Got sleeved 12/17, Husband deployed.

[FAWife 65]

Hi Y'all,

I was sleeved on 12/17 literally 3days before my husband was deployed. We have three children and I have been left to fend for myself. Everyone tells me I am loosing weight, but to be honest with y'all I am deadly mortified that I don't. You see my weight issues have been there my entires life. My grandmother put me on a diet when I was 4 yrs old and since then it's been a downward spiral.

My husband has been very supportive (as much as he can). Everyday I wake up stressing that I am not loosing weight. I find myself staring at myself in the mirror looking at my body trying to see one bit of change. I finally saw that many of you share openly and decided to participate in conversation instead of just sitting back.

I look forward to hearing from y'all.

[BrokeMyHalo 107]

I say this in the nicest way possible, get some therapy!

It'll help you! And more importantly your long term success with weight loss.

Hang in there... The weight WILL come off but to keep it off get some mental help. I wish I had done that but now I'm starting all over again.

Btw I admire your husband for his service!

[Joy0125 95]

I have a lot of weight perception issues from when I was young too. I look back at pics of myself when my mom told me I was putting on weight and I would kill to look like that now. I was a nice healthy weight. My mom was skin and bones so she couldn't compare. This is our time to focus on us and build our body image in a healthy way. You will lose weight, in a healthy, controlled manner that is life changing. We need to follow doctor's orders but it will happen. I was sleeved on the 18th so we are close to each other. Stay positive, stay focused!! I also want to thank you and your husband for your service and sacrifice for our freedom

[AngelEyesInNJ 187]

It takes time to see the difference. If the scale doesn't move more then likely your losing the inches. I noticed after a while my clothes started fitting differently although I still see the big girl when I look in the mirror I have been with her for over 20 yrs so it is a work in progress to get my head around the fact that I am no longer Her but a more healthier me.

One thing to remember is the weight didn't come on over night nor will it go away that way. Just stick to your doctors instructions and you will do fine, just take baby steps.. one day at a time is the best way

[FAWife 65]

Thank you. I really didn't take any offense from it. I have been working with my therapist. Before surgery I was never like that. I guess since I've had the surgery I feel that people will look at me differently. I just can't wait to start working out.

[Decembersleever 154]

Everyone is different as to how we lose the weight. I was obsessing over the scale so I decided to stay off it. You have your hands full so try to concentrate on getting your Protein and Water in

This forum is a great support system and we are all here for you. Take it a meal at a time.

[FAWife 65]

I haven't even weighed myself. I don't want to until my doctors appointment. Thank you all for your kind words. This gives me more of a reassurance that I've done something wonderful for my health.

[smt216 29]

I agree with Decembersleever; you have your hands full! We've all looked at ourselves (pre-op) for our entire lives; it's going to take some time to get used to seeing LESS of us in the mirror. People tell me my face looks "so much thinner" and I still see the same ol me when I look in the mirrior. I think we put a lot of pressure on ourselves to look a certain way in a certain time. I'll bet you have lost tons of inches! And what do you mean you can't wait to start working out? I'll bet those kids have you hopping! You are doing great! Keep us updated!

As a military brat; my hat is off to your husband and all those men and women keeping us safe!

[TheCurvyJones 721]

I feel like surgery puts us at our most vulnerable. You know how folks say that weight gain is an outward representation of an inner issue... the surgery goes RIGHT TO THE CORE of that issue and forces us to work on it. I feel way more exposed right now than I did before surgery. Losing my safe cocoon of fat where I became invisible is almost terrifying to me.

How long is your husband deployed? He might not recognize you when he comes back.

[FAWife 65]

Yeah he'll be gone for nine months that gives it a bit of excitement knowing I might look completely different. :0)

[Sadlers1999 169]

Hi Y'all' date='

I was sleeved on 12/17 literally 3days before my husband was deployed. We have three children and I have been left to fend for myself. Everyone tells me I am loosing weight, but to be honest with y'all I am deadly mortified that I don't. You see my weight issues have been there my entires life. My grandmother put me on a diet when I was 4 yrs old and since then it's been a downward spiral.

My husband has been very supportive (as much as he can). Everyday I wake up stressing that I am not loosing weight. I find myself staring at myself in the mirror looking at my body trying to see one bit of change. I finally saw that many of you share openly and decided to participate in conversation instead of just sitting back.

I look forward to hearing from y'all.[/quote']

I was sleeved on the same day. And, like many people on this site, I have had a life-long battle with my weight. I grew up on a vegetable farm (tomatoes, zucchini, corn, etc) and I was not raised on processed foods, but I was always overweight even though I had two skinny sisters and we all ate the same things. So, I understand your frustration and fear.

I have four children and the youngest are 2 and 4. Both these children weigh between 25 and 35 lbs. I was told not to lift more than 10 lbs the first two weeks and no more than 20 lbs until the end of January. It is one thing to be "on your own" with three older children, but I was wondering if your children are younger, like mine, how are you dealing with NOT lifting?

[FAWife 65]

Well my kids are 4yrs, 17months, and 7months so the whole not lifting can't happen with us. I have to do what I have to do. ;0)

[Sadlers1999 169]

Well my kids are 4yrs' date=' 17months, and 7months so the whole not lifting can't happen with us. I have to do what I have to do. ;0)[/quote']

I am really sorry you are in this situation, but in my ignorance, do you have a church community or neighbors who can help during the day? Or, since your children are NOT school age, could you drive to where you have family and stay there until the end of January? I am concerned because you don't want to rip something and cause a leak and/or hernia. If you get a leak, you will not be able to take care of your kids on any level.

I can' imagine having a 7 month old. They really need to be lifted. Can your 4-year old help you pick up the baby?

[Ballermom 803]

Welcome here is a place of support!

I agree it take time to see the difference you may be loosing inches. Which is good too. Follow your physicians orders and the weight will fall off. You will do fine.

My fitness Pal is another site for support I'm (so sleeve) you can friend me when you join, you can look up a thread here or My Fitness Pal.

Your husband is supportive and that absolutely wonderful.

I thank him for his service.

Congrats on your surgery!

Good luck!

[meeganlee 33]

I was also sleeved on 12/17. I really hope you can do your best to ask for help. Do you have friends with kids? I'm sure everyone would be up for doing extra play dates with your 4 year old. That is the one you should be careful of lifting. Cuddling is a good substitute for picking them up at that age. If you have people around who can give you extra help, I'm sure they would really like to. If you aren't comfortable telling people about your surgery, maybe you could say you had abdominal surgery, and not be specific. In the community where I live there have been many things that have happened over time (a mother with surgery, a boy with leukemia, etc) and it always makes the community feel better when they can be of help. I think many of us feel like we chose the surgery, so we shouldn't ask for help, but I think that is a mistake. We all had major surgery, and especially if your husband is serving, you need and deserve support. I don't know what your situation is, but I'm just wondering if you have actually asked anyone in your community if they can help out. I had a friend ask what I needed, and the first week, I asked her to be my shopping buddy. We had a great time shopping together, and she lifted the bags into and out of the car when I got home. I'll be there are people who could help you with those kinds of things, and that they would love to help. Please reach out. Trying to do it all alone is a recipe for a difficult recovery. Take good care.