Apathy? Denial? WHAT?

[Obsidian 26]

I came to VST in July to relay my story and see if anyone else had a similar story as mine and the same fears as me. Of course I found out that in fact we are all alike in our fears and yes there are plenty of people out there like me (at least when it comes to this surgery, ahem..). I didn't stick around, yeah... I know... bad me. I think at the time I was still in denial about whether or not I would even allow myself to go through this surgery.

Well.. I kept on it and now I'm not too far out from the surgery. Surgery has been scheduled for February 4th! (two days after my birthday btw)

As the time is coming closer I find myself feeling two things... firstly, anxiety! I expect this emotion. Frankly I have anxiety disorder and at this point in time anxiety is completely normal for someone WITHOUT anxiety disorder. So for someone with anxiety disorder, forgetaboutit!

I also have this swings into what I have trouble describing. It's kind of a numbness or the refusal to acknowledge what is about to happen. I am wondering if anyone else has experienced this? It's kind of like.. you feel NOTHING at all about the surgery. I guess it's as if the surgery just IS. Almost like you're in a dream except you know you're not dreaming. I dunno if that makes sense...

It's definitely an odd feeling, but one I've felt a lot more as the process went on and each stage was finished. It's almost like I'm apathetic one moment, and the next I'm anxious and my heart is beating hard. What a roller coaster!

[AngelaBreeden 7]

I too have anxiety disorder and experienced tons of that before surgery and still 2 weeks after surgery. It's just part of my life. Before surgery I had a hard time believing it was really gonna happen. It didn't truly sink in till I woke up after. Now I have anxiety around believing I'm truly going to loose any weight. I guess being in a stall after loosing 9 pounds in the first week doesn't help with that but what had helped for me is reading people's stories on here and seeing this is all pretty normal. I wish you the best for your upcoming surgery

[12345 80]

I, too, was anxious before the surgery. My doctor prescribed Xanax to take the morning of the surgery. That helped a lot.

[AdeptDreamer 104]

Hi, I'm scheduled for surgery on Feb. 4th too

I am nervous/scared/happy/excited/angry/sad/content/blah but the craziest emotion I felt was the "bring it on, sleeve!"

We will be fine, no matter what Good Luck to you!

Oh and when do you start your pre- op diet? I start this Sunday!

[Obsidian 26]

Thanks all for the kind words of encouragement!

Xanax! I have that prescribed for my anxiety, I will have to ask my surgeon if it is ok to take the morning of the surgery to keep me calm. I worry about taking a sedative like that along with the anesthesia they will be using. But then again I worry about everything. Although I think my nervousness may override any Xanax! LOL

Hiya AdeptDreamer! Yay for Feb 4th! I start the pre-op diet on Sunday as well (technically I think the lady told me to start it on the 21st on the paperwork but close enough). I am sort of starting now though because I am so close to the 400lb limit for the surgery I definitely want to stay under that when I see them on Monday. I have a BUNCH of pre-op appointments on Monday. Starting at like 8AM and going till NOON! I will be seeing everyone basically.. financial, nutritionist, psychologist, surgeon.. etc. Then they want to see me again on the 29th. Then finally the big day.

Honestly right this moment I'm excited to have it done finally and I KNOW that I can succeed with the help of my surgery. I'm also very nervous.. butterflies in the stomach kind of nervous. It's just those weird moments where I feel almost like.. nothing at all.. that is kind of unnerving. I'm not having any second thoughts tho, that is good. Just sort of a quiet acceptance that this HAS to be done. I've tried everything else over the last decade. Plus, I have horrible arthritis in my knees that I have to take narcotics for (I don't like how they make me feel), so I basically started telling myself that I should consider this a necessary surgery for my knees. I will likely have to have knee replacement one day, but for now this is my first "knee surgery"... so to speak.

[lose2win 32]

Guys today is my first week post op anniversary I went thru all those emotions couldn't sleep the night before once they gave me Anastasia its was game over I woke up and I was sleeved I lost 25 lbs in a week this is the best decision of your life.

Sent from my iPhone 5 using VST