Cop-out

[anniew1973 2]

I'm having trouble making my husband understand that I need help with portion controls and I am having trouble dropping weight. He tells me that wanting this surgery is just a 'cop-out' and could do it on my own if I apply myself. Does anyone else have this issue??

[Lander 74]

He's wrong and I'm sorry you don't have better support where you need it most. That said, you'd really better make an effort to learn to weigh and measure portions now because you will be doing that forever after surgery. If we eat to large a portion we have either a lot of pain or vomitting. Neither is nice. Portion Control is part of a bariatric lifestyle.

[No game 14,437]

Ask him to a least go to the doctor consult with you, show him in that appointment how much you weigh and have him listen to the doctor.

My husband didn't want me to do it, but I asked him at least come to my appointment ( he should know better, every time he agrees to at least "see" Something I get my way! Dog, home, jewelry,)

Sometimes I think our spouses are in as much Denial about our weight as we are.

[anniew1973 2]

Thanks ladies I brought him the stuff from the seminar and asked him to look at it. He just said to set it down and he would look at it later. I did the HCG diet and lost 80 lbs, but have gained it back since marrying him. Now he's into cross fit and doesn't realize that we all lose different.

[Lander 74]

That's a good idea. My husband has attended almost everything with me from the seminar right through. Luckily his plant shut down in Dec. when I had the surgery so he even stayed right next to me overnight in the hospital every night I was there. Because he has been there and heard all they have to say, he has been a terrific care giver and has done a lot of the cooking when I don't feel good, and reads the labels in the grocery store when he does the shopping. The more informed your husband is, the more support he'll be.

[abetterme4.2 268]

Lol

My words to my husband: "you want to succeed as my husband, right?"

Him: laughing..."oh yes, more than life itself."

Me: "then support me and don't screw this up. I will take care of my needs and my own portions. But, please, don't sabotage this or be a food-forcer. I want you to succeed as my husband, as well."

True dat.

[Alabamasleever 58]

I have a very un-supportive husband in most all aspects of our life...children, home, job. The one thing I will say is he has never said anything about my weight in any shape, form, or fashion. I honestly think he wouldn't notice if I weighed 1000lbs as long as life carried on for him in the usual fashion. However, in 10 years of marriage he has learned that I don't need his support or approval for anything I decide I want or need. When I first started my 6 month journey waiting to have surgery, he didn't want to talk about it. I wasn't to mention it around him. When I pointed out to him that his own jealousy and insecurity was keeping him from supporting my decision, things changed. Of course, he never admitted that I was right, lol but he did get on board and is now my biggest defender if anyone says anything negative. He still has issues with the thought of me being skinny and getting second looks but I think he's realized that if I didn't do something to KEEP the weight off, he was going to be a single father and that would be way too much for hours easy going lifestyle! IMO, support or not, this is for you and no one else so he can jump on board or get left behind!

[blessings 33]

I'm having trouble making my husband understand that I need help with portion controls and I am having trouble dropping weight. He tells me that wanting this surgery is just a 'cop-out' and could do it on my own if I apply myself. Does anyone else have this issue??

Yes I understand I have the same thing in my home as far as eating, but he had an appt. with his dr. N now he is watching his weight . He is asking me for advice so don't stress.

[anniew1973 2]

Thank you so much for understanding. I am trying one last thing before I go forward with the surgery, just to humor him. We will see how things go