My Suggestion-Stop The Obsessing. Rules Are Meant To Be Broken

[Pookeyism 1,143]

I think this is one of the most passive-aggressive posts I have seen here in a long time...I also find the confidence that you exhibit in that what you state is "correct" alarming.

It should be noted you addressed the rules with counter arguments no more supported than the original statement. You worded opinions as facts and suggested at evidence you did not support.

Mostly, so importantly, no - we aren't here because we broke rules or didn't succeed at a diet, you have to ask yourself how you got to your fatness (my word) and understand your habits and your triggers. This is not black and white, or even green-go red-stop as you suggest.

I wish you would re-read and re-think your post.

[Justine13 264]

I enjoyed reading your post. I think I tend to believe the same. I'm 3 weeks post op

Tomorrow. I've been having major cravings and after my lunch- I went to get some frozen yogurt. No regrets- didn't sit the best in my yummy but not terrible. I,too, do not believing in depriving myself but also believe eat Protein first and then see how you're feeling. I did that an still wanted it so I got it.

Thank you again and congrats on your loss!

[funkeechiggen 135]

I think this is one of the most passive-aggressive posts I have seen here in a long time...I also find the confidence that you exhibit in that what you state is "correct" alarming.

It should be noted you addressed the rules with counter arguments no more supported than the original statement. You worded opinions as facts and suggested at evidence you did not support.

Mostly, so importantly, no - we aren't here because we broke rules or didn't succeed at a diet, you have to ask yourself how you got to your fatness (my word) and understand your habits and your triggers. This is not black and white, or even green-go red-stop as you suggest.

I wish you would re-read and re-think your post.

Just to add to your post, I think most of us got to the point of needing surgery because we CAN'T follow the rules!!!! At least that's been my experience.

To the OP: Most of us are food addicts - myself included. I think the "I can and should eat that because I want it and I deserve it" attitude is just setting yourself up for failure. Maybe not now, but down the road I think that's going to backfire on you.

Just my .02.

[NJSleeveboy 212]

@sleevmaster. Sorry, I feel no aggression so apologize if it feels that way. It is my opinion! that's all. Will help those who feel the same way and we are all different. I do list sources. They are from my mom my brother, my brother's bariatric surgeon best friend and my surgeon and my nut.. Not trying to stir any pot, but I read a lot of the posts and too many people are really driving themselves nuts. Prob helps to know that some docs put you on foods on day 2, meaning, don't worry about cheating. .Many have written on here and agree. That's all. I'm a motivational speaker and trainer by trade, so that's probl where you are getting my confidence/perceived arrogance from :-)

[ArtSong 291]

Everyone has a right to their own thoughts and opinions. Take from it what you will read into it as you like. Always ask your doc and do what your doc ask of you to do. I enjoyed the read never once did I put it as the end all of facts. just something to read and maybe some things to ask my doc at the next ap.

[PdxMan 4,292]

I don't know if 15 months out qualifies as being a veteran, but I'll offer my opinion and hopefully won't be too long.

I totally agree with you for the most part ... but only after you have some time under your belt.

I got this surgery so I didn't have to diet anymore, and I don't. But I also knew my relationship with food was not healthy. I needed to change that, so I changed. But there are reasons why the "Rules" are there.

First off, this is not a one size fits all process. Not everyone comes out of surgery pain free. I'm a sweller. I swell up with any type of injury. Post-op, I couldn't swallow hardly any Water. It was an effort to squeeze down 20 oz of Water a day. I have read some posts, like the OP, who could drink a glass of water immediately. Again, we are all not the same. There is no way on Earth I could have even dreamed of having tuna in any shape or form within two weeks post-op. Half a spoon of cottage cheese was painful at two weeks out. Being careful isn't so much about the pain either, I think. Is every surgeon going to sew a nice, straight, uninterrupted staple line? No, you are not going to break a staple, but what about putting some unnecessary pressure on a gap between staples that was part of a stop and re-positioning?

I don't know about y'all, but I couldn't really even tell when I was full for the first couple months. I didn't measure my food, but I knew that after a couple bites, I needed to stop whether it was due to hiccupping or feeling food coming back up.

So, why do the Drs give us the rules? They need to know what has been going on behind the scenes when you call them with an issue or complaint.

(patient one week out)

"Dr, my upper abdomen feels really warm and the skin is reddish. BTW, I had tuna on crackers last night."

(Dr)

"Well, you didn't follow the guidelines I gave you so, it could be dozens of things. Meet you at the ER."

Eating slowly ...

Hmmm ... go ahead. Don't follow this one. Inhale your food like you used to do. Just post your results here. BTW, good luck with that one. Since you've read all the post-op posts, you'll know what to expect.

Alchohol ... careful of cross addictions. Yes, it is very real.

All I know is I followed the rules and I am at goal. It worked for me. If y'all have read the post-op posts, you will see hundreds of posts complaining about not losing weight while admitting they don't eat the foods they are supposed to be eating.

So, go ahead. Don't follow the rules. But don't complain when you can't get to goal, either. You know why.

And that is fine, too. A lot of people get the sleeve to lose 75% of their excess weight and it works out great for them. It all depends on what your personal goals are.

My advice ... listen to your Dr and follow the rules as best you can.

[Butterthebean 8,146]

Neil, I would like to agree with your sentiment about not obsessing, but I disagree with alot of your other assertions. There seems to be a theme to this thread that eating healthy equates to being "terrified of food". That's just not true. Some of us have turned a corner and decided that we want to be healthier individuals. The sleeve will make us lighter, not healthier. Eating less of the same junk that got us here will only make us slimmer unhealthy individuals. And yes, I do believe that eating junk is what got us here, not failing at diets. That was just a bump on the road to surgery. You would have never had those failed diets had you not made poor food decisions in the first place (and by "you" I mean all of us, of course...not singling you out).

And also let me say for the record, I am no veteran, but neither are you (now I mean you, Neil). You're feeling good right now because the sleeve will not allow you to eat much. Down the line that will change. For some the increase in hunger and appetite is drastic. If you continue to oblige your every whim and craving you may end up right back where you started if the restriction relaxes. There are plenty of people here with food addictions, and the advice you're giving them is incredibly irresponsible. It borders on enabling.

You obviously "know yourself"....but you don't know everyone else here.

Just my opinion.

[NJSleeveboy 212]

@butterthebean Believe it or not, I sooo agree with all you write.. I know I'm a newbie FOR SURE! I know it sounds down right righteous to some. It wasn't my intention nor point. My theme was to indeed KNOW yourself and we are all different.. And soo many posts like licking the cheese off the dorito or chewing and spitting.. That sort of thing (ALOT OF IT ON HERE) is what I am referring to! I know I may have issues. When I do, I'll scale back! You are also so right about the food addictions, etc. My psych visit caught all of that (and the recent comments about alcohol and cross addictions). I know for ME, I have no alcohol addiction. Others need to be honest.. Re food addictions, yep, I think all of us have them.. My point wasn't to cave into whims. Junk food indeed got me here.. Or bad choices... I am working on changing that and only time will honestly tell. I don't think I'm enabling anyone, because my point was have the ONE dorito! but, if yuo are the type who can't handle that (only you know that), then don't do it! It works for me.. Same for the 2 pretzels. Etc. So, yes, I do agree with your points and that's why I love this forum!

[Butterthebean 8,146]

Well, either way...thank you for spicing up this forum.

The only reason I say "enabling" is because I think there are some people waiting in the wings to hear someone tell them it's okay to eat whatever they want. They haven't tackled their food addictions and they are hoping for "permission" to go back to their old ways. I know there are some that can learn to eat "all things in moderation." I have no problem with that. For me, I chose to embrace my inner health nut. It's not fear or weakness or lack of self control...it's the desire to live a long, healthy and active life. I'm not depriving myself, or sacrifing. The things I'm doing and the life I'm leading now feel way better than eating pizza and cupcakes ever did (even in moderation). By that I mean that food did not give me pleasure (never did, I just thought it did), so I no longer look to food to satisfy my needs, except nutritionally.

[NJSleeveboy 212]

@butter.. yep, Great point. So good, I put in my post for new readers to make sure they agree. I, of course, completely agree with your point and thus was remiss in being clear. Merci buckets

[It's all new 453]

Similar to many others, I see this as an opportunity to completely change my eating habits. I deny myself certain foods that I might really enjoy - but for good reason. I try to consider how they affect my health and well-being and in what way they assist me in reaching my goal. And I don't mean my goal of weighing a precise number, I mean my goal of being fit and healthy.

I made very poor food choices in the past - that is how I gained a ton of weight and became diabetic. Sure, at this point I could have a few Doritos, or a little chocolate, but what about a year from now - how much more will I be able to eat then? I hope that establishing new and better habits now is what will set me up for long term success. I may not be perfect, but in my mind it is remiss to plan and intend on not creating the healthiest lifestyle possible during this time of incredible opportunity.

Whatever works for you, fantastic. But as you have acknowledged it is a bit early still, and who knows if this will actually work for you?

[marleamay 11]

Neilsleeve, love your post!! I completely agree with what you wrote. I am two months post-op, and have had no problems since surgery. My surgeon and his partner started me on solids in the hospital......eggs for Breakfast, hamburger for lunch. Of course, they said to test it out, see how it goes down, and if no problems, I was free to eat solids as tolerated immediately....proteins of course. I have done very well eating solids right away, and am down nearly 40 pounds. Both of these surgeons are very experienced bariatric surgeons. Anyway, just wanted to say, your post made me smile.....you pretty much wrote what my surgeon has been saying the whole time.

[rybecca20 160]

Enjoyed reading this!!

[NJSleeveboy 212]

@everyone.. I added this for new readers to my opening: "This post is not intended to mean I am sure I will have a long term good go at this! It also doesn't address the future, but really ONLY the many threads that I have read regarding the preo op and post op liquid diets and the Pre and post few weeks Do's and Dont's! "

@newbie. WOW on the soiids in hosptial.. my surgeon did confirm that it won't cause leakage, etc even then, but only possible extreme discomfort, lol.. He does come from the school of theory that the sooner you get back on solids, the better your body responds, so interesting. Thanks for posting that.

[Ijam75 102]

Plenty of people have gotten very sick and ended up in the hospital from eating the wrong foods too quickly.

I'm glad that YOUR doc has laid out a plan that works well for YOU. However, attempting to debunk other members opinions (which they formed from their doc's), by simply offering a different opinion (based off of what your doc told you), really doesn't work. Until some long term studies have been completed, we are all really guessing.

Pick a doc you are comfortable with and follow their rules.

Sent from my mobile productivity killer.