Jump to content
×
Are you looking for the BariatricPal Store? Go now!

Fat On Fat Prejudice?



Recommended Posts

In another post, someone mentioned fat people bashing other fat people. The fat on fat thing is an interesting phenomenon. I'm embarrassed to say I don't really like fat people that I don't know. I think it's because I don't like myself and I blame myself for the condition I have allowed myself to deteriorate to. I look at them and see me.

But when I had lost weight in the past I was very, overly friendly to them. Maybe because I knew how they might feel about themselves and could sympathize when I "wasn't" in the same situation.

Am I alone? First psych appt. tomorrow. Is she going to have a field day with me?

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I never disliked other fat people. I am usually more focused on keeping my stomach in and trying to look as small as possible lmbo!

:D

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I was rarely ever around anyone as big as me. Now I've shrunk and I see some folks I've passed up, and I have to bite my tongue not to give them my surgeon's phone number. I don't hold any ill will toward obese people, but I just wanna say, "hey, this tool will help you too."

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I don't know that I dislike other fat people - but I sure as heck compare myself to them in my head. I think I have a hard time understanding how I look like to other people so I wonder to myself "Do I look that big too?" or something like that. I think I'm more likely to feel embarrassed for them, mostly because of my own embarrassment about my weight. But I have some fat friends too.

I could see where this would be common though, probably exactly what you were saying, disliking them because you dislike yourself.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

It is interesting when people criticize or feel superior, yet they themselves can't lose weight and keep it off, exercise regularly, eat healthy, etc.

People are just naturally wired up to be shallow when it comes to criticizing physical issues.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I have to admit, (where's the confessions thread again?) I've hated on other big girls before. It may be for different reasons than others above cited. Being fat my entire life I am lumped into a group of stereotypes with every other overweight woman. I try, and believe I succeed, daily to defy those stereotypes. I don't dress in baggy clothing, have poor hygiene, eat fast food everyday, have a less than average IQ, sleep with every guy who shows interest in me, etc. These are some of the stereotypes of big women so when I see some doing these exact things it pisses me off. I don't want to be put in a box with those women. I don't want them to reflect poorly on me. I try to "represent" for what big beautiful women can be (even though I'm shrinking now).

However, if I see or meet another plus-size woman who dresses nicely, speaks well and walks with their head held high, I feel an instant kinship with them and will usually make an effort to make conversation as well.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

After reading this thread I discovered something interesting about myself.... Though I have no issue with looking in the mirror and calling myself fat, I just can't bring myself to use that word on someone else. I don't know it just makes me realize I should be nicer to myself.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I'll admit that I don't like fat people who are sloppy, lazy, and fulfill every other stereotype about fat people. I feel that no matter what size you are, you still need to have a sense of pride and I hate seeing fat people in mumu's and run-over shoes and looking generally unkempt.

And yes, I do and always have distinguished myself from those types of fat people.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I don't like this thread I think something's or left better un said ..

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I don't like this thread I think something's or left better un said ..

I agree i hate the F word. I just cant bring myself to use this adjative on another person.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Maybe you'll think I'm nuts, but I've always liked fat people. I felt like we shared a common misery and that they would be easy to connect with because they had suffered as I had and knew the cruelties of others as I did. Weird how we all have radically different views!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I don't like this thread I think something's or left better un said ..

I agree i hate the F word. I just cant bring myself to use this adjative on another person.

That's likely why it's in the "rants and raves" section.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I find myself

Preaching to em. Like "mortgage your house your kids your car....whatever you have to do to break this addiction that is ruining your life and have the surgery." just like they are drug addicts, what I have to realize is that most of my friends and strangers don't want to hear this cause they think they are "not that big" I feel their pain but they totally gross me out when I watch the massive amounts of food they eat but only because that used to be me........

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I have to admit, (where's the confessions thread again?) I've hated on other big girls before. It may be for different reasons than others above cited. Being fat my entire life I am lumped into a group of stereotypes with every other overweight woman. I try, and believe I succeed, daily to defy those stereotypes. I don't dress in baggy clothing, have poor hygiene, eat fast food everyday, have a less than average IQ, sleep with every guy who shows interest in me, etc. These are some of the stereotypes of big women so when I see some doing these exact things it pisses me off. I don't want to be put in a box with those women. I don't want them to reflect poorly on me. I try to "represent" for what big beautiful women can be (even though I'm shrinking now).

However, if I see or meet another plus-size woman who dresses nicely, speaks well and walks with their head held high, I feel an instant kinship with them and will usually make an effort to make conversation as well.

You wrote everything in my head!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

  • Trending Products

  • Trending Topics

  • Recent Status Updates

    • LadyVeteran1

      Sleeve surgery is on April 14th.  I am counting the days!!  Can't wait!
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • buildabetteranna

      Down 33 lbs and slightly stalled, but I'm gonna reevaluate and push through. I started back to work last week after 2 years of being disabled due to mental health as well as my weight. It's a great job and I'm just so happy to have this opportunity at a second chance at life. Hope everyone is having their best journey ❤️ Together, we got this!
      · 2 replies
      1. DaisyChainOz

        Great work Anna! Keep it up 😁

      2. buildabetteranna

        Thank you ❤️

    • Bashbee91

      Hey guys new to the process looking forward to this new life. 
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Bugg

      Hi everyone! I’m brand new here. I just went through all my pre-op requirements per my insurance company and now everything has been submitted and I’m just waiting for final approval and my surgery date. I’ve been doing research, watching YouTube videos, TikTok’s, ect.. trying to prepare my mind and what to expect so I’ll be ready for the surgery. I was so sure and so set and so ready and excited. However, now that I’ve done everything & it’s almost here, I am sooooooo scared! I know why I want it bc I’ve tried everything and I just don’t feel like I can lose weight by myself. I’m tired of being overweight my entire life. I’m miserable, but I keep psyching myself out afraid of GERD bc I know how that can be and I don’t want to have to get a bypass after already gaining the courage to even get VSG. I’m scared of complications like I’mgoing to regret doing it and be depressed that I didn’t just be more disciplined and try again to lose the weight on my own even sitting here typing this knowing in my mind i just can’t and don’t possess the discipline. I’m also afraid I won’t be able to handle the restrictions of the sleeve. What do I eat? I don’t know how to eat healthy really and don’t enjoy healthy food. I don’t know how to do this! I feel so defeated!Someone tell me they felt anything similar to this or am I not ready? I thought I was. I am so tired of being sick and tired and so tired of myself and so tired of being stuck and stuck in this body and somebody different on the outside from what I feel inside. I just want to ball up and cry.
      · 1 reply
      1. stevieoriole

        Am feeling this right now. My surgery date is 4/1. Sign the consent tomorrow. I feel like I overloaded myself with too much info, too many opinions. Got to the point where I was wondering if I should do this. Then I thought of my reasons for taking this step and that settled my nerves. Still get moments of doubt but am striving forward. Am just going to follow my book from the surgeon. Joined this because I was told by my dietician that I should do this for support

    • buildabetteranna

      over 20 lbs down since4 the pre surgery diet and surgery on the 14th
      · 1 reply
      1. Selina333

        Yay!! Congrats. I know how good that feels. 🤩

  • Recent Topics

  • Hot Products

  • Sign Up For
    Our Newsletter

    Follow us for the latest news
    and special product offers!
  • Together, we have lost...
      lbs

    PatchAid Vitamin Patches

    ×