Not Sure Whats Wrong

[want2live 29]

I know this is just going to spin like a pity party....and I hate pity parties....but I am having a horrible time today. I ant even look in the mirror I am so ashamed at how fat and ugly I am.

I am in the middle of all my appointment and am Hoping for a December date....but it is getting to me so bad how bad I have become and it is effecting everything I doz

[DanaInNewOrleans 513]

I know this is just going to spin like a pity party....and I hate pity parties....but I am having a horrible time today. I ant even look in the mirror I am so ashamed at how fat and ugly I am.

I am in the middle of all my appointment and am Hoping for a December date....but it is getting to me so bad how bad I have become and it is effecting everything I doz

I'm having the same type of feelings lately. I look in the mirror and want to cry. And I'm supposed to be on my 3 month nutrition program and I've gained 4lbs this month!! I had a lot of different functions this month and a vacation and I was not disciplined. My 3rd appointment is Monday and I'm dreading it. I've even thought about postponing it but that would just delay my surgery. The nutritionist just kept saying no problem if you don't lose any weight ..just don't gain any weight! Well, chalk up another colossal failure..... just getting more and more depressed. I wish my surgery was tomorrow.....

[iegal 460]

Stop the hatred of yourself. You are not unwanted/unloved because of your size. Whether you get VSG or not you are a human capable of many good things just as you are right now. Changing your size will not change how you see yourself but it does change how others view you.

Okay to have a pity party today. But tomorrow you will pick yourself up and remember you are trying to make changes to your life. Give yourself time and allow the process to work.

Hugs - we are here for you.

PS - there will be minor setbacks in the pre-op process & in the weight loss process after surgery. Now is the time to accept no one is perfect...even with VSG.

[kmoore 97]

{{HUGS}} This too shall pass. Just keep trying. At your appointment, explain to the NUT how you are feeling and ask for help. This is what they are there for. Don't postpone appointments, because insurance companies that require 3 and 6 month managed diets also require that your appointments are no more than 30-33 days apart. If they are, they won't count. (Just FYI).

You are choosing surgery because you have struggled on everything else....STRUGGLED NOT FAILED! The bariatric employees know all of this and are there for you...not the other way around. You ARE worth something and you CAN do this girls. Hang in there

[want2live 29]

Thank you ladies for replying. Like I said....I just don't know why I can't get past these feelings. My surgeon has asked me to cut out bread, Pasta, rice and sweets and I have done a really good job and can feel a difference in my energy level (it has been a week and I h net weighed).....but I still hate myself every time I see myself in a mirror or reflection. I am even considering breaking off a long term relationship because I just feel so worthless all the time.

When will this go away?

[want2live 29]

I meant to say it has been a week and I have not weighed. I am waiting until my next appt next week.

[ProudGrammy 8,322]

I am having a horrible time today.

want2live

love your "handle" - it says a lot about you

its ok to feel sad for yourself sometimes

i hope you feel better

good luck with getting your sleeve sooner than later

chin up

warm wishes

[chris54 106]

This process allows you to see yourself as you really are. I have noticed since I made up my mind to have surgery I look in the mirror and see how large I have gotten. I thank God for the revealtion. For those of us who are on this path we all have to look at the facts understand where we are and where we are going. If you dont get that then you may need to reassess your decision. You have support here this process has ups and downs, enjoy the ride and renew your mind to the new you. Concentrate what you will be able to do and accomplish, this is a gift. There are people who need and cannot afford this (no money no insurance). I looked at myself in the mirror the other day and I looked like the good year blemps grandmother (hugh) lol. Thank god i see myself as I really am. In need of VSG Sweetheart it does not matter where we start, but it does matter where we end up. Good Luck P.S. take the time to learn as much as you can about your triggers and how you plan to eat in the future get ready for battle! Success is yours if you want it.

[mwrarr 244]

We all have "that moment." The one that becomes the turning point. If this isn't it, you are definitely approaching it. Take your "name" for example...it's fabulous!! :} Before I even read your post, your name made me smile. It's ok to have a moment of weakness & a little "reality check" about how far gone we've let ourselves go...but always always remember that YOU are here on this planet & on these boards for a reason, and you have every right to a teeny pity party now & then, but you have even more of a right to live the life you love, even if you're still creating it. Everything....is baby steps, one at a time. :}

347*294/285/135 (*347HW/294SSW)