My Suggestion-Stop The Obsessing. Rules Are Meant To Be Broken

[PdxMan 4,292]

Yeah ... this ^^^ surely isn't troll behavior is it? And you passed the psych exam? Hmmm ... definately troll.

[COsleeveDude 273]

Just wanted to make a few comments about "fear" of food and healthy eating. I am one of those people who believes that guidance is advice, and mileage varies.

That having been said, there is a difference between eating healthy and trying to be "perfect." And I think a lot of people, after weight loss surgery, are striving to be perfect, both physically and mentally. But, as we all know, life is not perfect, not an all or nothing proposition. After we have surgery we tend to think that our new life is somehow meant to be a reboot leading toward doing away with all the old joys associated with food, as if food is the enemy.

Do you not fear your most formidable foe? The one that tried to ruin your former life? I won't let that happen to me, and so I decide based on guidance what is right for me. But there is a flaw in this logic, in that learning is experiential, and after the sleeve the food experience is different. If you don't know your new enemy as well as you knew your old enemy, you're gonna lose.

I do believe that if you don't learn to eat more like a "normal" person long-term, you will probably fail. Because if you can't accept the fact that imperfection is part of daily life, then you will continue to live with an all-or-nothing attitude about things that lead to weight gain: food, exercise, having a "perfect" body, and so on.

Life is about f**king up and getting back on the horse. It is okay to f**k up occasionally, but it is not okay to f**k up consistently. It is okay to gain some weight, but it is not okay to gain back too much weight. It is okay to eat a cheeseburger once a week, but it is not okay to eat a cheeseburger every day. It is okay to skip one day of working out, but not two.

The sleeve is meant to help us increase self-control while we learn not to eat as much. That's it. And so, after some of the sleeve effects wear off, we're gonna choke when faced with real life situations if we don't learn to eat unhealthy food in moderation.

[KarissaKhaos 170]

Honesty I haveny dieted at all, I've even more of the healthier things but I haven't given up what I love and yet at 9 weeks out I am down almost 60lbs. Limiting how much I can eat and the portions is what helped me and my sleeve is just a tool. I believe that if you totally cut out everything bad for you that you'll go crazy and fall off track.

[deekelley07 7]

I don't know if 15 months out qualifies as being a veteran' date=' but I'll offer my opinion and hopefully won't be too long.

I totally agree with you for the most part ... but only after you have some time under your belt.

I got this surgery so I didn't have to diet anymore, and I don't. But I also knew my relationship with food was not healthy. I needed to change that, so I changed. But there are reasons why the "Rules" are there.

First off, this is not a one size fits all process. Not everyone comes out of surgery pain free. I'm a sweller. I swell up with any type of injury. Post-op, I couldn't swallow hardly any Water. It was an effort to squeeze down 20 oz of Water a day. I have read some posts, like the OP, who could drink a glass of water immediately. Again, we are all not the same. There is no way on Earth I could have even dreamed of having tuna in any shape or form within two weeks post-op. Half a spoon of cottage cheese was painful at two weeks out. Being careful isn't so much about the pain either, I think. Is every surgeon going to sew a nice, straight, uninterrupted staple line? No, you are not going to break a staple, but what about putting some unnecessary pressure on a gap between staples that was part of a stop and re-positioning?

I don't know about y'all, but I couldn't really even tell when I was full for the first couple months. I didn't measure my food, but I knew that after a couple bites, I needed to stop whether it was due to hiccupping or feeling food coming back up.

So, why do the Drs give us the rules? They need to know what has been going on behind the scenes when you call them with an issue or complaint.

(patient one week out)

"Dr, my upper abdomen feels really warm and the skin is reddish. BTW, I had tuna on crackers last night."

(Dr)

"Well, you didn't follow the guidelines I gave you so, it could be dozens of things. Meet you at the ER."

Eating slowly ...

Hmmm ... go ahead. Don't follow this one. Inhale your food like you used to do. Just post your results here. BTW, good luck with that one. Since you've read all the post-op posts, you'll know what to expect.

Alchohol ... careful of cross addictions. Yes, it is very real.

All I know is I followed the rules and I am at goal. It worked for me. If y'all have read the post-op posts, you will see hundreds of posts complaining about not losing weight while admitting they don't eat the foods they are supposed to be eating.

So, go ahead. Don't follow the rules. But don't complain when you can't get to goal, either. You know why.

And that is fine, too. A lot of people get the sleeve to lose 75% of their excess weight and it works out great for them. It all depends on what your personal goals are.

My advice ... listen to your Dr and follow the rules as best you can.[/quote']

Nice

[Butterthebean 8,146]

And so' date=' after some of the sleeve effects wear off, we're gonna choke when faced with real life situations if we don't learn to eat unhealthy food in moderation.[/quote']

I believe that if you totally cut out everything bad for you that you'll go crazy and fall off track.

So when I read these comments I feel like y'all are saying I'm going to fail.

These foods you're talking about eating in moderation, I no longer crave.

I'm truly asking here, is there no chance for success for someone who has fallen out of love with all those unhealthy foods, and just wants to eat Proteins and green veggies?

[Ready4success 380]

So when I read these comments I feel like y'all are saying I'm going to fail.

These foods you're talking about eating in moderation' date=' I no longer crave.

I'm truly asking here, is there no chance for success for someone who has fallen out of love with all those unhealthy foods, and just wants to eat Proteins and green veggies?[/quote']

Butter, I'm still trying to figure out what is keeping my car from pulling into Burger King. It's not the sleeve doing it, so is it me? Is it that one day, I won't be able to control my car and it will go through BK's drive thru and make me order something? Where did the cravings go, and are they coming back? I don't miss them, but I feel like they're lurking in the shadows, waiting to attack at my weakest moment.

[Ready4success 380]

@pdxman' date=' are you still on your post op pain meds? Really? someone will troll a site and waste their time ? u r too funny. re-read what I wrote. Man. FIRST OF ALL, my doc and NUT met with me. As yours does. We talked about what I have been eating and how well it's gone and what I cheated on.. His plan for anyone on week 3 is full diet.. Protein first and good choices. So, yes, I went shopping after and bought steaks and chicken and pork chops and hard cheeses and you name it. YES< I ATE THEM TODAY . So, my friend, it does work and if you read the replies, many on here also had the same luck. I'm not suggesting that people who can't tolerate the stuff do it and any doc who would tell a patient that is having trouble to progress faster would be a quack.. I'd post my post op diet from them, but not sure if you are a troll on here, who just casually reads posts and makes pompous comments.. :-)

PS. Umm, having ONE friggin Dorito instead of obsessing about licking the powder is not exactly throwing caution to the wind now, my exaggerating friend.

PPS I'm grilling steaks tomorrow. If you don't see me online after, then I guess i'm the person who you can say died from it.. OY.... I also heard when his guests work up, it said "welcome to the world of aids" on his bathroom mirror and then his brother was found in the tub, filled with ice with his liver taken out... THen when going outside he heard a scratching on his car roof and went outside and found it was his friend, dead, hanging from a tree, with his feet going over the car... Then he went for gas and the attendant told him that there was an axe murderer hiding in his back seat.. OY[/quote']

Well, I didn't agree with everything that you said, but felt that if it works for you, then great. No one knows us like we know ourselves. We know we can't stop at just a few, but we lie and make ourselves believe we can. It just got really weird after this post, though.

[Skittle 26]

Gotta love a heated debate! As to the who is trolling who.. I see no trolling at all! I agree w the OP. I'm 2 months out and have been cleared for any food since week 2. Small enough bites, eat slowly... Haven't had a problem even w steak or meatballs.

That being said EVERYONE IS DIFFERENT. And as the OP Stated... Find what works for you...just don't cause yourself undue stress by OBSESSING. Not sure why that is such a bad thing??

[Butterthebean 8,146]

Butter' date=' I'm still trying to figure out what is keeping my car from pulling into Burger King. It's not the sleeve doing it, so is it me? Is it that one day, I won't be able to control my car and it will go through BK's drive thru and make me order something? Where did the cravings go, and are they coming back? I don't miss them, but I feel like they're lurking in the shadows, waiting to attack at my weakest moment.[/quote']

For me it's like a break up after a bad relationship. Once I've made up my mind it's over, I don't look back. And I definitely do not go back for post break up shenanigans. That's just me. I realize some people do.

I know that's a silly analogy, but it's the best I got this early in the morning.

[Ready4success 380]

For me it's like a break up after a bad relationship. Once I've made up my mind it's over' date=' I don't look back. And I definitely do not go back for post break up shenanigans. That's just me. I realize some people do.

I know that's a silly analogy, but it's the best I got this early in the morning.[/quote']

Lol, that's interesting, but I'll take it! I hope ALL my bad relationships stay in the past.

[AllisonWonderland 4]

B

[O.T.R. sleever 3,386]

Butter' date=' I'm still trying to figure out what is keeping my car from pulling into Burger King. It's not the sleeve doing it, so is it me? Is it that one day, I won't be able to control my car and it will go through BK's drive thru and make me order something? Where did the cravings go, and are they coming back? I don't miss them, but I feel like they're lurking in the shadows, waiting to attack at my weakest moment.[/quote']

Garbage foods as I call them are a self sustaining temptation. When you consume white carbs, starches, and sugars they produce a chemical reaction in your body that makes you crave them more. Conversely the longer you abstain from these foods the easier they are to resist.

So to answer your question. Yes, one day you'll be driving down the road and you see a BK, and yes, you will consider hitting up the drive through, but it won't be the intense craving that you remember having.

If you do decide to swing in tell them they can keep the bun & condiments(especially catsup).

[NJSleeveboy 212]

LOL. Love the bad relationship analogy.. So true and how I hope to end up being with food.. I wonder, though, if like this, it's different for us guys.. Sometimes, as men, we go back to bad relationships for one night, just to please ourselves.. lol

[sramos89 260]

It seems that there are two major groups on this forum. Those who get the sleeve and use the tool to eat less and loose weight and those who get the sleeve to kick off a new life of healthly eating, exersice, Protein Shakes and basicly a totally new life. The first group, in which I belong, is a little more laid back, we are going to incorporate birthday cake and margaritas. I would love it if the group of "Sleeve life changer- health nuts" would give us "Laid back sleevers" a break and not accuse of us of being trolls, or giving bad advice. We have a different lifestyle, it is okay not to be just like you, I promise. There needs to be room for both types of people on this forum. When I first started reading I thought the only people on here were health fanatics, I am glad to see there are people who are not running 5k's and drinking Protein shakes 4 weeks out.

[Butterthebean 8,146]

LOL. Love the bad relationship analogy.. So true and how I hope to end up being with food.. I wonder' date=' though, if like this, it's different for us guys.. Sometimes, as men, we go back to bad relationships for one night, just to please ourselves.. lol[/quote']

Hey I AM a guy. And when it comes to food and dating I've made every mistake you can think of. I'd like to think I've learned from them. Time will tell.