are just looking to "get some" but you do learn how to distinguish between them, especially if you don't "give it" right away. lol. I've met some very nice men, and have stayed friends with many of them.

So last night I had my second date with my bad boy, or tatoo man as my friends and I have dubbed him. And I have to admit - I'm a bit smitten. lol. I also told him about my band. Ever since I considered getting the band I have been freaking out about how I would tell a guy once we started dating. He and I have great conversation, and have shared a lot, so I figured I'd tell him. He said it didn't bother him, but when we spoke this morning he had done all kinds of research on it. lol. He's curious about it, and said he's glad to know because he wants to help me succeed, but I think he may be a little skeptical about it. But at least the cat is out of the bag and we'll see how it goes!

Hope everyone else is doing well and enjoying the weekend!