Anyone Not Tell Family Or Friends?

[max206 4]

Just wondering if anyone has had surgery and not told their family or friends?

[Joisey01 87]

I have told my husband and grown boys. I told my supervisor only because he is having the sleeve done on October 23.

[max206 4]

I of course have told my husband but don't feel the need to share with others

[Cat D 12]

My sister had lap-band about 8 years ago. She lost 80lbs. She told no one but very close friends and family. As she started loosing weight everyone came up to her asking how she lost her weight. She lied and said "diet and exercise". Some of her over weight friends wanted advice and help loosing weight. When they weren't successful she felt horrible and wanted to tell them. She was always afraid someone new the truth and she keep lying to them. It was really a struggle to keep it a secret from some and not from others.

I had my surgery last Friday. I have told EVERYONE and I'm so glad I did!!!! Everyone has been so supportive. They are calling me skinny-minnie. Calling and checking on me and when I tell them how much I have lost they are hooting and hollering. I also thought it would give me more accountability when I was out eating with my friends. That's when I always did my worst eating. I'm so glad I've told everyone.

[Cinders 56]

I only told a few close friends & not my family. I knew what I wanted to do & was very positive about the whole thing & didn't want any negatives prior to having my sleeve done. I was sleeved on the 26th of Sept, and returned home from Tijuana on the 29th. I talked to my brother after I got home & he is like you did what in Tijuana LOL!! I said thats why I didn't say anything prior to going, I only want supportive comments. He is great about it & I also told my son (grown & married) last night & he is fine with it too. I am not afraid of telling anyone, I am proud that I have taken this step to make the rest of my life a healthy one

[GeauxForIt 659]

I've only told a few close friends and my boss, but I'll blab to the world after surgery!!

[takroom 192]

I didn't tell my family & friends til after the fact. I had made up my mind about surgery & didn't want any negative feedback or anyone trying to talk me out of it. I needed to stay focused & positive. I sat everyone down & told them when I got back. Everyone had a lot of questions but have been very supportive in my new journey.

[amykins 202]

To this day I have only told my BFF, my boss, and my hairstylist. And you all of course! I didn't tell before because I didn't want any negative feedback. I don't tell now because it's my body, my business. Honestly, most people are so absorbed in their own little worlds that they don't even pay attention. I may tell those who really need to lose weight and ask, but it will be on a case-by-case basis. I think about telling my son. He's 24 and could probably handle it, but I don't want to put him in a position of keeping my secret.

[bakawaka 59]

While I still am unable to recommend to others whether to tell or not about surgery, I want to share a story. I just told a colleague about my upcoming surgery. Her initial reaction was "isn't there another way?" But the week after, she asked me for more information about the procedure to determine whether it might help her husband. So informing others can spread a benefit (but not an obligation to do so). It is a very personal decision whether to inform others. I must say that each person I've informed about the surgery has had an initial negative response. I'm getting better at have a conversation to respond to such comments. My own decision is to inform my family and colleagues.

[mel2643 68]

I was sleeved 9/17 and only my husband , sons and mom know ... No one else ... I already made it a habbit to go to the gym at lunch every day so they really see me eating less and just don't question it .....

[sunshyneqtie 73]

I told everyone except my inlaws. Mother in law to be is very opinionated about everything and doesn't let stuff go, so if I tell her, she will bug her son like crazy.

[mwrarr 244]

My BF & my sister have known from the beginning of this process...& I swore them both to secrecy. I told work that I "may have to have a surgery, but it's not scheduled yet" just to give a heads up, but no details other than "I have an issue with my stomach." I initially told my BFF but she wasn't supportive so I quit updating her after the 1st appt. I finally told my parents 2 weeks ago & gave the mister permission to tell his parents, but he said he'd wait until we had a date. I haven't told my kids yet. (they are 12 & 14) & I only told their dad that he may have to take them for some extra days once I get a surg date, but didn't tell him what I'm having done. It's funny...I'm such an open book, & normally terrible at keeping my own secrets, but this is fiercely mine.

[LadyK 164]

I kept mine under my hat too. I discussed it with my husband, then told my mom and cousin at the begining. I didn't tell my in-laws until afterward. I told my sister I was thinking about it and she said that I shouldn't do it, so I didn't say anything else about it to her. My mom told my sister again, and brother after the surgery. I wanted to keep the circle of people small that I told because I didn't know how they were going to react to me having surgery. My cousin has been very supportive, because she is trying to get her surgery done as well, It's nice to have someone so close to talk about this with. My mom and hubby have be awesome too, my mother even opened her home to my dog, even though she's not that fond of them LOL, so my husband wouldn't have to drive an hour away home and back to the hospital. I haven't gotten any really negative responses just yet but I am prepared to defend why I did this if the need arises.

[MsVeDub 32]

JMO....but why are so many people afraid to tell the truth. This is our lives - not theirs. This is one of the biggest personal decisions you will make - and you should stand proud. Not telling people shows you are hiding. Be proud. Stand tall. If people aren't supportive, tell them that you respect their opinion, but this is your life. Period. I have been very open. Some people try to tell me that I should try this or that, and I have a strong reply to each of them. "I have dieted for 14 years. I will not waste another moment. This is my decision and my life. If you aren't going to be supportive, then don't talk to me about it. I need all the support I can get - keep the negativity away."

Many blessings to all of you!!

[mwrarr 244]

JMO....but why are so many people afraid to tell the truth. This is our lives - not theirs. This is one of the biggest personal decisions you will make - and you should stand proud. Not telling people shows you are hiding

I have to disagree' date=' at least in my case. I'm not lying or hiding, nor am I not proud of the work i've already done or of the decision to pursue surgery or the work I've had to do so far just to get it. But I have a high visibility position in my career & social life, & value my privacy wherever I can preserve it. :}

I didn't tell them bc if they can't be positive, then I don't need their bad juju swirling around trying to mess up my pink & purple sparkly cloud of positivity & clear action that I've worked so hard to create. And on the other side (family), we're just waiting until there's a surgery date. We don't feel there's any reason to get everyone in a tizzy just yet. And no way am I blabbing on Facebook, bc frankly...too many random people are sharing too much random info.

As for work, I work for a big university & people are overwhelmingly negative & trying to claw their way to the next step & I know this would be exploited as a weakness. So, being that it's none of their beeswax, I don't see any reason to do more than give a heads up that they may need to cover my workload (in case I can't get surg date during mid-semester break).

That's just my situation...not that I even need to justify it, but maybe if by sharing it helps someone then so be it. :}