Telling Wveryone Or No One

[It's all new 453]

It is so different for each of us. I have told everyone and feel perfectly happy with my decision. Yes, I have had one friend who did not deal with it well. And I did hear stories about how someone's third cousin twice removed failed, etc etc. But I was very confident about havin surgery and these issues did not make me rethink my decision.

The support I received though - that has made quite an impact. It has helped me through the hard times after surgery, especially the first month or two. It has been nice to have been told how my journey has inspired other people close to me to work on their own health and wellness. I am glad that I don't have to feel that I am deceiving anyone - it would bother me.

I don't fault people who don't share the method of their success, as it is a personal medical decision - but there are many reasons that it worked for me to be open about the process.

Good luck!

[OFFTHEFENCE 2]

I only told a few people...husband, sister, mom & dad. Had my surgery 8/31/12 and have lost 24lbs and no one has said a thing at work. It must be that I am still wearing my same old saggy clothes.

I see no problem with keeping it to yourself. Good Luck!

[ProudGrammy 8,322]

i was surprised/pleased at the positive feedback i got from family. they were very excited, asked many questions, and were happy for me

i told a few other people, response was different - nothing negative was ever said. no one said the common "easy way out" anything like that

many people just looked at me and couldn't think of what to say next. since there was some silence i would say something like "this isn't the easy way out you know" then i would start going into my new way of eating, how little i ate - i was DEFENDING myself - how crazy is that

didn't tell anyone since then............in the future who knows - 9 1/2 months post op - no intentions to tell anyone else

[changes4me 4]

I chose to tell only my husband, kids and parents. I didn't want anyone else to know. However, my dad, who is 76 and my favorite person in the world; likes to talk. Apparently he's told a couple of people and the word has spread throughout my extended family. Dear old Dad doesn't remember saying anything to anyone though. God love him. So far, nobody has said anything to me directly. My brother's gf asked my mother if I had surgery yet; and without thinking, Mom said yes. Then the brother's gf went into a long lecture about how she can't believe I would do something so drastic, there's no getting that back, and why would I do that, etc. I'm not really sure how Mom answered her questions, don't really care. The only person to support me from the get-go was my husband. My 19 year old daughter said I was taking the "easy way" out. My Mom and Dad didn't think I should do it because something could go wrong and I could end up worse off. I understand they love me and worry. But ultimately, it was my decision and my decision alone. I only regret telling my Dad because he has no filter. LOL. Good luck to you!

[tigerbelle 328]

Like most others have said, I think this is a personal decision, and there is no right or wrong choice...I have had some serious health issues as a result of my diabetes and severe obesity, including a couple of significant leaves of absence from work for health reasons...there really is no way--even if I wanted to--that I could have "hidden" my health problems. I have also been fortunate in the past to have had much needed support from family, friends, coworkers and fellow worrshippers at my church. I very well may need their continued support in this next step in my journey to find health--both physically and emotionally. While I am not telling anyone and everyone, I am sharing my decision with those who have supported me in the past.

[Mich grand 35]

Good for you. I think you are a strong person and I hope to follow your path. I have told those that will

Support me and encourage me. I am not going to worry about hurting feelings or what anyone thinks. This is about me. And for a change in my world. I am only going to think about me. At least until I am we'll on my way to success.

[altagirl 127]

I did not tell anyone. No one at work even knew I had surgery. My daughter knows I had surgery but she didn't even ask what it was for (she is 14). I had my surgery in Mexico so I did most of my recovery days there. I went back to work soon after my surgery with little discomfort. I only had 2 people ask me if I was ok - but did not pry.

I was considered a "lightweight" when I had my surgery and when I was throwing the idea around a year ago there was so much negativity that I did not want to deal with it. I also didn't want people to say, "if you would just excerice, eat less, or have less stress, etc, etc" The fact is that I have tried everything and the 50 pounds became 70 and if I waited any longer the 70 would turn into 90.....I decided to do this BEFORE I got to a high BMI (my BMI was 33 on day of surgery).

I have only had one person ask me if I have lost weight (I am down 14lbs since surgery) but she didn't even ask what I was doing! I think because my weight loss will not be as dramatic I won't have many people talking about it compared to someone who has more weight to lose.

Good luck with what you decide - I am very happy with my decision to have the surgery and keep it to myself!

[Phi Phi 4]

I only told my husband, son and mother. No one lee knows. I'm a slow looser, so no one has suspected anything.

[LessofKelly 62]

I told three friends, my father and a job I was interviewing at. I wanted it kept private, my father, however, is an old Italian with a big mouth. Everyone knows. His neighbors (he lives in the house we grew up in), his entire side of the family, my mom passed last year but we had to go to a memorial service recently for one of her cousins and before I even got there everyone there knew (I didn't know anyone there even though they were family, awkward) and of course once people know it's all they want to talk about. If you want your "secret safe" (not that it has to be a secret, but if you prefer discretion) make sure whomever you tell comprehends that.

[Skyjack1 105]

I told limited people before I went to Mexico. I was sick of hearing everyone say I was crazy for getting it done and going to Mexico. When I got back with zero complication I told everyone. I like to tell my story to maybe help someone else out since most people are not aware of the sleeve.

[Mimz 38]

I still haven't had surgery, but I Have told my hubby and mother in law who live in the same house. My babies are too young to understand 4 & 2. I have told my mum and sister and my dad will just get told when he asks how I lost it lol!

The rest can just guess how I did it!

[skinnymehereicome 5]

At the end of the day. R the negatives going to put u down. I was so excited i told everyone. And i couldnt have gotton any more support. How u suppised to explain fast weight loss or eating puree food. Good luck but dont be ashamed. Ur looking after ur health.

[SweetC 4]

As said before by others, sharing the information is a personal decision. You know your family, friends, co-workers and etc. and how they would react and how you will be able to handle their responses. As for me, I was so excited and happy I finally had made the decision to be sleeved and was confident in my decision until nothing negative I had heard in the past could shake me. I told everyone and the support was amazing! I had heard about all the horror stories and know personally many success stories. I had to do it for me and there are no regrets. The support from everyone has been nothing but positive. Those who had procedures before me offered to help anyway the can. I am almost five months post op on the 5th of October and 45 pounds from my goal. The support from everyone continues. So you do what is best for you and not anyone else but support is golden!

[klaaspice 4]

Keeping it to yourself is fine however, don't answer that it was "the old fashioned way" - that's completely disingenuous and gives people a false impression.

Personally, I tell everyone who asks me. This is my journey, my decision and my life and I want to be honest with people and speak my own personal truth. I would NOT have been able to lose weight "the old fashioned way" and the sleeve is just a tool to help you get to your goals and I wouldn't want to be fake and tell people that I did it myself, when i didn't. I don't mind telling people and when anyone says anything negative, I just chalk it up to their ignorance. Most people are so supportive and so kind.

[Butterthebean 8,146]

I took several weeks off work, then came back and lost 125 pounds in less than 5 months. There is no way people weren't going to guess I had surgery. So I tell everyone who asks. I haven't heard anything negative.