Portion size: The Neverending Debate

[Bright 9]

I just visited the OTHER board to see what all the fuss was about - (I normally avoid the yahoo boards as I find them kinda confusing - never can find the begining or end of threads...) - and can I just say how shocked I was to read people's responses to Donali and Delarla? I mean, actually SHOCKED - forget about any bandster to bandster respect, what the hell happened to manners or just plain politeness? So apparently some of these "oldtimers" have achieved great things on the weightloss front, well done - but they have become arrogant, rude, and condescending in the process. I may be pretty naive, and perhaps spoiled by mainly visiting "our" friendly forum, but I had no idea people would reply to a query or comment in such a horrendously rude manner.... it's like some horrible 80's teen clique movie - honestly, have I mentioned how SHOCKED I am?

Sheeeeesh.....I'm off to bed shocked. I am genuinely shocked. :speechles :eek :speechles :eek :speechles :eek

[hagerteresa 3]

I gave up on the mexicanbandsters and smartbandsters sites when I found this sight. There was just no personalness to that site. People rarely answered my questions and I didn't find it very helpful. Like the prior person I mainly just found it unorganized and a bit confusing. I just don't like their format. I love the pictures we can add to this site and truly think it is more of a SUPPORT group. I never got any support from those other sites. Its like they took the words "support" right out of the mix. I haven't even bothered to read what they posted towards Lisa and Donali but no doubt I would be furious.

About the half cup servings. Your all right, that may be plenty for someone with great restriction but since I have yet to get a fill my meals are definitely a little more than a 1/2 cup. I AM STILL LOSING!!!! If I was following any particular diet plan it would probably be most like weight watchers. I don't do points but I do keep a careful record of my calories and where they are coming from. Fitday lets me check my nutricianal requirements as well as activities done each day. I love that program!

Alex, did you ever figure out or get advice about the calories burned thing on fitday? It always says I burn around 4500 too including basal, lifestyle and activities. It just seems like a lot to me, but as long as its semi accurate I won't complain.

I thought this was a great topic and have been curious about it for a long time. I thought one of the benefits of the band was being able to eat less than normal and feel comfortable. It sounds like some people in the other forums just think they need to continue to starve and be uncomfortable. Teresa

[donali 57]

One of the reasons I never post on the other boards is because of the reactions to various posts, particularly the ones of people that had real problems. There is some good advice, so I stayed a member so I could learn about stuff from a broader bandster base. Because I had such a rare complication, I felt it ethically correct to post to all the boards I am a member of, even though they really have no idea who I am, since I never participate over there.

To be fair, as far as they are concerned, some total stranger came in, dumped a big problem (which may or may not even be true), and then started challenging valued members of the board who dole out 85% of the advice. Just as some of you rushed to my side and defended me to the "death", so to speak ( ), the members of that board were defending their beloved advice givers.

It is unfortunate for some of the more tender souls over there that the atmosphere is not more nurturing, but boards tend to develop their own personalities, and newcomers are attracted or repulsed by the atmosphere, and the board tends to grow in the direction of personalities that it appeals to.

I'm glad that this board has developed such a warm, kind and caring atmosphere. I like to hear it straight, but I don't care to hear it mean.

Thanks to all who were concerned for my feelings - I am not damaged emotionally in any way, so please do not feel badly on my behalf. I have no further need to post updates to any of my other memberships. A few of them I never even read, but delete the digests as they appear.

And to be honest, I can't help but feel hesitant about continuing to dole out my advice - I would really, really, really hate it if this erosion was somehow my fault, and others had problems because of my advice. I do think I am tainted in that regard, since the cause of my erosion can neither be proved nor disproved.

I can't even give out advice on how to avoid erosion for sure - I wish I knew.

One thing the Inamed guy was able to tell me today, though, was that most of the erosions that are reported are asymptomatic, and are discovered through a routine endoscopy. So I can advise everyone to make sure you have your annual endoscopy, as you may not have any signs or symptoms that your band has eroded until it has gotten very bad. Apparently the band is much easier to remove if it has not totally eroded into the stomach.

Thanks again for all of your support and caring. Just 3 more days of banded life for me... STILL have not hit my century mark! But I'm having a second menstrual cycle this month, maybe that's why. I tell you, I have the WORST menopause ever... lol

[GeezerSue 7]

Maybe we should start a SELF-APPOINTED-EXPERT-FREE Yahoo board.

[hagerteresa 3]

Donali, What could you possibly advise me about that could cause an erosion for me? Don't eat screws or nails??? That might help, but can't think of much else. LOL You lived a bandster life for 18 months and I am sure you had lots of experiences that newbies will find useful. I know you are indecisive about what caused the erosion but it was probably a combination of LOTS of factors most of which are probably just complicated body chemistry. Maybe you did have an occassional bigger than normal meal, SO WHAT! I have heard more than one person mention a time or two of slight over-indulging. I am sure you weren't gurgling acid or anything of that nature. You were the first to tell me NO NO NO SODA! (Which I have stuck by I might add). Your the BEST! T

[hagerteresa 3]

Hi again Donali,

I have been thinking and came to this conclusion: Nobody ever said you were an expert about the band. When/If I ever had a major problem I would run straight to my local family practitioner. He has had patients in the past with the band and is a pretty common sense kind of doctor. He would know what to do if I had a problem. In fact that is exactly what I did when my port wound leaked and wanted to give Old Faithful (I think that is the name of the geiser at yellowstone) a run for it's money.

I call on my fellow bandster friends for those days that we get those quirky temporary sensations or just need reassurance that we are doing everything correctly. I think your advice always sounds very common sense and based on facts. That is why I like it. It just sounds educated. Trust me, if you advised me to do something really wacky or unheard of I am sure I would question it. Teresa

[donali 57]

Maybe we should start a SELF-APPOINTED-EXPERT-FREE Yahoo board.

lol

But then we'd have to put up with the Yahoo! format, and who wants to do that when we can have this type of format instead?

[Alexandra 55]

AARRRGGGHHH! I can't STAND my keyboard!! It has "browser" keys that send me back if I hit them accidentally, and I've lost so many posts-in-progress that way!!

And to be honest, I can't help but feel hesitant about continuing to dole out my advice - I would really, really, really hate it if this erosion was somehow my fault, and others had problems because of my advice.

Donali, this made me want to give you a hug. You continue to be thoughtful and caring in the face of petty nastiness, and YOU are the better person. We <3 U!!

One thing the Inamed guy was able to tell me today, though, was that most of the erosions that are reported are asymptomatic, and are discovered through a routine endoscopy.

Are endoscopies routine? I've never had one. How exactly is that done? I'll ask my doc tomorrow at the support group meeting if he plans to do one annually on everyone.

Donali, What could you possibly advise me about that could cause an erosion for me? Don't eat screws or nails???

Teresa, LOL!!!! Another nomination for quote of the week!

[hagerteresa 3]

Lisa, I wouldn't worry about those pea brains. You inspired me to go check up on that board and I saw what that rude moderator had to say. You NEVER have offended me and quite frankly I enjoy your sense of humor. Can't speak for others but I am glad you are in this group. I have never found those yahoo groups to be useful and always liked this group a lot better because it does seem more personal. Is that just because I get to see your cute little pictures along with your names? I don't know but I do love this group. Have a good day Lisa, Teresa

[donali 57]

OMG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

There was nothing worth talking about after our date, so I wasn't going to back on the show, but the producers made stuff up and told me the guy talked all sorts of smack about me, which boiled my blood. Naturally, I attacked back, and the producers called me after the show and said it was their #1 performance to date and asked me back to do a pilot for another dating show.

OMG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Why the h3ll didn't I get to see THAT show?!?!?! Do you have it on tape? huh? Do you?

I gotta see it... Really. $$$$$$

[donali 57]

Are endoscopies routine? I've never had one. How exactly is that done? I'll ask my doc tomorrow at the support group meeting if he plans to do one annually on everyone.

Alexandra, it is my understanding that all bandsters should have an annual endoscopy. I rarely hear of anyone having one, though, unless they were having problems, so maybe they're not routine?

Anyway, as far as how mine was done, I lay down on the table, they used a fine needle and put an IV in my hand (I never saw what they attached to the needle - there was no bag/bag stand). One moment I was talking to the doc, and the next I was being helped to sit up. I had vague, unpleasant recollections of something big and uncomfortable in my throat, like a bad, hazy dream.

It wasn't bad at all. I like that knock you out stuff - that's weird. I honestly don't remember feeling sleepy, nothing - one moment I was "there", the next I was waking up!

I don't think it took very long, either, but I had to wait so long, and then I was a little spacey after, I didn't have a good sense of the time elapsed.

[New Hope 37]

Lisa, "LOVE CONNECTION"??? You mean we have a t.v. star in our midst? And just how did you meet your husband? Hmmm...

[kellymoos 4]

Where other support board are you talking about? I would like to go read.

[New Hope 37]

Kelly, don't waste your time! That board depressed me big time. I can't say that I learned anything from reading the posts either.

[kellymoos 4]

OOPS! I already did. They are idiots...Donali and Delarla are wonderful!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!