My Terrible Day

[Bel12 13]

She didn't say my bmi was too high for the Sleeve she said it was too high for the band. She said I can't get the sleeve because I don't have enough time to devote to it with being in school and working full time.

[Fun size 62]

Today was a rough day an my eyes burn from crying for hours. 7 months ago my primary doctor suggested I check out Lapband surgery. I never thought it before because I thought it was a cop out but at 300 lbs, back pain, knee pain and a sad future looking forward gaining weight

when I choose to have children.

I decided to start on the path of Lapband and within a week I met with the surgeon, physical therapy, therapist and nutritionist. Everyone said I'm a great candidate for Lapband and just had a few changes to make I.e work out more. So I changed my diet and tried to work out more but working full time and going to nursing school made it all very difficult. Throughout the months I met with the dietitian and she said I was on track and said I needed one more appt with the higher up people and there shouldn't be a problem thinking I would have surgery during Xmas break. I met with these higher people and they proceeded to tell me I am no longer qualified for the Lapband because my bmi was 1.5 points over the max. No one ever told

me there was a max so I was very disappointed. They told me I would be better fit for the sleeve and I should start looking into that. So they made a follow up with the dietitian and another with a dietitian for sleeve diet education. I had an appt with my primary doc who put me on an appetite suppressant which worked great. I lost 14 lbs in 2 weeks. Today I had my follow up with the dietitian which went great for the first half. Then she attacked. She went on and on about how I don't have time for this surgery and because of my work and school schedule there doesn't seem to be much time to make sure I eat right and get to the gym. She said I need to reevaluate life and make myself first. She said maybe after school would be better. I informed her that is two years away. So after 7 months and thousands of dollars later and dozens of appointments she was telling me to give up. I told her I wanted to have the surgery now because I want kids after school and she let me know that I can't have kids until 2 years after the sleeve so I would be well into my 30s before that happened. She said I seems to be doing everything right I just don't have the time. She told me no doc would preform the surgery with a bmi over 45 but no one ever told me that because my bmi hasn't been under 45 in years. She said she was sorry that they lied to me and lead me to believe all of this. I balled right there in her office for 30 mins and I walked out. So here I am still fat, feeling like a failure and no weight loss in sight..... It's been a very bad day.

Lots of people have this with BMI's in 50's and higher, She was wrong on multiple levels. Get a new doc, Some people shouldn't practice medicine.

[scaredoftheunknown 95]

Did I read this right? Was this the dietitian telling you all this?

[abetterme4.2 268]

How did she not know your BMI to begin? Because she's an idiot.

The first thing they do at ANY bariatric surgeons office....insurance then BMI. sometimes money is before BMI. but they certainly know what it is prior to you going in there for the consultation so the surgeon doesn't invest his time on someone. After your consultation, most patients do not see their surgeon again until surgery.

I would find a different nutritionist because NUT seems to fit this one. She may be qualified, but she is definitely derelict in her performance.

It is definitely a blessing in disguise. I wouldn't want her on my "case" if I were a patient there. Either way, a 2nd opinion wouldn't hurt and getting on the right track to finding the time needed to get what you need and deserve.

[Oregondaisy 2,021]

It doesn't take time to devote to having a sleeve. It takes eating right after surgery. There are plenty of people who walk for exercise and how you get your exercise is none of her business anyway.

Why is this person calling all the shots, anyway? There has to be a way to make an appointment with the surgeon's office. She is not the person with the final say in this matter. Most ins. want a psych eval anyway. Is she trying to do their job?

[jbart0973 19]

Your NUT is definitely a NUT! Do not let her opinion deter you. You can do this! If you really want this you can make it happen. As far as her telling you that you don't have time, that's rediculous! If you have a busy schedule then you make adjustments...prepare food ahead of time so you always have something healthy on hand if you are on the go a lot. It's about managing the little time you do have to make it work for you. It's about committing to a new lifestyle. Go see your surgeon an talk to him about what the NUT said and reaffirm your commitment to wanting to do this.

[Bel12 13]

The way my surgeon works is with a team so this dietitian is part of that team so I can't just go find a new one. And this was the 3rd dietitian in this team I have seen. The first one I have been working with for 6 months then she passed me off to like her supervisor which was this one I meet with yesterday. I was suppose to meet with the 1st one nov 9 but this dietitian said they were going to cancel that appt and talk about me at the next team meeting and see what the team wants to do with me.

[lizv123 389]

Second opinion time! I have a BMI of 48 and that qualifies me for everything but the DS, and the BMI has to be 50 for that.

Insane that they won't sleeve you. I'd go for that anyway, so many complaints about the band. But get a second opinion or talk to someone else on the team. The dietician stepped over the line. It's not her job to make these decisions for you. Her concern is food and Vitamins. Period.

[irish1988 46]

I just can't believe she told you what you do and don't have time for. That is none of her business.. You should try to speak to someone else in that office.. I mean, there has got to be somebody else to talk too.... I would have told her off.

[KatieOkieDokie 171]

The NUT lied to you plain and simple there are several (probably 100's) of people in this group alone who has had surgery with a BMI higher than 45.. I know when I get mine done I will be over 45! Actually I'm pretty sure there are probably some whose BMI's were closer to the 70's also! Is she in partner with your surgeons office or someone you see separate?

If it were me I would try to find another surgeon all together. I know you said you have spent a lot of money, are you self pay, or are you insured? I wish you the best!

[SweetnCurvy 112]

Today was a rough day an my eyes burn from crying for hours. 7 months ago my primary doctor suggested I check out Lapband surgery. I never thought it before because I thought it was a cop out but at 300 lbs' date=' back pain, knee pain and a sad future looking forward gaining weight

when I choose to have children.

I decided to start on the path of Lapband and within a week I met with the surgeon, physical therapy, therapist and nutritionist. Everyone said I'm a great candidate for Lapband and just had a few changes to make I.e work out more. So I changed my diet and tried to work out more but working full time and going to nursing school made it all very difficult. Throughout the months I met with the dietitian and she said I was on track and said I needed one more appt with the higher up people and there shouldn't be a problem thinking I would have surgery during Xmas break. I met with these higher people and they proceeded to tell me I am no longer qualified for the Lapband because my bmi was 1.5 points over the max. No one ever told

me there was a max so I was very disappointed. They told me I would be better fit for the sleeve and I should start looking into that. So they made a follow up with the dietitian and another with a dietitian for sleeve diet education. I had an appt with my primary doc who put me on an appetite suppressant which worked great. I lost 14 lbs in 2 weeks. Today I had my follow up with the dietitian which went great for the first half. Then she attacked. She went on and on about how I don't have time for this surgery and because of my work and school schedule there doesn't seem to be much time to make sure I eat right and get to the gym. She said I need to reevaluate life and make myself first. She said maybe after school would be better. I informed her that is two years away. So after 7 months and thousands of dollars later and dozens of appointments she was telling me to give up. I told her I wanted to have the surgery now because I want kids after school and she let me know that I can't have kids until 2 years after the sleeve so I would be well into my 30s before that happened. She said I seems to be doing everything right I just don't have the time. She told me no doc would preform the surgery with a bmi over 45 but no one ever told me that because my bmi hasn't been under 45 in years. She said she was sorry that they lied to me and lead me to believe all of this. I balled right there in her office for 30 mins and I walked out. So here I am still fat, feeling like a failure and no weight loss in sight..... It's been a very bad day.[/quote']

Yeah that does seem weird because I have seen people with BMIs closer to 60 having wls. I suggest finding different providers because you are NOT receiving quality and honest medical care. Good luck!

[soccermomx2 111]

IMO, I feel she overstepped her boundaries. She is there to guide you with dietary issues not your time management. My surgeon's office also has a NUT inside their office that I had to see for 3 months pre-op & I choose to see her at every appt to follow-up.

Even though they work as a team it is ultimately up to the dr & insurance. I would make an appt to speak to the dr. Also, I would find out from the insurance coordinator at their office about if they have submitted your paperwork.

Also, I find it hypocritical of her to judge you for taking steps to get healthy. She should be encouraging you and helping you come up with a plan to be successful NOT belittling and being destructive.

You can also call your insurance company to verify whether you have other options. I wouldn't take the dr office word.

[Susan 2.0 278]

Bel,

So sorry you had to experience this situation. Since your insurance won't cover your procedure unless it's at your place of employment, please consider going self-pay. I don't know where you live, but please do some research on self-pay options. My ins specifically excludes WLS so I started looking at self-pay. 2 reputable hospitals in my area charge 30k for the surgery so I was discouraged, but I kept looking. I think I found my surgeon here on VST. His practice is 2.5 hours away in a small, private hospital in an affluent area (Lake Norman, NC), the staff there is PHENOMENAL, & was only 12-13k. That's less than I paid for my car and the car will only depreciate. I will continually appreciate my sleeve & good health.

Don't give up!! The practice in your place of employment is not your only option. Keep your chin up & I can't wait to hear that you have a surgery date scheduled!!

[grannyk 58]

Why would a nutritionist think she can tell you there is no time to have a sleeve? What the hey!!! My daughter had the sleeve when she was working full time, going to nursing school, had a teenage foster daughter that got pregnant and was then taking care of a baby too. The sleeve was the least of her stressors. In fact she felt so much better while she was losing the weight that I think that actually took some of her stress away. Take control of this situation and do what you know is best for yourself. Good luck...K

[Butterthebean 8,146]

Don't be too alarmed. I have seen this approach many times. Unfortunately it is a favorite "motivational" technique of many football coaches. They tell you "you can't do it" hoping you will prove them wrong. I personally hate this approach, but people still do it. I've never heard of a NUT using it before, but I have heard of physical therapists using it. She is challenging you. She wants to see if you will quit.

.....or she could just be stupid.

Either way, don't quit. But I do agree with one thing. You need to get rid of this mindset that you don't have time for exercise. That may have set her off. You need to make time. It's not optional. Make it happen. It isn't easy, but you need it. There are workout DVDs that can be done at home in 20 minutes. Intense short exercise is just as effective as long low intensity bouts of cardio. You can find 20 minutes can't you?