Why Don't I Just Tell People I Had Sleeve Surgery

[The Big Dog 4]

I wonder if others didn't tell everyone the whole truth. I told people I was going to have surgery but changed the subject when asked what it was. I think it is obvious now as I have lost 40# in 3 weeks.

My boss (kinda a jerk, health nut, thinks he can save all us fat people) says I should share with our group and let them know about my journey. This is the same guy who called me into a stategy seesion early to tell me that he was concerned with my health and that I should do something about it....but not to let it impact my performance as I was critical to the company. To clarify I work in construction so it is not one of those touchy feely jobs where we all get together and sing..........

I really haven't told alot of people about the surgery as I guess I am ashamed in some ways that I couldn't do it on my own. I realize I have no reason to hang my head or hide anything as i took a bold step to get surgery and start my new life. I think that people percieve it as some sort of an easy ways out.....(screw those who think that). I instead think that I took a huge step or jumped off the cliff, drew a line in the sand (pick your favorite) and said enough was enough I have to get me right and healty to be around.

I wonder about others opinions on this and if others have done the same as me. I am able to think so clear now that I am geting over the "food addiction" and the Diet Coke high.

[slojo 150]

I told everyone i had vsg , I just didn't feel like having to sneak around about it . I haven't had any bad reactions yet from anyone, matter of fact it allows all my peeps to share in the jorney and encourage me and cheer me on!

[Ms skinniness 3,003]

I'm a year out this month and I don't tell people about my sleeve because it's my norm now. In the beginning I shared with everyone. I do recommend it to my niece who is suffering from obesity and comorbidities of diabetes. I am one that does not like secrets and so I had decided to share with others. I have had no bad reactions that I know of, well maybe from my BIL and SIL. That's basically their problem anyways, so I let them deal with it. I am so happy that I got this sleeve! The best decision I have ever made in my whole life.

[amykins 202]

I haven't told anyone but a close friend and my hairdresser. It's been hard cause everyone asks what I'm doing but I just feel it's my business. My team at work is doing WW so they don't think it's too odd. We had lunch together yesterday and I had Soup while they ate their salads. My family doesn't even know. I know I have a weapon in my fight against obesity but I don't think it's anyones business that I'm sleeved.

[TapSnap 357]

I haven’t had surgery yet but I am a very open person and don’t hide things. I have told all my friends and family so far. At work I started telling a select few that I talked to most but now I am pretty sure everyone knows.

I do get them people some times that ask me why or give me attitude about having surgery. They say I should do it the "right way" and I am taking the "easy way out". But you can win with everyone. I have started seeing a trend where most of the people that make it a issue are ones that are also over weight. I don’t know why but most of the bigger people I have told were discussed that I was getting surgery.

I see it like this, if they are your friends and they don’t understand your problem at hand and make a big deal out of you trying to better yourself then they are not the type of people I want to be around.

Any ways hope everything works out for you and congrats on the weight you lost so far.

[kmoore 97]

I haven't told alot of people, but out of the one's I did tell, I've really only come across one that is very negative about me doing it. Unfortunately, it is my step-mom, who would have been great to have on my side. I think, if you are talking to a person who has struggled with their weight, they are supportive, but for someone that has NEVER struggled, those tend to not understand why diet and exercise alone will not work for us.

I am greatful for those that are so supportive of my decision and look forward to hearing my step-mom's comments post op

[kmoore 97]

I haven’t had surgery yet but I am a very open person and don’t hide things. I have told all my friends and family so far. At work I started telling a select few that I talked to most but now I am pretty sure everyone knows.

I do get them people some times that ask me why or give me attitude about having surgery. They say I should do it the "right way" and I am taking the "easy way out". But you can win with everyone. I have started seeing a trend where most of the people that make it a issue are ones that are also over weight. I don’t know why but most of the bigger people I have told were discussed that I was getting surgery.

I see it like this, if they are your friends and they don’t understand your problem at hand and make a big deal out of you trying to better yourself then they are not the type of people I want to be around.

Any ways hope everything works out for you and congrats on the weight you lost so far.

Wow...I found it the other way around...the heavier people I told were the most supportive. Go figure.

[lovex5 25]

I would have flipped if a coworker or especially a supervisor approached me about my weight. That is absolutely none of his concern!

[LeaveItToSleever 80]

Only one person in the world knows about my surgery. I am guarded about personal issues and privacy. However, in light of the fact that you've already volunteered information about having surgery, I think your boss may be right. I think I'd go public.

As far as "taking the easy way out'... this might surprise or offend people, but in having WLS, I think I did take the easy way out, and if someone made that particular comment to me I would AGREE with them, because it has NEVER been this easy to lose weight. I took the hard way for 45 years, and where did it get me? Where does it get anyone? So if some smartmouth judemental person made that comment to me, I would probably respond with something like "The easy way out... okay, let me understand what you're saying...you're upset that it is easier for me to lose weight because it makes YOU happier when it's more difficult for me? So this is about you?" Then a conversation could ensue where we would get to the bottom of such bitter and asinine attitudes.

My opinion is, why should we suffer and struggle? Why does that make other people happy? My attitude is darn right I took the easy way out... of a CASKET. WHY should it be hard to lose weight or keep it off? Who benefits from that??? I'd love to hear a valid argument from someone who made such a comment.

[Jugee44 9]

I was supposed to have my surgery this coming friday ( Oct 12 ) and yesterday I got a call from my Doctors office saying that there were some new insurance policies that had to be met before my surgery , I was really upset especially since i had already taken the time off from work and lost 10 lbs on my pre op diet. anyway..........

I did not tell anyone about my surgery except for my husband, my 20 yr old son , 18 yr old daughter THATS IT ! . I decided not to tell my boss and co-workers because i just feel that it's non of their buisness . I didn't tell my brothers and sisters because they are always so judgemental and I don't want to hear any drama or opinions since my mind is made up , also because they are always rubbing in my face how much they spend on Gym's and personal trainers and make me feel like I am a weak looser. As for my girlfriends , i did not tell them either only because they would go open their big mouths and tell the rest of my friends .

I figure that I have delt with my weight and all that comes with it by myself and the struggles that i have had , I resolved and managed alone ........... so I am feeling a bit selfish and I can't wait to have my surgery so that I can be the person that I was before and even better ...... and to all the ones that looked down at me and judged me based on my weight ... eat my dust . Lol

My best wishes to you and remember that you don't have to tell anyone if you don't want to , that's your right !

[chelbroyer 10]

I've felt the same way. Didn't people to know because I was embarassed that nothing else had worked, plus I didnt have the total support of my family( who can all lose weight just fine with diet and exercise, I'm the black sheep). But then I styarted thinking like it seems you have, that if anyone asks I will tell them because that was a huge step to take and I should be proud that I recognized what I needed to do for me and even more for my family. I want to be as healthy as I can as my kids grow up, I don't want to be the sideline mom, I want to run with them and play too.

Applause to all who have decided on a healthier, happier life and have made the bold decision to have the surgery to do so. You recognized what needed to be done and did it.

[The Big Dog 4]

Like Tap said I thought it was ironic that when I told heavier people they were critical of it. I think now it is because people are afraid that if I took the step to have surgery and they are in my circle (work,friend or church) that others would expect them to do so.

I can't even count how many times someone, some random ass would make a comment to me about my weight. People I didn't even know. Things like "you should really lose some weight I just thought I would let you know........" or you know that your weight is going to cause you to get diabetis and loose your legs..........

Ignorance is what makes it hard to tell people.

lovex5 I work directly for our CEO so I kept it cool. I more or less said thanks for your concern......I give him credit he has been supportive of me post surgery.....we will see if he is less of an ass as I get thinner....I think he has a problem with overweight people. Which sucks for him cause he could stand to gain a few pounds and loose his ahole tendancies....

[hollirrose 249]

I didnt feel I needed to share my surgery with everyone. At first I only told close friends and family. I was a little embaressed about telling anyone and secretly I was afraid I would fail. I have lost a lot (120 lbs) in a really short period of time... Everyone notices. I am so glad now that I didnt tell any white lies about it. I dont bring it up to anyone but if they directly ask me I own up to surgery. That is not for everyone and it is your personal decision but I can tell you from experience that people will ask and you should plan your response now.

[hollirrose 249]

I can't even count how many times someone, some random ass would make a comment to me about my weight. People I didn't even know. Things like "you should really lose some weight I just thought I would let you know........" or you know that your weight is going to cause you to get diabetis and loose your legs..........

Ignorance is what makes it hard to tell people.

I have always found it amazing that many people feel that it is ok to make weight comments to men. People do it to women as well... But far less often. I guess because you are a man -- you can take it.

[Annie B 89]

I am scheduled for December 19th and also feel embarrassed that something so many people can do... I can't seem to do. I haven't decided what I'm going to do although I know I'm not going to volunteer the info. I'd love to have a great comeback for inappropriate questions, but it is not a skill I have!

I loved LeaveItToSleever's post! She, or he, has the skill I don't have!