How Did You Tell Your Gamily And Friends?

[Jimbo_D 28]

Im.scared on telling my friends and family I dont know what they will say .how did you tell them ???

[TamaraS 235]

I wasn't worried about what they would say because I made sure to make my mind up 100% before I told them. I have been really overweight my entire life and they have all seen me struggle with it. my parents were not super supportive but I put it down and made sure they knew not to talk badly about my decision but I did allow them to express their concerns (but only once). My brother was totally against it but again I let him express his concern once and told him I didnt want to talk about it again. My husband was extreemly supportive and so are my friends which was really nice. I can only suggest you set boundaries and let them know what you will and wont want to hear from them. Maybe you can simply say if you are not supportive I would appreciate you keep the negativity to yourself! Good Luck Jimbo!!

[Jimbo_D 28]

I wasn't worried about what they would say because I made sure to make my mind up 100% before I told them. I have been really overweight my entire life and they have all seen me struggle with it. my parents were not super supportive but I put it down and made sure they knew not to talk badly about my decision but I did allow them to express their concerns (but only once). My brother was totally against it but again I let him express his concern once and told him I didnt want to talk about it again. My husband was extreemly supportive and so are my friends which was really nice. I can only suggest you set boundaries and let them know what you will and wont want to hear from them. Maybe you can simply say if you are not supportive I would appreciate you keep the negativity to yourself! Good Luck Jimbo!!

Thamks tamara.i.been also over weight my whole life and im tierd of it I try so hard to go to the gym I play softball and im just tierd always running out of breath and get tierd easy .so yea once I start my program im going to tell them and hope they r really suportive which I know at forst ther going to say just diet and excersize which it failed to many times.but good luck to u

[amykins 202]

I haven't told anyone but my BFF and my hairstylist. Before surgery, I didn't want any negative feedback. Now, I just feel like it's my business. I feel weird sometimes, not telling, when people ask me how I'm losing the weight. But I suppose if someone really wants to lose weight and I trust them, I would tell them.

[Jimbo_D 28]

I haven't told anyone but my BFF and my hairstylist. Before surgery' date=' I didn't want any negative feedback. Now, I just feel like it's my business. I feel weird sometimes, not telling, when people ask me how I'm losing the weight. But I suppose if someone really wants to lose weight and I trust them, I would tell them.[/quote']

Well I would do the same lol I dont want any negative feedback when your all positive about this change .your friends and family should support you no matter what

[TamaraS 235]

I really hope they are supportive of you too! Just remember, if by chance they are unsupportive at first, you have us! This support group has been a HUGE help for me and so many others. You will always have a place to come and express your concerns, ask questions and Celebrate your success. You can do this!! Keep us updated on how things go for you

[Jimbo_D 28]

I really hope they are supportive of you too! Just remember' date=' if by chance they are unsupportive at first, you have us! This support group has been a HUGE help for me and so many others. You will always have a place to come and express your concerns, ask questions and Celebrate your success. You can do this!! Keep us updated on how things go for you [/quote']

Thanks tamara =)

[bbkipps99 48]

Thamks tamara.i.been also over weight my whole life and im tierd of it I try so hard to go to the gym I play softball and im just tierd always running out of breath and get tierd easy .so yea once I start my program im going to tell them and hope they r really suportive which I know at forst ther going to say just diet and excersize which it failed to many times.but good luck to u

Im right there with u man. Been big all my life. Im ready for the change. Like u i like softba and hope to play softball one day.

Maybe see if some1 would go with u to a siminar. Or even tell one person at a time so u can have some1 in your corner give u some relief u know. Prepare for the questions they will ask. I found the more i was informed the more at ease they seem to be. I have gotten alot of "u did alot of research huh"

[lovex5 25]

Thus far i have told my husband, sister (only one sister bc she is thinking of wls and we are super close), mom dad and ex mil (we have a great relationship). Telling hubs was a no brainer for me and i wanted to tell my parents in case something happened to me. My dad didnt say much but rarely does. My mom, who is obese, wouldnt choose surgery for herself but has been cautiously supportive of me. My sister was happy for me and my ex mil was ecstatic for me. I dont plan to tell anyone else yet. I want to share my weightloss updates on Facebook and i think once the comments & questions begin rolling in people will put 2+2 together..or maybe i'll tell then..who knows. I just dont want to tell everyone yet because once told it cannot be untold. I dont want people watching and waiting for me to fail or expecting me to shrink in a matter of 3mo. I've heard from people i know that had wls that sometimes that happens along with horror stories of people failing, gaining it back and/or dying. I sugged take a deep breath and tell the people you choose to tell. Let them know that you and your team of doctors feel this is best for you. Let them know you will need their support and encouragment. Remember why you plan to do this and dont let anyone sway you. Good luck!

[chitowngirl 885]

I really didn't tell any friends. As far as family I do have a lot of over weight people so I felt the need to share, but really didn't want tell every single person and go thru a whole speech a bunch of times. So I utilized our family gossiper. I told my cousin and I was sure she would spread the word, and sure enough she did. So the only people that talk to me about it are those that talk. To me about it are those that are genuinely interested or concerned, s

[michelleooo513 245]

See... I have a different attitude. It is my business but I've pretty much said f*class it.... this is me... this is what I'm doing... you don't.like it then f*ck off. My family and friends have been very supportive of me. My "boy" ( I refuse sometimes to call him my.man if he acts like a child) on the otherhand is hard to read. He really isn't that supportive so hes about.to get the.boot soon... because when I'm all secure withmyself and sexified I'm not gonna have time for the.bullshit. but anyways... I think I told everyone when the idea crossed my mind is when I started to tell people. Good luck to you all!!

[keya34 46]

Well I guess I different because I look at it like if my story or me being strong to choose yo have this surgery just maybe I will inspire some one else so I told my family since I am not the only one struggling here and then I tell whoever will listen. This is Gods body and I am barrowing it till its my time to leave this place but its up to me to take care of it and that's what I am doing. Learning how to eat right. I have never been a selfish person, I believe no one truely can be selfish. So I tell it I try to tell the whole world if I could lol but one person at a time. So i say all of that to say be proud of your choice rather good or bad comments come they are in titled to their own oppion. Stand strong be proud be courageous be successful

Good Luck

[JerseyGirl68 1,172]

Im.scared on telling my friends and family I dont know what they will say .how did you tell them ???

I have a huge family, I am one of 10 kids and I started very slowly. I had all my information and answers and I was satisfied that I could give informed answers to anything that was brought up. I share with my close sisters and mom first when I was in the planning stage. And I didn't really share with anyone else until I was confident in my decision. I figured if I wasn't sure of what I wanted, how could I expect others to be?

Eventually I shared with most, not all, and some very close friends. I reminded them that this was my story to tell, not theirs and hoped for their discretion. I'm also having my gall bladder out so I focused on only that when telling some others I was going into the hospital. Unfortunately there are some people who can't help themselves but try to "Prepare" you. Unless their information is better than yours, don't listen.

Overall, I have gotten tremendous support and I couldn't be more thankful I shared.

Good luck!

[Jimbo_D 28]

I really didn't tell any friends. As far as family I do have a lot of over weight people so I felt the need to share' date=' but really didn't want tell every single person and go thru a whole speech a bunch of times. So I utilized our family gossiper. I told my cousin and I was sure she would spread the word, and sure enough she did. So the only people that talk to me about it are those that talk. To me about it are those that are genuinely interested or concerned, s

[/quote']

Yea I dont know why alot of people dont support it the ones that love you should always support what u do or chose to do .I told my gf and she supports it 100% so I will slowly tell my parents my mom she will tell the family but ill let her tell them later on

[JerseyGirl68 1,172]

Yea I dont know why alot of people dont support it the ones that love you should always support what u do or chose to do .I told my gf and she supports it 100% so I will slowly tell my parents my mom she will tell the family but ill let her tell them later on

I think one big reason people have negative reaction is fear. Fear of the unknown, fear of the one story they heard about someone with a complication. The other I have encountered is simply not knowing what it is like to walk in the shoes of someone that has struggled with their weight long term. They cannot compare needing to lose 10 pounds with needing to lose 100, they just don't know.

Keep the people you count on close, they are who you need.

Good luck!