Messed Up & Need Advice

[Guest deleted_user]

I had my surgery on August 7th and I had a minor complication. I vomited the Water that was used to test my new stomach for a leak and that caused a bad case of heartburn/acid reflux. I could not keep anything down for 4 days and was on IV. I vomited everything I tried to drink then and it was the most painful experience ever! Finally, I was able to keep some Gatorade down and was released.

After getting well, I started messing up my diet. It eventually got to the point where I advanced to solid foods by the beginning of the 2nd week. I am extremely regretful. I don't know why I did what I did. The only way I can justify my failure to follow obvious directions is because I'm irresponsible. I'm also dealing with emotional/head hunger and another part (hate to blame it on someone other than me or make it seem like I'm some victim) is pressure from family to eat, since I never had their support to have the surgery. They also keep ridiculing me and telling me that I asked for all the pain I am in now.

food doesn't taste good and it doesn't feel good. I have heartburn/acid reflux that is so painful, I can't sleep. I tried Famotidine (20 mg) -- didn't improve much, and moved on to something stronger today -- Zantac (150 mg).

I really don't know what to do and I was hesitant to post about this because I'm afraid of the harsh responses I may get when I already feel bad. I read that eating solid foods during the first 3 weeks can cause a leak as the staples have not fully healed yet and that really scares me! I'm wondering if anyone else messed up like me and how they've healed? And if they're able to enjoy food again? I also don't know -- What should I do now? My doctor isn't responsive.

[Izuri 428]

I'm sorry to hear that you're having such an awful time. I think you are strong to admit you need to get back on track. You can get back on track. I would go 100% back to basics. Start again as if you had just gotten sleeved and let your doctor know what's been going on. They need to keep a close eye on you to make sure you don't run into any complications. I don't really enjoy food at this point (5 weeks out), but I make myself eat on a schedule and keep track of it.

You should join Myfitnesspal or some other tracking website and add people to try and get some feedback on your days. I do not have acid really, but if you are, I would bug your doctor until they talk to you about it. They need to be responding to you, you deserve follow-up care. I was on prevacid for a month post-op, and I'm sure that had an effect on the acid.

If you are having trouble eating around your family - eat away from them. I know that sounds really hard, and maybe they will resent it - but you're dealing with a health issue here, they will get over it in time. Right now, you need to be able to focus on you. Do you have any friends close by that support you that might be able to spend a couple days with you while you get back on track? Weigh everything you eat. I can't eat more than about 2oz of Protein at a time, and maybe a few soft veggies/fruits pieces.

I also think it sounds like you need to see a therapist and join a support group. You aren't alone. Head hunger is a crazy hard thing to deal with, but you can figure out strategies to get through the day. Post your goals on the refrigerator door. Make a list of all the things that you want to be able to do. Make a list of all the reasons you don't want to be overweight anymore. Stick some motivational post its to your mirror so you see them every morning.

The only thing you can do from here is move on. Get back on the program, get some guidance from your doctor, find some support (which you deserve!), and start over. Keep an eye out for the signs of a leak, and that's really most of what I can think of. Don't give up. You can get through this.

[prettysleeved1 173]

Keep contacting your doctor until he responds.

My question is why let your family pressure you into eating when they didn't support you to begin with? You know they aren't doing it out of love or concern so why play along? It's like playing William Tell with your arch enemy and you're the one with the apple on your head.

I'm not a doctor so, again, keep contacting your doctor and more importantly be honest and when you finally get him.

[desertmom 297]

Hi

Step back and breathe.Now get back to where you are suppose to be with your post op diet.Eat smaller portions,not too often,track your food and do not overeat.

If you have heartburn stay away from acidic foods,fruit and drinks that has citric acid or any other preservative in them.

Eat slowly and away from the family for now.They might mean well but it isnt helping.Make your own food.< /p>

Just start again.And small portions to not overeat while being very selective with your food is extremely important.

Then,let us know how you are doing in a few days.

xxo

[Ready4success 380]

Contact your doctor, and if you can't get in touch with them, call your NUT. I also think you should go back to a full liquid diet, and do it the way you're supposed to. I know no one is perfect, and we all make mistakes, but remember you can seriously hurt yourself by doing these things. I also think you need to examine why you did it. My family cooks huge meals everyday, and I just go to my room during dinner. Once I can start exercising again, I'll use the dinner time period to go for a walk. You did this to make yourself healthy and happy, don't let them sabotage it. Good Luck, and I hope you get back on track, safely.

[Lissa 2,631]

Print your post, then go see your doctor asap, even if it means camping out in his/her office. I think you need to also see a therapist to help you deal with your underlying food/family issues. It sounds like you need more support than you're getting and your family is actively involved in sabatoging you. You need someone to help you cope with them. There are anecdotal stories of people who have done what you are doing (eating solids too soon) who have died. Please GO SEE YOUR DOCTOR today.

[doxieville 799]

I'm so sorry that you've had a rough time. Everything that our fellow slevers have told you is excellent advice, please do what they suggest. Remember, food can be an addiction, yet we need it to survive, so that makes it extra hard for us to deal with.

Did you see a mental heatlh person prior to your surgery? A good one would have spotted where your potential downfalls are and give you tools to help you. Families can be SO distructive!! Can you stay with a friend for a few weeks? It is going to be really hard for you, and them, to break the patterns of behavoir that put you in this position in the first place. If you can afford it, I'd strongly suggest that you see a mental health doc once or twice a week for a few months until you get stronger & learn behavoir skills.

Good luck, and please give us updates.

[Threetimesacharm 1,400]

Look, I don't mean to be rude but how old are you? This is a major life changing surgery and it sounds like you are not prepared to deal with it. As another poster said, YOU CAN DIE!! Are you ready for death? You need to say, F**K my family and look after yourself! You are in this chin deep and there is no going back. So buckle down, go see your doctor, and STOP eating solid foods!

[willowee2003 0]

Just want to reiterate what everyone else said CALL YOUR DOCTOR AND KEEP CALLING. Until you can reach them, I'd go back to taking just Water and Protein shakes/protein drinks. You body can get by on just that- it really is plenty! You probably haven't done anything irreversible yet. For the reflux, ask your doc about going on Nexium, which is a higher class of anti reflux drugs. That is what I was taking before my surgery, and it's what I continue to take. You can open the capsule and take it in a little sugar free applesauce.

I'm really sorry your family isn't supportive. Does your surgeon/team know this? I hope there are lots of support groups you can go to, and that you find a good therapist.

Look, we are all here because we have issues with food. I think we can all relate to making a food "mistake" in our lives- binging, going off a diet plan, etc. But now is the time to realize that for your health and safety, you have to be strong enough to beat back those urges. Maybe you weren't as emotionally prepared as your thought you were. It happens. But it's time to MAKE SURE you get emotionally prepared and fast.

Also- try and spend less time with your family. Don't sit down to dinner with them. Eat with friends who aren't going to pressure you, or better yet, eat alone for awhile. Food is social and food feels like love, but there are lots of other ways to connect with people. Meet a friend for tea. Go for a walk. See a movie. Go to a museum. You can do it!!!

GOOD LUCK! I feel for you.

[TamaraS 235]

I feel you so much. Today my dr. allowed me to eat soft foods and I went over board. My portion sizes were too big, i felt starving all day and I ate 5 saltines. I never thought I would behave this way. Tomorrow is a new day and I have to get back on track and I am sure you will too. its really hard figuring out when your full, jeeze the entire eating again is hard. I really hope things get back on track for you. Please keep us updated (((((((huge hugs)))))))))

[Guest deleted_user]

Just wanted to thank all of you (those who gave me a reality check as well as those who were supportive). I'm 2 months post-op now and I'm 5 lbs away from being half way to goal.

I definitely was not as emotionally prepared for surgery as I thought I was. I can't go see my doctor or NUT. I had my surgery in Mexico.

Thanks for the tip about citric acid, that was major help!

I have been seeing a therapist for a month now. Just 4 sessions so far but they have been EPIC! I write down all the uh-huh, revelation sort-of moments/thoughts that I have during sessions and they're so empowering, especially since I don't have any support. My therapist is very affordable and specializes in dealing with bariatric patients. I also started seeing a counselor at school on a weekly basis to help me with some other, non-surgery related issues, and my self image has dramatically changed in such a short time.

I'm definitely learning that this journey is about discipline more than anything and that self control is key -- why most of us failed in the first place. I run a mile everyday and I learned how to swim two weeks ago (I'm 25!). I have found that I'm much more willing to commit to exercise when it's something I enjoy... Acid reflux is still a major issue but once I dropped the Zantac and picked up a generic for Omeprazole, I significantly improved.

Quick Tip: Don't order Shakeology! It's a waste of money and tastes like dirt! Syntrax nectar in chocolate Truffle is boss!

Thanks again to all of you and I wish you all the best on your journey!

[TamaraS 235]

I teared up while reading your update, I am so incredibly happy for you!! Thank you so much for sharing your story, its really hard to admit when your having problems and get off track but just know it took a ton of strength to share it and it will help many of us on our journeys <3. NO ONE can prepare for the mental part of this, regardless of age. It is shocking when we come face to face with what a big part food plays in our lives. Its especially hard for those of use who have a severe addiction and turn to it for any and every thing life throws at us... Keep up the excellent work Purple!!! I am going to add you as a friend so I can follow you progress!

[altagirl 127]

Since you had surgery in Mexico (I did too, with Dr Ortiz) I would suggest going to your PCP. If you don't have one, now is the time to find one. Dr Ortiz has been great in communicating with me and with my PCP.

Good for you to learn to swim - that is great exercise. Also, congrats on the weight loss so far. Just get back on track now and don't look back except when you need a reminder of how it feels to go off plan!