Boundaries! Get out my damn plate!

[imlosingit 130]

Okay so I been wanting to get this crap off of my chest for a few weeks. Why is it that people who know you've had surgery are so OBSESSED with what and how much you are eating?!?!? Example, a co worker of mine knows (along with the rest of the building) that I've been sleeved. Last week I was headed out to get lunch and she asked me if I wanted leftover Soup from a meeting she hosted. Sure, I took the soup, who wouldn't take that over going out into -9 degree weather to get some food? After all, eating is NOT fun anymore. I eat because I have to avoid this pest called "starvation". At any rate, we have a monthly building meeting where lunch is provided and yesterday was the time for that meeting. What did they have? chicken Enchiladas, Refried Beans, lettuce rice and all the fixings. I had already purposed in my mind that I would have beans with a little sour cream and a small piece of enchilada. Well, as I am standing in line she sashays her nosey a** over to me and says "I have more soup if you want it" ARGGHHH! If looks could kill she would have fell over dead. I am 35 years old, I can manage my own plate. I looked at her and said "I don't want any soup!!" and no I didn't say it nicely because this same lady is ALWAYS inquiring about my eating!!!! She turned beet red! I was so pissed! I am quite CAPABALE of having a meal! I CAN eat regular food! I get sick of her and people like her monitoring my plate! They dont know how much we struggle and how slow we must eat or what we can eat or anything else about being sleeved. I am sick and tired of all these butt nuggets in my office to be quite frank..... they need to MIND THIER OWN BUSINESS!!! That is all.... thanks for reading. I am now accepting suggestions for snarky, snide comments that will be reapeated lol

[No game 14,437]

Butt. Nuggets... Hehehehe!

Oh and I hate when they ask EVERYDAY how much have you lost now? 0_o

[johnlatte 1,232]

This is one of the reasons, why I haven't mentioned my surgery too much. People sometimes have this weird interest in how much weight you are losing and what you are eating. I don't think that they do it intentionally but still it is annoying.

Laura said Butt. Nuggets.. snort.

[Jen35 283]

Love it!!

When people know about the surgery, they somehow think that we need their advice (and everyone else's). I have a friend who I told that I am going to get VSG. She started selling HerbalLife and sat me down and went over their diet program that she thought could help me. I didn't go off on her because she was being very sweet and I know where her heart is. But she made a comment about how she was worried about me getting surgery. She knows my brother (who had VSG 2 years ago, was very successful and had NO problems) and she mentioned that he can't eat what he wants, he is limited in how much he can eat. I told her that, yes - that's how he lost weight. But he eats whatever he wants and has kept off 150 lbs for 2 years. I'm thinking "And your diet in which I am replacing 2 of my meals with shakes ISN'T limiting what or how much I would eat?" Many people who don't know about VGS, have a knee jerk reaction that is not even logical. Same thing after surgery, this automatic thinking that we need all the help we can get.

[gmanbat 5,889]

Loved your post!

By the looks of it you don't need any help defending yourself.

Some suggestions:

I can't eat finger food, I'm so hungry I might bite them off.

Thanks for your concern about my eating. How are your bowel movements?

I have to stop at the pet store for some new gold fish. I fried up the old ones last night.

I have to wear a mask in the summer. I'm afraid I'll breathe in a gnat and wreck my diet.

Could you sit with me at lunch? I'm afraid (food name) might not sit well and I need help cleaning up the projectile vomiting.

Yes, my diet is going well. My love life is ok too except I only have enough energy for 2 kisses and one longing gaze.

[Jen35 283]

Thanks for your concern about my eating. How are your bowel movements?

I have to stop at the pet store for some new gold fish. I fried up the old ones last night.

I'm using these!!

[imlosingit 130]

OMG!!! I am laughing so hard right now!!!! Glad you all understand, this is just another reason why I love VST!

Thanks for your concern about my eating. How are your bowel movements?

I have to stop at the pet store for some new gold fish. I fried up the old ones last night.

I have to wear a mask in the summer. I'm afraid I'll breathe in a gnat and wreck my diet

I am def using these!!!!! lmbo!!!!! :lol: :lol: :lol:

[angelamarie79 41]

Ahhhahahah I love the one about the gnat!! Def gonna use that one!!

[Newme4ever 12]

Bahahaha ...I needed this good laugh I have to tell you Gmanbat and Laura Ven you guys make me smile and laugh a lot .. Thanks!!!!! I was having a crappy blah day .

[No game 14,437]

Bahahaha ...I needed this good laugh I have to tell you Gmanbat and Laura Ven you guys make me smile and laugh a lot .. Thanks!!!!! I was having a crappy blah day .

Crappy as in "butt nugget" day???

[Nicolanz 1,484]

I'm sorry about your dilemma but you are hilarious! I laughed during the whole post partly because I completely understand and mostly because of your wording! Haha. My coworkers are always making fun of the amount of food I eat!

[1happyloser2b 39]

That's the reason, imlosingit that I am not telling anyone at work I have told family members and ever some of them are not supportive. Based on ur ticker u r doing very well. They are just jealous!!! Tell them " I got this!!!" Then SMILE real BIG!!!!!!

[VSGKirk 855]

My co-workers are all in my business because a ) They care b ) I invited them in. But then again, we were all in each other's business before surgery and we are all full of advice for each other (and it's a boundriless free-for-all). I love it (even when they are keeping me real!). You're sassy Imlosingit, you go girl!

[imlosingit 130]

Thanks you all! This has made me feel SO much better, lol!!! VSGKirk, I am so glad you have the support you do.... the turds here just get on my nerves! You're right 1happyloser2b! For the first time, I do feel as though "I got this"! NicoleAnz, make sure you use some of gmanbat's "snarkiness" hahaha!!!!

[Puja 148]

Imlosing it, I completely understand where you are coming from!

I was overweight my whole life (it's awesome to say that in the past tense), and felt like there was always someone watching my plate to see what I ate or how much of it I ate. That paranoia continued on post-op, and is still there, even though I hit goal a few months ago.

But you know what I realized? A lot of these people who seem to be overly concerned about my dietary intake actually genuinely care for me, and don't know how else to show their support. It was me who assumed someone was still trying to criticize me or my food choices. Now, it's very heartwarming when someone makes a special dish that they think I can eat. Most people don't actually know the ins and outs of the surgery, they don't realize that I can eat whatever I want.

My boyfriend's mum saw me sipping on a Protein shake a week out of surgery, and thought that was how I would live the rest of my life. So, the next time I visited her, she had stocked her cupboards with juices and Protein powders. It irritated me, but I realized she was trying to be supportive in her own way. So, I sat her down and explained to her how I would slowly incorporate normal foods back into my diet.

I live with my parents, and my dad still asks me when I will eat "like a normal person". He doesn't want to ruffle my feathers, he just wants to make sure I'm happy and satisfied with the variety in my diet.

Of course, this lady you are working with might seriously be an evil woman who wants to put you down and upset you...but there is also the possibility that she respects your decision, and wants to help you out. Good luck to you!