Is this normal?????

[nightingale2u 42]

I am soooooooooooooo emotional ... crying at the drop of the hat... is this part of the post-op course or am I just going over the edge????

Yesterday when I went in for my post-op check... the Dr. was wonderful and so helpful and yet as usual the staff rarely looked at me when speaking to me... never once used a friendly or caring voice when speaking at all ... in fact... the one gal worked on her computer and never looked up at me one or even bothered to tell me she was finished with me. I finally said...do you need anything else??? She looked up at me like I was retarded and said... "uh.. no"... which actully came out in a *DUH* tone. She never returned my script and I forgot about it... I get home to a message saying it will be at the front desk (UMMMMM... I live FAR & AWAY... I'll be right down to pick that up. )

All I can think of is... It makes me literally sick to my stomach to call their office with any problems... so I never do... it makes me feel even worse to drive the 1 hour and 45 minutes to be seen there. I love my surgeon but in my opinion his office staff (reception and nursing) completely lack people skills and certainly are not well trained in customer service. So... I'll just sit here and blubber some more and have another pity party and hope that this emotional crap passes soon!

It's wonderful to have a place to vent... just needed an ear or two...

Bummed Darcy

[nightingale2u 42]

:think

[GeezerSue 7]

First, you are likely still working the anesthesia out of your system. I remember that for her breast reduction surgery, our daughter's third week post-op was her very worst. For no specific reason. Allow yourself to be unreasonably emotional for as long as you need.

Then, when it's over, if you feel the same way...get the doctor alone and tell him that you WISH it were as easy to talk to his staff as it is to talk to him. That you never mentioned it before, but now that others are asking what doctor you went to... Maybe you could even mention that a friend called and was so turned off that she decided to go elsewhere (even if you have to convince a friend to call.)

[New Hope 37]

Darcy, I agree with Sue. I felt yucky for the first couple of weeks -- not really bad, but just blah. I also started realizing how much food had played a part in my life. I didn't realize how much my life rotated around "What am I going to eat?" Where are we going to eat dinner tonight?" Once you give yourself the necessary time to heal and can start walking, bike riding, etc., that really helps.

Do you have a fax machine at home? I've found that invaluable for sending and receiving various dr. reports, referrals, bloodwork, etc. I got the name of my dr.'s office manager and email address. If I have a ?, I send her an email. She responds quickly.

Take care of yourself and give yourself time to heal! If you have a crying jag, it's o.k. (Just drink plenty of Water so you don't get dehydrated --- just teasing!) Love your new picture!

[donali 57]

Darcy - what everyone else says is sooooo true! Anesthesia and crying often go hand-in-hand. I was all weepy on Saturday, but couldn't even cry 'cause it hurt to bad... lol

Sue's advice is right on - once the anesthesia is out of your system, and you're feeling more like yourself, get that doctor off to the side... Even if you have to make up a fictitious friend who was turned off by the office staff.

Hey, you know what? YOU'RE BANDED!!!! Whoo hooo!!! :D

[nightingale2u 42]

Sue, Marie and Donali... thanks so much! I'm not generally this whacked...lol. I have an appointment in 5 weeks for another post-op check and a possible fill... I'll wait until then prior to saying anything. My surgeon has a private practice and it doesn't appear that any specific person is in charge... other than the surgeon of course. It's been this way from the beginning... I think It's just harder to handle right now. Maybe this is the way people are in a bigger city???? It was really important to me to make patients feel good... laugh... smile and know that I cared. This line of behavior has really thrown me for a loop from the start.

Donali... you have an incredible gift for putting things in perspective! You are right... I have waited for this... worked for this... and dang it... I'm here at last!

((((hugs to Y'all)))

Darcy

[nightingale2u 42]

Ohhh... and Marie... thanks for the compliment on my new pic! That was actually taken a year ago at my wedding... so not terribly recent but at least I have make-up and a smile on!

I guess I better go puree something... hopefull the kitty isn't on the counter again.

[hagerteresa 3]

Hi Darcy,

Glad you were sounding more chipper by the end of your post. Yes the puree period does suck and surely can cause mood swings. I remember being really frustrated about that time. I am sure healing could cause it too. Weight loss is notorious for causing mood swings too. I have gone in to weigh, lost several pounds and was thrilled beyond belief and 10 minutes later something could have me nearly sobbing driving home. It will all work out.

You are a CUSTOMER when you enter their office and they should treat you like one. It is people like you that allow them to take home a check. DEMAND attention. Don't let them get away with crappy eye contact and ho-hum answers. I would have been pissed if they had forgotten to give me something back and I would have made them overnight it to me. I hate bad customer service and the only way things change is with people willing to ripple the Water and demand change. Don't be a wuss. I would have said, "Excuse me." very firmily but politely. Do not tolerate their attitude. This should apply in every facet of customer service.

When I was a kid, things would come up that I really wanted my mom to help me deal with (bad teachers, unfair grades, this that or the other) and my mom would never help me. She told me that I will have to deal with problems as an adult and I had better learn how. I hated it when I was a kid but now find dealing with lame people kind of fun and entertaining. Keep your chin up and best of luck to you, Teresa

[shellyj 5]

when i had my surgery and i woke up they asked me how i felt i said 'i feel like crying' they said it was the anesthesia and it affects most peoples emotions. i started my period the day of surgery so between the anesthesia and the PMS i was an emotional trainwreck!!!

i would call the dr's office and ask to speak to the office manager and let them know how unfriendly there office is. i worked at a dr's office for about a year and if you were rude ONCE to a patient you were fired, hence we all had a great attitude towards patients!

[La_madam 20]

Darcy..I experienced the crying also but I do not think it was from the anasthesia..my therapist and I came to the conclusion it was becasue I had given up food. I no longer could eat for comfort or emotional reasons. My emotions ever since have been so strange. I cry much easier since being banded. Now I have to deal with my emitions insted of turning to food..just my story though. It does get better.

[nightingale2u 42]

Thanks Teresa... Shelly and Michelle!

Again... it's a HUGE relief to find out that I am not losing my mind! I'm sure the anesthesia is part of it but also think you are right on the money in regards to the food issues Michelle. I think instead of dealing with emotions... I ate... and now... well... I just have to deal with them. I think it's a good thing all and everyone should buy stock in facial tissue because the demand for it is definitely increasing around these parts!

Teresa.. I actually did speak up when I was first treated this way by the office and think that may be why things have worsened. I know that another patient posted that I should not say anything because the process for getting surgery would take longer if I did. I thought... holy crap... that's blackmail. I will copy the letter that they send out to patients once they submit paperwork to the insurance company... it's has the very same tone. I have worked in healthcare for years and have literally NEVER encountered this. I have talked to others that have encountered this problem as well but perhaps my skin is just a little thinner than most???

There is a support group meeting the beginning of August and I will be bringing my concerns along. My blood pressure is ALWAYS normal with one exception... it is sky high evertime I enter that office. I think my next tactic will be to kill them with kindness and be OVERLY friendly and perhaps even a bit of a pain in the buttocks... we'll see!

THANK YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Janie Jackson 0]

Darcy, I love your picture too. The first few weeks were terrible but my friends on this board said it would get better in a few weeks and it did. The 2nd week I almost asked the nurse how soon It would be before I could get the band taken out.It is still hard ( I was banded on 5-6-04 ) but I have lost 29lbs and that part is great. I still struggle with depression over it but it gets better daily. I think it will take time to completely get over the mourning of the death of the free bad eater that I was. But I have high hopes. Hang in there...Janie

[Penni60 45]

Darcy: I too had the emotional aspect of the post op phase. IT does get better. Just wait till you get to exercising and release all those natural endorphins and then go see those crappy, rude, obnoxious, mean, crude, stuck up, no personality, people in his office. LOL!! I know I went out to eat sushi one night after doing an exceptionally long workout that morning and I guess the endorphins finally kicked in. The waitress was taking her sweet time in getting out drink order. I waved my hand in the air and said really LOUD, "EXCUSE ME, YEAH WE ARE THIRST AND HUNGRY OVER HERE." My bf was shocked. I must admit I was too. But MAN did it feel good.

Don't take that crap off the office staff. And please don't give them anymore power over you like that. YOU did nothing wrong.

Love ya