How do you get over feeling like this is crazy?

[MelissaGG 9]

I am pretty new here but not new to WLS. I was banded almost 10 years ago and I was not successful at any point. Most of the time I was unfilled or mostly unfilled. I recently began to have p Robles and found a surgeon in my are who did a fluoroscope and said all seems fine. I am starting to get a little terrified thinking I left this in too long and perhaps it has eroded. I found another surgeon and will be calling to make an appointment soon. I am going to insist on checking for erosion and also consider revision. The only thing certain is that I want this freakin band out of my body and I am terrified of surgery and my son losing his Mom. Really, I know it seems far-fetched but it is how I feel. I am the sole support for my family, have a good career and need to stick around. I am a bundle of nerves over this.

Secondly, I chose the lap band so they would not have to cut my digestive tract, If I was not having pain right now, I would leave it in and forget it existed and never look at WLS again. I am now hearing that they have a 10 year max expiration date...wonderful! So I am deeply thinking about VSG and I can't stop thinking that it is nuts. Please don't be offended, I do not mean any offense against anyone. I am just trying to wrap. My mind around the possibility. I rode the train home tonight and kept asking myself when does the "insanity" of cutting an organ in half to lose weight become not an "insanity" but a reasonable choice and reality?

I know that is pretty deep but I can't talk to anyone I know about it. They are all like..."diet and exercise" and no wls. I have tried, and tried and worked out and ran and I already eat healthy food, no soda, lots of veggies. I can't spend 2 plus hours in the gym, I have compulsion to eat more food than I should. For example, last nights dinner was kale salad with cranberries and pumpkin seeds and I ate 3 servings, then I had 2 stuffed peppers with turkey and quinoa that I made. Not bad food, but far too much and I feel like I can't stop. So given that I can not commit to several hours per day in the gym at the moment, but I can commit to 4 days for an hour each time with room for the late meeting I think I need some help and perhaps the vsg is the way to go.?

How did you think through it? Was it an easy decision? We're you scared? Did you feel you had any other alternative? I know the trade off is giving up or fooling myself into thinking that "one day, I will find the right balance and magic formula of exercise and diet" and that will be it and I will sustain for a lifetime. Would love your thoughts...and remember, I know that's chose some harsh words but they are helpful in me working through my feelings.

[No game 14,437]

Hi! I've never had the band but I know that if you go to the menu and scroll down you will find a band to sleeve revision forum! There are a lot of people that have had it!

Oh and I thought about getting the band but felt there was to many complications

[The.new.g 48]

That is a very interesting question. In a way, I don't think I ever did get over thinking it's crazy, either when I was banded or now...I guess I just got more comfortable with the idea that I had a serious problem and it called for a serious solution. The data is compelling to me. I see the statistics for non-surgical weight loss (what all of us tried before WLS) and surgical weight loss and the data is compelling. Of course, it's also hard because the data that was available when we were banded wasn't exactly how things turned out for many of us. But I didn't want RNY then and I don't want it now...so I get over the "crazy" part by looking at the numbers and my own history and my family history of obesity.

I hope that helps. Interesting "food for thought!"

[joatsaint 2,814]

When I was making my decision, my main though was, "It's been 36 years of trying to diet on my own. Are things getting better or worse?" And, "Do I want to be this fat or fatter this time next year?" I could only see things deteriorating from here on out.

I was scared, nervous and completely unsure. It doesn't mater how many video testimonials or posts from happy sleevers I saw, it was still hard to believe it would work for me.

I realized a long time ago that there was no magic formula, pill or exercise program that was going to work for me. All those empty promises on late night weight loss infomercials had me burnt out and jaded. They are all selling the same thing, HOPE.

If weight loss was so easy, then half the US population would not be overweight and the diet industry wouldn't be raking in billions each year selling us pills, eating plans, hypnosis tapes, and workout DVDs.

At 34 days out, I am very happy with my sleeve and I would do it all over again if I had to.

[femgem 2]

Hi Melissa...

I am new here also. My Sleeve surgery is in March. I never considered the Band myself, after having a friend be so unsuccessful with it and me not wanting the foreign object in my body. Gastric Bypass, however, I have wanted for many years!! I finally have insurance to cover it! When I read about the Sleeve and how less invasive it was (no malnutrition and no cutting into everything), I have decided that is the right choice for me. I am in no way fearful or hesitant; I am overwhelmed with anticipation and excitement for a "new me"!! I way 250lbs. I have high blood pressure, am pre-diabetic, and my knees hurt soooo bad. It is virtually impossible to exercise. But years ago, I loved to power walk 3 miles a day, play tennis, volleyball, etc... I look forward to the weight loss so I can be active again! And I know I cannot do it on my own. I have tried every diet out there, along with therapy, hypnosis, shots, etc... VSG Is the best choice for me! I have yet to hear from anyone that they regret their WLS decision.

Anyhow... not sure if I have helped at all, but thought I would chime in I wish you the very best in your journey!!!

Warmly,

Lee

[lucky8mb1 167]

For me, it was just time that helped me get over the "this is crazy" feeling. I truly couldn't believe I was willingly going to lop off 3/4 of a "healthy" organ, that I was going to alter the rest of my life so significantly with this permanent decision.

However, now I'm 7.5 weeks out and living what is a normal life for people who haven't battled with their weight their entire lives. food doesn't own me anymore. I eat small portions throughout the day. I make smarter food decisions - selecting things like Proteins over empty carbs and sugary Snacks. Yes, I can't eat the old way I ate anymore. Yes, I can't go into my favorite restaurant and eat my favorite dish in its entirety. But you damn well better believe I eat some of it!

I realize now that this is how life is supposed to be. A perfect balance between still enjoying food, but not letting it control you. Being active and social and not being in pain or embarrassed all of the time. Granted I'm only down about 42lbs, but those 42lbs have made a big change in the way I feel physically.

So yes, it may seem crazy in the beginning - but here on the other side you realize just how crazy you were living life before being sleeved. At least for me it's been that way.

[iggychic 1,405]

It's not far fetched to think about your son losing his mom. Mine almost lost his due to this surgery. The risks are real and need to be considered carefully in every case to see if this makes sense. For me, it seemed like it was an easy choice, but I do regret it significantly. The torture I underwent was nothing to what I did to my poor son's little security blanket (that would be me lol).

I was likely a better candidate for the band, but was sold by a slick doc with great advertising (A center of excellence mind you). It should have been a clue to me that when I had my first appt with the doc they were pushing plastics. They are in the "business" of making money and that was their priority. I looked to be an easy case (no comorbidities, low BMI, low risk) and the danged surgery nearly killed me.

I was just having lunch with some girlfriends today and the subject of "crazy" came up. Ya I think for some it's totally nuts to take this step. For others, it's likely very necessary and it is a better option than a bypass (due to malabsorption, etc). What's right for you? I don't know because I don't know your situation, but for me, this was crazy and not very bright. Yes I'm losing weight, but it wasn't worth what I went through.

[MelissaGG 9]

Iggychick, a few people have posted about almost dying but none have shared their story. If you are comfortable doing so, can you please share? As I see it, I am in fora minimum of removal of the band and would like to understand what some comp,citations might be. Was it surgical error or some other factor?

[clk 3,519]

Yes, definitely do your research and seek out the negative stories as well as the positive ones. Too many people make this decision - and it IS a drastic one - without educating themselves on all possibilities. Complications are rare but that's no comfort to you or your loved ones if you wind up in the 1 percent.

I started by researching the band. Being the cautious planner that I am, I did a solid several months of looking into the procedure and honestly, what I found was upsetting. Too many complications, too many repeat surgeries, too many with damage to the stomach and far too many people not losing the weight.

When I saw many were revising to sleeve I started researching it as well. And honestly? The first time I read about the procedure I was horrified and thought it was far too drastic. I did some metabolic testing and saw another nutritionist (sixth or seventh time, I think) and did another dieting attempt. During this period, I kept researching the sleeve, just watching and waiting, without really being sure it was right for me.

At some point (perhaps it was the results of the metabolic testing or the failure and regain I suffered on yet another diet) I decided to more seriously consider the sleeve.

All told, I did a solid year of research on the sleeve and spent several months researching three different doctors before making my decision. I went in knowing what to expect and I feel I had a smooth recovery and adjustment because of that. Well, as smooth as life can be when you find yourself without your usual emotional crutch and unable to indulge in the overeating you enjoyed so much! But it was the right choice for me.

Time and research are all that will tell you if you want this surgery. Being cautious is commendable. Being prepared is imperative. I'm very happy and would do it again in a heartbeat. In fact, I'd love to take my mom and sister to get the surgery done, too! But it's easy for me to say that when I suffered no real complications.

Good luck. Ask questions and read everything you can find here. There are some old threads here that are immensely informative and still relevant today. Search out all of the experiences you can find and make a choice once you're fully educated on the pros and cons of this surgery.

~Cheri

[NurseGrace 509]

I had a band too, and except for VERY early out, I never did well with it. I had it out and swore off weight loss surgery. Well, two years passed and my obesity never left me.

I was scared to do this, but I was scared NOT to do something about my weight problems too. I'm not going to try to sit here and talk you into it or tell you its amazing, because honestly, I am 10 days post op, there is so much I have yet to discover about this surgery but I am a medically literate and I still decided to press forward, knowing what I know.

[iggychic 1,405]

Iggychick' date=' a few people have posted about almost dying but none have shared their story. If you are comfortable doing so, can you please share? As I see it, I am in fora minimum of removal of the band and would like to understand what some comp,citations might be. Was it surgical error or some other factor?[/quote']

Sure Melissa I'll give you the brief version because the original one played out here and was a very very very long thread LOL

I went in for surgery at a COE day surgery center (my first mistake IMO...I think this should be done in a hospital with a minimum one night stay just in case of complications). During the surgery I had extensive bleeding. When they closed me up I had a large mass of blood in my abdomen which they said would absorb naturally. I however lost so much blood that I experienced seizures which lasted over 24 hours (I could see and feel everything going on around me but couldn't communicate at all...it was horrible). I don't know why they didn't send me to a hospital earlier, but finally the next day they did (because they were closing and didn't want to stay over the weekend with me) where I was given two blood transfusions. I stayed there another night and was sent home. While there I asked about a leak test but the doctor didn't feel it was necessary.

I just went downhill from there, getting weaker and weaker by the day, ending up using a walker to get around. I was in and out of ER's with a racing heart, inability to breath well, left shoulder pain and a low grade fever. The doc said it was the blood and wouldn't do a leak test (said it wasn't needed). Finally my lung gave way to the Fluid build up in my plural sac and I was admitted to a local hospital to have my lung drained. 24 hours there and again the docs wanted to send me home but I'd finally had it and put my foot down (while grasping my walker LOL) and told them I was still feeling the same and wasn't going home to die. I insisted on going to a different hospital (Virginia Mason) where they had a VSG specialty dept and a pulmonary team that was highly reviewed. The doctor would not transfer me until we forced her to do an xray only to see that my lung was full again in less than 24 hours. My blood pressure was down to nothing, my heart was racing constantly, I could get in very little oxygen...and my abdomen was full of toxic Fluid. I was a mess, but fortunately my husband's pushing forced them to send me to VM where they had to stabilize the lung issue and my bp before they could even get to the bottom of the problem, the leak. That took a few weeks and then finally they were able to operate again and repair the leak using a new technology called the "Claw" which is used on late leaks due to the tissue damage making them unable to be sutured or stapled back together. The claw has a low success rate because of it's use on badly damaged tissue, but at that point it's the last step before removal of your stomach. I was very fortunate in that it held together for me long enough to stop the leak and heal the tissue.

"Almost died"...why? Well that's different for different leaks. My leak was high up and caused fluid build up in my plural sacs (the bags your lungs are in). This crushes the lungs and you can't breath. It also was effecting my heart. Both issues were severe enough to call a chaplin in to see me a couple of times during my long hospital stay. And a psychologist LOL Because I couldn't stop crying (I was so weak and I was far away from my baby...I'm not a cryer but sheesh I was a waterworks mess!). For others who experience leaks, they might find that their livers shut down, or the kidneys. It just depends on where the toxic fluid is leaking near and how long that goes on. Your body is experiencing toxic shock, sepsis, which shuts down organs one by one until you just can't make it anymore. My lungs were severely damaged and I just couldn't breath and they can only pump out the fluid for so long.

My case, like many you do read, is a mix of physician issues as well as standard risks you sign waivers about. Bleeding, leaking, etc, happen, but the way to ensure that a patient lives is to get proper medical care as soon as possible, including testing for leaks where the symptoms demand it. In my case the doc kept writing it off to the blood, but a simple test would have shown that wasn't the problem.

Dr. Jeffrey Hunter is listed in my profile. He is the doctor who saved my life (along with a HUGE team of wonderful physicians). I only mention this because I want to be clear he is not the physician who did the first surgery.

Your takeaway from this story should be that you don't ask for a test if you have issues, you INSIST! It's a few hundred dollars in comparison to possible death. And that you listen to your body. You know when something is wrong and if your doc isn't taking you seriously, get a second opinion right away, don't wait. When it comes to a leak waiting it out, just means you have more damage every hour you sit back and hope it isn't a leak.

[lessofmeismore 1,405]

Get a Dr. that cares about his patients. One that you feel sees you as someones daughter,sister,mother or wife not a number. Ask your dr straight up is he a better safe than sorry person or a statistic type of person. You want a dr who will value your life as if its his own. Leaks can happen, but if it happens you want the best Dr you can get... You don't want to have to fight for proper medical care and be fighting for your life simultaneously

[iggychic 1,405]

Get a Dr. that cares about his patients. One that you feel sees you as someones daughter' date='sister,mother or wife not a number. Ask your dr straight up is he a better safe than sorry person or a statistic type of person. You want a dr who will value your life as if its his own. Leaks can happen, but if it happens you want the best Dr you can get... You don't want to have to fight for proper medical care and be fighting for your life simultaneously[/quote']

I'd just add that my first doctor was a lovely man. Warm and caring with a great bedside manner...until I needed him at my bedside So just being nice isn't enough unfortunately! Dr. Hunter on the other hand is less warm and fuzzy (he's a nice man, don't get me wrong) but I don't have the personal repot that I had with doc number one.

[lessofmeismore 1,405]

I'd just add that my first doctor was a lovely man. Warm and caring with a great bedside manner...until I needed him at my bedside So just being nice isn't enough unfortunately! Dr. Hunter on the other hand is less warm and fuzzy (he's a nice man' date=' don't get me wrong) but I don't have the personal repot that I had with doc number one.[/quote']

Exactly, no just being nice is not being a great dr by any means... That's why a patient should question him on his approach towards after care and any unforeseen complications.

There are many ways to determine these things... I am not suggesting that only pleasant drs are good after care doctors. I'm saying its best to have the dr tell you his protocol.

Edit: and I'm not suggesting you didn't do these things. This is not a perfect world so even the best layed out plans can unravel.

[Debbie5383 0]

My decision to have the sleeve was extremely difficult! I talked to MANY people and researched. I couldn't even talk about it without whispering so no one would hear. I was afraid of failure and side effects! The biggest thing that helped me was going to the surgeon's surgery "team". I'm talking about the nutritionist, nurse, and support group. (I am also a nurse). I realized that I was tired of my body hurting and becoming less active. I was tired of feeling like a second class citizen and like a failure. I was sleeved in July and so far I have lost 65 to 70 pounds. I feel so incredibly better and younger. I have rediscovered my curves and receive compliments. I had difficulty adjusting the first month after a few minor problems. I got a blood clot in my arm from an infiltrared iv and I had some major nausea! Those all resolved fairly quickly but the mental challenge was the hardest. I had no idea how much of a mental struggle I had with food! The sleeve is a tool. The best one I have ever had! When I am compliant, I lose. When I am not, I don't! Simple! I have no regrets that I stepped out and took this on! I know it has lengthened my life!