What Was Your Final "straw That Broke The Camels Back"

[traceyinflorida 499]

Thankyou everyone for your stories! I'm so proud of y'all!!!

Umm, it was one straw for me but does need slight background- I was a pageant child, always the prettiest little girl, who got fat as a pre-teen. Bad diet, not really encouraged to exercise.

Finally decided I was old enough to go on a "diet" or "healthy eating plan" as it was beginning to be called. Became obsessed, lost all the weight and more and nearly died of anorexia. Oh and it started as a "whim to be slim" like my friends, but Ive never really had body confidence issues, I like the way I look, I don't mind my body physically and have always had luck with the opposite gender I just fell in LOVE with the high of not eating, doing something everyday that no-one else could do- starve myself! I was quite good at it

Anyway, "Recovery" was kind of "easy" once i found the perfect dietician, but obviously my mind was still messed up. I thought "hey, I beat it, food no longer controls me!" I could eat whatever I "wanted". Needless to say I "kind of" exploded in size... About 100-110 pounds up to 200 in less than a year!!!

I tried to cut calories again but started having panic attacks and even suicidal thoughts. Started yo-yoing up and down until I hit 300 pounds.

I was delusional by then, I would just not eat for as long as possible then binge out of starvation. But I didn't compensate with laxatives or vomiting, I just moved on, and the cycle continued. People think I must love food, but most of those who know me well can see how I try to ignore that I'm eating. I pick cheap easy (ergo high cal) foods that can be consumed quickly with little thought involved...

Then the straw- I got aspiration pneumonia from a common cold. Went to sleep Wednesday and woke up Friday with tubes and needles everywhere. Bedridden for five more days and anything that was left of my core muscles went and my lumbar discs began to bulge.

Enter stage left- EXCRUCIATING pain all down lower leg and foot. Sledgehammers, needles, tourniquets cutting off feeling and blood supply... All of the above.

Asked doctor obvious question: is it my weight... Obvious answer: yup- lose it and it will go away but in the meantime here's a huge number of scarily addictive drugs to take...

I have psych, dietician, GP, physio, alternative therapist and partner's support this time but I'm still scared. Though not scared of the surgery per se, rather- will I mess this up too? Will I ever "get over" food?

It's been a few months now, lost 25 pounds pre-op, had a sort of bad week last week but am back on that sturdy old horse, 9 months until in ready for surgery and look out world!!!

Thanks for reading, I havent seen many people on here with "eating disorders" so I thought I'd share...

God bless.

Thank you for sharing your story. I will pray for you that you can wrap your arms around this with your medical team. It will be hard work, but you can do it! Great job on your 25 lb loss already! Keep up the good work. Nine months will pass by in a flash (that's about how long I had to wait when all was said and done) Keep us posted!

[Cookeeeeez 269]

Thankyou Tracey, I really appreciate your prayers and kind words... I'm doing a bit better again now, I still sometimes zone-out when eating but am finding if I eat with people I'm a lot less self-conscious and even sharing my food diary on myfitnesspal I'm blessed to have the help I do and pray HP is looking after all of us here! *peace*

[revmister 17]

I know everybody has their reasons for wanting to loose weight. Mine is about mobility. As a child I had weakensses in my lower body. I had a disorder that I believe was due to a reaction to the polio vaccine. Motor Neurons died in my legs leaving loss in muscles. I pretty much got by fine & played sports as a kid but always have been leg weak! Along with this weakness I have been overweight since the age of six.

As I have aged my walking gate and weight have taken a toll on my joints. One knee more than the other and both ankles along with my back have suffered. I also have arthritis in these joints. I started shortly after the new year (2012) to have to use a walking stick to get around... & prevent falling. I have balance issues and feel it would be easy to fall. I also found myself using motorized shopping carts when in stores for the past two years.

As I started to think things over I could see that very soon I would probably not be able to walk around ... This has been my motivation for surgery. It is my hope that I will recover my ability to navigate without the aid of canes or motor scooters...

I guess I could add that taking blood pressure meds for 27 years & diabetes medicine for the past 2 years should have been enough motivation along with CPAP machine at night... But it was mobility that made me want to get help with my weight!

Beyond all this my wife & I are raising our Grandson who will be 17 months on the 15th... I cannot keep up with him which places the bulk of the burden on my wife. I cannot bear to sit back and make her do all the work! He loves us both very much and depends on us completely!

[suegirl 109]

I have watched my weight climb since I turned 40.. The doctor, family, and friends all claim that is "normal"... 110 lbs in 6 years IS NOT NORMAL... All health systems check out normal. No co-morbidities and apparently no one believed I weighed over 225 lbs. I was playing with my grandson and the boyfriend asks me what "that noise" was... That noise, was my knees... they grind so loudly. I too have shrunk an inch which doesn't help.. But I had to travel to Michigan by plane for work and the armrest wouldn't stay down because my hips were in the way... I was so embarrassed and so done living like this... I was limiting my life to accommodate my size... Not any more.. I am scheduled for surgery this Wednesday...

[mendymayhem 52]

Two years after diagnoses of diabetes, I felt like I was losing the battle. Three months after being released from the hospital I had brought my a1c from 12.6 to 5.7. After a few more months it began to climb. I realized what is meant by a progressive disease. It is so scary to realize how out of control your body can become, and to feel so helpless. To know the damage that will come in the future to my organs,limbs. I started research a year ago this month. Tomarrow my surgeons office is sending for authorization . I have a husband I love dearly, two grown daughters, two son in laws and two precious grandchildren. I want to participate un encumbered in their lives and I want to live mine.

[JMarshall 352]

The Final Straw for me was going to a doctor and stepping on the scale and it hitting 540 pounds . when my mother saw the scale she looked me dead in my eyes and started crying. My mother already lost my sisters 4 years ago from complications from Multiple Sclerosis .i know when she saw that scale she saw me in a grave next to my sister. i had also been having back issues and blood pressure issues. I saw myself in a full mirror and did not recognize who i was starring at. At that point i decided that i had to do something. A Lot of people say that this is elective surgery but for me it was not elective at all. Either i have the surgery or i'm dead by the age of 30. Best decision of my life

[rmbtcb4evr 29]

This is my first post, so I hope I am doing this right. I was diagnosed with diabeties last August. My parents both have diabeties and I have to help with their care. I do not want my son to have to take care of me.

I also was remarried two years ago. I am so happy in my marriage but I hate that I have to take up part of my husband's space when we go to Detroit Tiger games, on an airplane, or at the movies.

I want to be proud of myself. This is one of the hardest decisions I have ever made. I am only 9 days out of surgery, and although it has been difficult I am hopeful.

I have enjoyed reading about everyone. Thank you!

Robyn

[Liamlover2011 66]

This is my first post' date=' so I hope I am doing this right. I was diagnosed with diabeties last August. My parents both have diabeties and I have to help with their care. I do not want my son to have to take care of me.

I also was remarried two years ago. I am so happy in my marriage but I hate that I have to take up part of my husband's space when we go to Detroit Tiger games, on an airplane, or at the movies.

I want to be proud of myself. This is one of the hardest decisions I have ever made. I am only 9 days out of surgery, and although it has been difficult I am hopeful.

I have enjoyed reading about everyone. Thank you!

Robyn[/quote']

Welcome and good luck. Let us know how you do!

Sent from my iPhone using VST

[cassylady2012 4]

When my blood pressure started going out of control, and my knees had begun to fail. I was forced to realize that these health issues among others including diabetes, arthritis, asthma and sleep apnea, spelled an early death for me. I also realized it could be a very slow painful death.

My knees are gone, those I will never get back. I may have knee surgery but they wouldn't touch it until I knocked off 60 lbs at least.

I have become an old woman before my time. I am more than ready. I also realized I couldn't afford to be overweight anymore. It's too costly. So, I had to choose life.

[ShrinkingBellyKelly 47]

I had lots of reasons and experiences that led me to consider WLS but the proverbial straw that broke the camel's back was going on vacation with my husband (no kids!) and feeling sick about being in a swimsuit, then coming home and seeing a photo of me at the beach and I swear I looked like Jabba the Hut. My seminar was 2 weeks later and the rest is history.

[LizTex2587 212]

My "Straw that broke the camels back" came on gradually, and then finally hit me all at once.

I have never been a tiny person. Even in school I was always just a little bit rounder than everyone else even though it was not morbid obesity. Over the past 7 years, I have steadily gained wait and was pretty much in a state of denial as to how big I am. Until I saw some photos...After that, i was more aware of my weight that ever before. I have an arthritic condition and the extra weight makes it very painful. Like so many of you, I got tired of not fitting into seats at certain establishments...it is so embarassing...I'm always afraid I will have a "Shallow Hal" moment and various modes of seating will collapse under me! I always make that joke to my closest friends who know my struggles and we have a good laugh...but there is always that small fear that that could be a reality for me under the right circumstances. Now please let me preface the following statement by saying that while I am a very "weepy" person , that's just how I deal with things, I am not one of those moping people looking for sympathy wherever I may find it. Having said this, I'm an only 25 and (however true or untrue this may be) I feel that if I continue to look and feel as I do that I will be alone forever! Almost all of my friends are married with children or in serious, heading toward marriage, relationships. I know that everyone is different and no two people live the same life, but good grief!! Something's gotta give! Forgive me for being totally transparent, but I feel this is a real & valid fear! But the one thing that finally gave me a reality check about this whole situation was when my parents (I live at home) sat me down and told me that I needed to do something because they were worried about my phyiscal & emotional health. Now nothing major has happened yet, and I am still in the preliminary stages but even if for some horrid reason I am not able to fund this surgery through insurance, I refuse to allow my life to be stagnant any longer!

...my word... now my fingers are numb from typing!

[Cookeeeeez 269]

@ liztex! I think fear of being alone is a valid one! I had bullies (including my older sister) who always told me no man would want me because if my weight! That's been proven untrue on multiple occasions but I was more worried no man would want me coz I'm a nutcase! Lol

At twenty five myself I am worried I will never be able to have children with my partner! I'm hoping this surgery will help with that! But for me it's not really going to begin until mid next year- so im being patient

Be patient too, we have made the decision not to die young- so now in every sense of it we have our whole lives ahead!!!

Good luck!!!

[Bright Future 9]

Wow, where do I start:

1) Having difficulty putting on my socks every day.

2) Trying to bend over to cut my toe nails

3) Being afraid that the chair I was sitting in would break

4) Not being able to fit in any of the stadium seating

5) An the final last straw - flying in a plane and the seat belt didn't fit and getting humiliated by the flight attendant in front of my family, sister, niece, and almost every passenger on the plane when she basically yelled at me and did so in a voice loud enough that pretty much everyone on the plane was aware.

[fallingwhisper 187]

My "Straw that broke the camels back" came on gradually' date=' and then finally hit me all at once.

I have never been a tiny person. Even in school I was always just a little bit rounder than everyone else even though it was not morbid obesity. Over the past 7 years, I have steadily gained wait and was pretty much in a state of denial as to how big I am. Until I saw some photos...After that, i was more aware of my weight that ever before. I have an arthritic condition and the extra weight makes it very painful. Like so many of you, I got tired of not fitting into seats at certain establishments...it is so embarassing...I'm always afraid I will have a "Shallow Hal" moment and various modes of seating will collapse under me! I always make that joke to my closest friends who know my struggles and we have a good laugh...but there is always that small fear that that could be a reality for me under the right circumstances. Now please let me preface the following statement by saying that while I am a very "weepy" person , that's just how I deal with things, I am not one of those moping people looking for sympathy wherever I may find it. Having said this, I'm an only 25 and (however true or untrue this may be) I feel that if I continue to look and feel as I do that I will be alone forever! Almost all of my friends are married with children or in serious, heading toward marriage, relationships. I know that everyone is different and no two people live the same life, but good grief!! Something's gotta give! Forgive me for being totally transparent, but I feel this is a real & valid fear! But the one thing that finally gave me a reality check about this whole situation was when my parents (I live at home) sat me down and told me that I needed to do something because they were worried about my phyiscal & emotional health. Now nothing major has happened yet, and I am still in the preliminary stages but even if for some horrid reason I am not able to fund this surgery through insurance, I refuse to allow my life to be stagnant any longer!

...my word... now my fingers are numb from typing! [/quote']

This sounds like almost exactly what I would type. Except for breaking the chairs, because thankfully I've never done that. It sounds like we have a lot in common

[teen72381 29]

In November of 2010 my boyfriend of three years proposed. Now I should have been over the moon happy, but all I could think was: "Why does he want to marry me?". In my head we were going to get married and because I didn't care enough about myself I was going to leave him a widow early. So why would he want to make that kind of commitment to me?

I then I started thinking about the rest of my family and how my health was affecting them. I have a beautiful niece and nephew I can't keep up with. My father is in another state and I can't visit him because I am too big for the airplane seat. And my mother, she lives with us because she has advance COPD and I couldn't imagine not being around for her.

All of these thoughts just from a little ring... So i decided I needed to make a change. After some time dealing with some family stuff and a job change I was finally able to take my first step in March of this year, and will be having my surgery next week 9/26/12!