Scared of failure...

[UTGal99 327]

I was sleeved on Oct 3 - down 36 pounds thus far and feeling great about it! My husband got sleeved on 12/19/12. He is doing great, healing nicely and we are on this journey together. Now, here is where the problem lies...

Growing up with two brothers I have always been so competitiive. food was always a competition for me. If my brother had 2 hamburgers, I had to eat another hamburger (not b/c I wanted it but I always felt like I couldn't be outdone!) Hence my weight gain in adult life.

Part of my success in losing weight thus far with the sleeve was that I was limited in what I could eat (liquids, purees, mushies, etc.) to prevent medical issues. Now that I am able to eat anything I am concerned that I will sabotage my own efforts b/c hubby is losing weight more quickly than I. I don't want to feel like a failure, but let's be quite frank...men can lose weight without even trying...us ladies have a hell of a time getting 1 pound off.

Any suggestions on how I can stay motivated and losing when hubby is lapping me with his weight loss?

I am happy for he and I to be on this journey together and he is VERY supportive of all my efforts and success thus far. I am more concerned about myself (my own worst enemy...)

Any thoughts....

[asherje 81]

I know that's tough, it always sucks to diet with a man, the support is great but ever so frustrating since they seem to lose like 5xs faster lol.

Benefit of losing more slowly is you can workout and try to keep the skin from getting as saggy. I know not the most motivating statements but thought I'd try to help.

[NancyDec20 212]

I can understand where you are coming from.. I had surgery on dec20 and my husband will have his dec 27th.. and from what Im told.. Men seem to lose weight faster than women do..I too was worried that he is going to do so much better than me. He is a great supporter for me and I for him.. dont know what I would of done without him by my side this whole time.. I too have 4 brothers. But I think Im not going to think of this as a competition. im going to do whats right for me.. and if it takes me a little more time then him.. thats ok.. the key to it is to follow what the doc says and things should be ok. I am planning on working out so I dont get the saggy skin.. that scares me the most I think LOL. Be well.

[Nicolanz 1,484]

Well two good things: you're already aware men lose faster and with the sleeve, you can forget about out eating anyone!

Be happy with your progress and for your husband's. He may get there faster but know you WILL get there. It's not a competition. He's still going to have the same struggles as you. Work together! It will probably bring you closer. What a blessing it is to have someone going through this with you!

[gloriann 43]

I disagree. My husband and I still go out to dinner. Of course, it's not as often and we watch the calorie intake. Of course, Protein first! Though I have had the VSG, he is losing weight by following my program. We excercise together, and encourage one another on our journey. Good luck!

[Alamoloser 70]

Don't think of it as a race (I know, harder said than done) but your fortunate to have somebody by your side going thru this with you. Look at the benefits of your journey together rather than a competition. I think a lot of us would like for our better halves to understand what we feel like somedays and not have to explain why we aren't hungry.