Bawse52 68 Posted November 13, 2012 I am currently dating someone that I met a month after I had the surgery...she is really nice...real sweet. Buuuut I am not use to all this attention I am now getting...it feels soo good, I dont want to be in a commited relationship. I want to get out in enjoy the new me!! I never thought that I would feel this way before the surgery , I dont want to hurt the person I am with now... has anybody else been in this postion before and how did you handle it? 2 Weight-less Beauty and Fiddleman reacted to this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Sharon's last chance 88 Posted November 13, 2012 I think honesty is the only way to go. As long as she knows that you want to date others, she can make her own decision regarding whether she wants to continue seeing you. Just be sure you are not tossing aside the prize catch just to chase after a bunch of bait fish. LOL. 8 Bawse52, HELLO ITS ME CAMI, nanaspez and 5 others reacted to this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Bawse52 68 Posted November 13, 2012 Sharon u said something then baby!! I dont have time for no catfish!!!!!!!!!!! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
HELLO ITS ME CAMI 27 Posted November 13, 2012 The grass always looks greener on the other side. If your happy with the one your with, see were it leads. No rush take your time. 4 xavtay2, TwinsMama, jewels1227 and 1 other reacted to this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
jewels1227 20 Posted November 13, 2012 I would personally take things slow. Let her know what you desire UP FRONT. But the flip side is that you can't be mad if she finds someone else either. :-) Just a chance you got to take. Make sure you are making the right decision, and stick by it! Good luck! 1 TwinsMama reacted to this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
favoredone 590 Posted November 13, 2012 What about asking for a little break...There's nothing wrong with wanting to be single for a while.. Just don't be trifling, sneaky and lying about it... If you are meant to be together, no matter how much attention you get, weight you lose or other women you meet, NONE of it will compare to have her in your life... NONE of it... Just be honest and tell her why.. She may be a little hurt, but I think she will see your point... Good luck!! 1 Bawse52 reacted to this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
PerfectlyImperfect 49 Posted November 13, 2012 I am currently dating someone that I met a month after I had the surgery...she is really nice...real sweet. Buuuut I am not use to all this attention I am now getting...it feels soo good' date=' I dont want to be in a commited relationship. I want to get out in enjoy the new me!! I never thought that I would feel this way before the surgery , I dont want to hurt the person I am with now... has anybody else been in this postion before and how did you handle it?[/quote'] Be honest with her and tell her what you said here. You didn't know you'd find yourself wanting to explore the new slimmer you and all it brings to the table. She may stick around or she may jump ship. My bf and I just broke up. I have had some offers but have no intentions on being in a serious relationship until I have lived the life I'm going to have with weight loss. Good luck 2 TwinsMama and Bawse52 reacted to this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
TwinsMama 483 Posted November 13, 2012 Absolutely normal to feel this way. Thus the many spouses who don't want their husbands/wives to have this surgery. It is especially hard if you've never been thin before. Be honest but not cruel. What you don't say...now that I've got my sexy back, I want options including those that may look better than you. What you do say...you are not ready to be in a committed relationship (if that's the truth) but that you wouldn't mind still seeing her (also if the truth). Do not, continue to be the same, saying you want something different. This is only going to confuse her and cause drama down the line. Give her the opportunity to make a choice to be with or without you. She may be fending off offers too. Now I do have to say, give real thought to what Cami said above. If she was willing and even found you attractive before the weight loss, you know she is really into you. I've seen this happen with myself and a few friends, we lost the weight everyone wanted us, then over time, we realized it was mostly about how we looked and not who we were. Waste of time and relationships. Take your time and enjoy your new life. Be honest and things will work themselves out one way or another. 1 Bawse52 reacted to this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Fiddleman 4,376 Posted November 13, 2012 I am currently dating someone that I met a month after I had the surgery...she is really nice...real sweet. Buuuut I am not use to all this attention I am now getting...it feels soo good' date=' I dont want to be in a commited relationship. I want to get out in enjoy the new me!! I never thought that I would feel this way before the surgery , I dont want to hurt the person I am with now... has anybody else been in this postion before and how did you handle it?[/quote'] Yes, I know what you mean. Getting flirts left and right out there going to the movies, shopping in the mall, walking on the trails, etc. I am happily married and mostly find this all amusing. Not getting noticed was one of my biggest pet peeves in my adult life and mostly find this amusing. It sure lifts my confidence as a man. 2 Bawse52 and TwinsMama reacted to this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites