sm8705 41 Posted January 21, 2013 I apologize in advance if this sounds annoying, but I just feel like I have to vent.. It was my bday yesterday, and I don't have anyone to make me feel special on it(husband, bf, kids) my own family basically ignored me, I got a few bday texts from them, but to them showing that they care would be eating out and over eating with cake... I have gone out once since surgery with them, my surgery was on 12/10 btw, I ordered from a kid's menu and they saw how incredibly fast I got full, maybe they think I'd be a waste of their money to go out to eat with me, and I can no longer have alcohol, that was another thing.. It's been a very depressing bday bc I don't feel loved or wanted by them, no one else offered to see me or take me out somewhere, I cried a lot. They don't realize that there's other things that I like to do that would be fun( movies, bowling) food doesn't always mean a good time. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
pinkie 13 Posted January 21, 2013 Happy belated diva. Sometimes when you make a change god doesn't allow everyone to come with is. I know that's you family but remember you did this for you and who understands that will be there. If you lose people along the way then god making room for people that are to be in your life. I understand completely . But stop be thankful pray and move on with what you have been bless with . Which is new beginnings diva . I hope this helps a little . I'm here if you need to vent again .???????????????????????????????????????????????????????? Sent from my iPhone using VST Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Richard Foor 655 Posted January 21, 2013 First off Happy Birthday. Unfortunately the life style change that comes from this surgery is very hard for people who haven't had it to understand. I find sometimes people just aren't sure how to act around me since the surgery and as such some of them just back off because they are afraid they will make things harder. Until your family gets used to your new lifestyle you may need to ask them to do things and not wait for them to ask you. Hope you feel better, Good Luck. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
superstartover 101 Posted January 21, 2013 Happy birthday I am so sorry...I think the next one is gonna b so much better make ur self a large birthday cake flavored Protein Drink and think about the next bday you can go get a new outfit or treat yourself! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Losing weight 126 Posted January 21, 2013 I apologize in advance if this sounds annoying' date=' but I just feel like I have to vent.. It was my bday yesterday, and I don't have anyone to make me feel special on it(husband, bf, kids) my own family basically ignored me, I got a few bday texts from them, but to them showing that they care would be eating out and over eating with cake... I have gone out once since surgery with them, my surgery was on 12/10 btw, I ordered from a kid's menu and they saw how incredibly fast I got full, maybe they think I'd be a waste of their money to go out to eat with me, and I can no longer have alcohol, that was another thing.. It's been a very depressing bday bc I don't feel loved or wanted by them, no one else offered to see me or take me out somewhere, I cried a lot. They don't realize that there's other things that I like to do that would be fun( movies, bowling) food doesn't always mean a good time.[/quote'] Happy Birthday I am so sorry to hear what you are going thru things will get better be strong Sent from my iPhone using VST Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
iegal 460 Posted January 21, 2013 Happy Birthday! You gave yourself a better present than anyone one else could ever give you. It will taste better than any store bought stale cake. You gave yourself a chance to change. Celebrate yourself, your courage, know that you do matter. This will be a year of new firsts, be willing to adapt even if others don't see the new butterfly. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
*Dean* 1,594 Posted January 21, 2013 Happy Birthday. I'm sorry it didn't go so well. Imagine how you're going to look and feel next year! Sounds like your family are a bit challenged by the change in you. Like you said maybe they're struggling to know how to Celebrate without it being centred around food. I don't mind eating out. I'm about 11 weeks post op. I just order something small, usually fish or some other seafood. I don't view what I don't eat as waste because I'm not going to miss out on socialising because I can't eat like a pig anymore! The other thing, like you said, doing something not isn't food centric. Like the movies. You might have to take the lead and organise it though, if it isn't something they'd come up with by themselves. Good luck. I'm sure this year will be a great one for you. Deano Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
sandygo 30 Posted January 21, 2013 Happy birthday!!! Keep you head up girl friend your whole life is about to change!! Soon you'll be abl Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
atelux17 135 Posted January 21, 2013 HAPPY BIRTHDAY, Birthday Buddy!!! we're in the same boat. i turned 30 (unceremoniously) on 1/20/13. But I was happy for the first time on my bday even tho I have no man, nobody at home & the big 3-0 that I've been dreading for we'll over a decade. I had to work all wknd despite requesting it off in August( I was thinking of taking a xanax& spending it on the beach). But even though my BFF is cussing me out of jealousy& I didn't get presents or a cake, I did lose 52lbs in total. I'm healthy after a major operation. Maybe your family didn't want to tempt u with food? Some things go unspoken. But u did get texts& that's sending u some love. Find your happiness within. You already took a great step forward. Congrats!!!!!!!!! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
queenp160 4 Posted January 21, 2013 I apologize in advance if this sounds annoying' date=' but I just feel like I have to vent.. It was my bday yesterday, and I don't have anyone to make me feel special on it(husband, bf, kids) my own family basically ignored me, I got a few bday texts from them, but to them showing that they care would be eating out and over eating with cake... I have gone out once since surgery with them, my surgery was on 12/10 btw, I ordered from a kid's menu and they saw how incredibly fast I got full, maybe they think I'd be a waste of their money to go out to eat with me, and I can no longer have alcohol, that was another thing.. It's been a very depressing bday bc I don't feel loved or wanted by them, no one else offered to see me or take me out somewhere, I cried a lot. They don't realize that there's other things that I like to do that would be fun( movies, bowling) food doesn't always mean a good time.[/quote'] Happy belated birthday! I'm sorry that you felt ignored by your family. They may not know how to Celebrate with the new you. Maybe over the next year you can show them that you can do activities that are not centered around food and still have fun. By your next birthday they might get it. If not, please accept that you can do something without them. Take your self somewhere, a trip, a spa. Do something nice for you. Take care of yourself. We will be here to support you. Patrice Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
sm8705 41 Posted January 27, 2013 Thanks everybody for all your kind words, I know I'm kind of late to respond sorry! I'm trying to put all the sadness behind me and just move forward. On a more positive note, the scale said I'm in the 100's today and I have never seen it say 100 something before ever! I have now lost 32lbs since surgery and I'm 6 weeks out :-) Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Keepgoing247 116 Posted January 27, 2013 ????Happy Birthday!!???? I'm sorry your day was extra difficult. I hope, with some time, they will come around. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Mastiff_mama 171 Posted January 27, 2013 I can sooo relate! I was 50 on the 21st and stayed home all day and didn't see. A soul ...my mama called that morning, but I text my friend the night before and asked I'd they wanted to eat the next day, my birthday. I didn't mention it was my BD, but she knows the date ....didn't answer my text until 6pm the night of my birthday to tell me she didn't feel well. I threw myself a party ...a pity party! Lol I got over it! Eventually! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
atelux17 135 Posted January 31, 2013 Well at least u had a mastiff to keep u company. I'd love to have a dog. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites