female only Anyone Else Married To An Alcoholic?

[Wolfgirl1978 256]

My husband, before we got married, last October did confide that he was a recovering alcoholic. I guess I did not understand exactly what that meant until recently.

We got married on 10/31/2011. In January, I thought he was having a stroke, but right as I was about to call 911 he confessed he had just guzzled a bottle of vodka, thus the slurring and stumbling. There have been many more incidents since then like this one. He has even been to some AA meetings to try to appease me.

Last Saturday he was drunk before 1030 in the morning. He had went out to buy donuts, and guzzled a bottle of tequilla on the way home. He tried to lie and tell me some melatonin made him do all that. Then he went to drive himself to get something to eat. Later during the week, sober this time, he got mad at MY 5 year old and slap him on the leg pretty hard. This weekend was the straw that broke the camel's back. Me and my mother went out of town together, and he promised me he would not drink, since the previous week had been pretty bad. When I got home he was trying to change a spare tire, and when he spoke his speech was slurred. He said he had taken his Xanax and that it made him do it. When I went into our room to unpack, I noticed glitter all over our floor, then I saw all the knick knacks on my bookshelf were broke, and everything was askew. I also noticed our dresser was all crazy and pushed into the wall, and the aquarium was on the edge of the dresser. I asked him about this and he denied knowing anything about it. Well I told him that he needed to come look, because if he did it, then one of his teenage daughters had been in our room. Well finally he fessed up he had been drinking and he woke up and there was a mess, and he doesnt remember anything. He stated his nose was broke, he had bumps on the back of his head, and his face was all scratched up and he didn't remember anything.

I went and spoke with his 16 year old, who has Aspbergers, and she states that he was out of his mind, he fell face first on hearth of fireplace, he fell off of the couch several times, he tried to put on a tank top in the dryer like it was pants, he kept walking into walls and he left the house in his car twice.

Folks, this was enough for me. I know its supposed to be through thick and thin but I cannot raise my 5 year old like this. He has made several promises to me about getting help, and only does it for a day or so. Don't get me wrong, he is not verbally abusive, or physically abusive, and he's been a good husband except for this. My sanity is shot. My son and I moved to my parents last night, and I am looking for a place for us. I just had to vent.

[Minckle 87]

Have you ever been to an AlAnon meeting? As the former wife of an alcoholic, may I highly recommend that you attend one ASAP?

[TamaraS 235]

Im Glad you and your son got out of the house. Its the best for both of you. I have a very close friend who has been dealing with a acoholic husband for the last 10 years and it has completely effected their kids and nearly destroyed her life. Sorry you are going through this. Stay strong, you and your son deserve so much better!

[slojo 150]

You did the right thing. Sounds like he's picking up right where he left off from when drinking before... Yes, i'm married to an alcoholic...He is a hard working, ethical, responsible, loving person but he is an alcoholic. THat's hard to say, and most people would never DREAM that I or him have this problem. He does not beat me mentally or physically when drinking but boy does it get on my nerves...He's a daily drinker of beer and on an occasion drinks Jim Beam. THat's the part i hate, the Jim Beam...I left for a year and a half because he used to drink and start bitching but he learned to not do that now... I love him and it's sad. It has started to affect his liver, he says he's getting ready to quit (right before he pops the top on another cold one), maybe he will maybe he won't i can't control that. All i can do is watch and wait and see. I pray he does soon. People who know him at work would really be surprised that he can be as high functioning as he is if they were to see him this next weekend...Take care...

[ArtSong 291]

Been there done that you did the right thing

[Tekara3927 265]

You did the right thing. Stay strong. Everything happens for a reason. I'm sorry this has happened to you.

[iggychic 1,405]

The only thing you haven't don't correctly is to report his license number and a descriptor of his vehicle to your local police. If he has usual haunts or trips tell them when, work, or whatever. You saved your life and that of your child, but he may kill me and mine. You owe his victims that....and by the way, it might be the only way for him to get sober....some jail time.